Every Generation Needs a New Revolution #OC20 Notes

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Some people will never admit they changed their minds. Every generation needs a new revolution. – Reggie Joiner

Have you ever changed your mind?

If you could go back and visit the 20-year-old version of yourself what would the interview look like? What would you tell them about how you changed your mind? What advice would you give them? 

How have you changed your mind? How have you changed your mind back? 

Politics? Coffee? Enneagram? 

“People who change their mind, in many ways, are my heroes.” 

What would it look like if we could just created a climate and a culture where we were all honest about changing our mind in a way that’s healthy. 

When someone changes their mind it convinces me they are adaptable, honest, vulnerable, and human. 

If you don’t know what to do, ask yourself the question, “Why did you start doing what you did?” 

When you remember WHY, you will realize it’s OK to change your mind. 

If you’re going to be a leader that’s going to lead through change, you have to be willing to change in order to spotlight and highlight what never changes. 

When you change and when you change your mind, it doesn’t mean your soft or indecisive, it means you can learn, dream, grow, forgive, have empathy, be a leader and be trusted to lead change. 

Paul was someone who changed in a radical way. Anti-Christian but changed. The radical conversion of Paul points to the reality of Jesus. 

Paul would say, “Sometimes it takes a crisis before you can see.”

Paul changed his mind about the Old Testament because of Jesus. Paul changed his mind about BBQ. Paul changed his mind about Peter. Peter was still difficult because Peter had a hard time changing his mind. 

Paul changed his mind about the temple, circumcision, Barnabas, races, nations, and women. Paul was someone who changed his mind. 

A powerful dichotomy with his story and his life. It’s okay to change your mind. It’s important to change your mind. 

Paul changed his mind about people who don’t believe the way he believes. Paul changed his mind about love. 

1 Corinthians 13 is such an interesting idea because of Paul. He wrote a letter so that he can say to a church that sometimes you get confused. Sometimes you forget that what you do needs to be connected to a why and I want to give you a crystal clear why. 

When you remember WHY, you’ll have a FILTER to evaluate everything you do. Paul’s list was different than their list. So what if you preach the truth, without love it doesn’t matter. 

One of the most earth-shattering moments was when Paul said, “If you have FAITH that can move a mountain but you don’t have love, it adds up to nothing.” Paul prioritizes love over faith. A new measurement. That Love Does and Love Wins. His list isn’t about doctrine, worship style, or the church but about love. 

Do you want to evaluate your church? Here’s the list. Love It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. 

The mic drop was “these three things remain; faith, hope, and love. And to put an exclamation mark he clarifies it again by saying the greatest of these is love. 

It’s almost as if Paul knew the difference of faith without love and faith with love. How people can use faith without love to justify their actions but when you put love in the mix it keeps everything in check. 

When you give kids a faith, it needs to be anchored to love. And hope needs to be tied to love because faith or hope without love doesn’t go anywhere. 

Even the great commission with the absence of love doesn’t make as much sense. 

“You can’t make the right kind of disciples if you don’t really love your neighbor.” 

The why of your mission, the great commission, is the why driven by love. 

Most people aren’t looking or a community of faith, they are looking for a community. Then they will listen to what you say about faith but first community. 

When you remember WHY, you lead others to reimagine HOW. 

Overtime the how begins to shape our identity. Over time it’s easy to allow the how to become more important than the why. How is easy to see and do. How is more measurable. How shapes our identity and then when the how shifts we have an identity crisis. 

The truth is, if you wrap your identity around how you do what you do, you set yourself up. Maybe the identity crisis isn’t the church in general. Somewhere in the context of the wrestle there is a theme that affects our identity. The elephant in the room isn’t communion, confession, or baptism, but the how we do things Sunday. 

We grew up believing and we still do, that there is something magical about Sunday. One day a week built in to set aside. Sunday has been a very important part of our week. Sunday is one of the best opportunities to experience community. People are designed for each other. They are designed to be in a space together. Today we are re-discovering those spaces and finding some digitally. 

Churches should create the best possible experience for families who show up at church on Sunday. 

What you do on Sunday is a big deal and all of a sudden when Sunday stopped, it’s no wonder we began to struggle with what that means. 

Reggie changed his mind about Sunday. He decided that we needed to engage families at church on Sunday. There was something more important than just engaging the kids and we needed to engage the parents. Then Reggie changed his mind about not only engaging the families who showed up at church but we need to leverage Sunday to engage families who are at home. 

To go back to the why we would say we our goal is to help churches to partner with parents to influence the faith and future of a child. What would it look like to think in terms of helping parents win? On Sunday in the church and outside. 

“What happens at HOME is MORE IMPORTANT than what happens at CHURCH.”

What happens at home has more influence. Parents have more time and more influence. The average family has about 3000 hours to influence kids. The average church has about 40 hours with kids who show up constantly. Over time it’s easy to drift and forget the power of what happens at home. We begin to think about what happens at home is “as important” then later you think what happens at church is more important than home. You drift. 

Can we turn the volume up on how we focus on what happens on Sunday in homes? 

Can we think about the families who do show up and be intentional about the families who do not show up. Church will always be a priority for some families, but not for most. 

So, what if every family became a priority for your church, especially those who don’t attend. 

2 mindsets in our country. 

A Sunday at home mindset, they stay home. A Sunday at church mindset, they go to church. 

And some people have both. The tension in our culture is this tension. Most people are Sunday at home families. And most churches are programmed to be Sunday at church churches. 

After Covid-19, families will go back to church. Not all will go back right away. 72% of Americans say they will not go back to a football game until there is a vaccination. Even in the light of the uncertainty of all this, what happened in this crisis is an amazing wake-up call. This gave us the opportunity to think about everyone who’s not coming to church. It forced us to expand our mindset and innovate back to another idea about the family and the home. 

Don’t stop thinking about that when the doors open back up. Let’s keep thinking about the people that don’t come. 

“What if there’s a way to expand our Sunday-at-Church mindset to include a Sunday-at-Home mindset? The truth is a lot of people don’t go to church. What does it look like if we decide the why is love and we need to be intuitional about loving those at home. The number is growing in the Sunday at Home mindset. 

Stats show a 10% drop in church attendance over the last 50 years, now in the last 10 years another 10% drop. Most of our energy goes to Sunday at church. What would it look like if we gave energy to Sunday at home? 

Boomers 76% identify as Christians and 35% have a Sunday at home mindset.

Gen X 69% identify as Christians and 32% have a Sunday at home mindset.

Millennials 49% identify as Christians and 22% have a Sunday at home mindset.

Our tendency is to then try to do church better. But what if we reimagined the how? Look at the big picture. 

In every statistic there’s about a 46-44% difference in those who identify as Christians and those who go to church. So what if we re-imagined the church. What if we tried to raise the 49% stat because more people will in turn show up at church. What if we care about people who have a Sunday at home mindset. What does it look like to bridge into the world of those with a Sunday at home mindset. 

Millennials: 80% believe in God, 69% believe in Heaven, 67 believe religion is important, 64% pray. We assume sometimes that if they have a Sunday at home mindset then they don’t believe in God or are not faith-friendly, but they are interested in spiritual issues. A huge part of our population care about spiritual issues they just don’t go to church. What if we cared for that group? 

Jesus told a parable one day about a shepherd with 100 sheep. If one strays why not leave the 99 for the 1. A powerful message about the value of people. We have about 22% of Millennials with a Sunday at church mindset. We continue to build the church as strong as we can, but what would it look like, in light of what happened in our country, what would it look like for us to leave the 22% to go after the 70%? 

We have a generation who have already redefined church in their mind and they are not showing up on Sunday. 

What would it look like if in your church you started thinking in terms of the families who don’t come, in creative ways? Not simply to get them to change their mind about Sunday but to help them win at home. What if you measured success by Sunday morning attendance and engaging families who don’t show up on Sunday? 

When it comes to budget and vision, if you connect the why to your vision you can get people to invest. There’s a why here that we haven’t even thought about. There are grandparents who would give to that. They have grandkids who have disengaged with the church and would give to something that would help the church re-engage families on their turf in a way that will reengage their faith. They haven’t walked away from God, they haven’t walked away from religion, but they have walked away from attending church. 

If this became a vision we presented in a way that made sense people would follow it. People would say, they have a friend who aren’t going to come to church but if you give me a way to do small group with them to engage with around issues of faith, they will follow. 

There are families who won’t go to your church but if you invite them into something because you are giving them permission to engage faith at home, they would love the idea of being connected to your faith community in a different way then just showing up on Sunday morning. 

The reason we should do this is not the numerical potential but because Paul wrote a letter to the Corinthians. Paul said that love does. 

“Do we love the families who don’t come to our churches as much as we love the families who do?”

What would it look like to put action to that? Yes, Sunday needs to be the best opportunity of the week, but this crisis has taught us to not only get ready for those who come on Sunday but to get ready for those who can’t come or won’t come. 

The church isn’t going anywhere. This isn’t the first storm the church has faced. This isn’t our last wake up call for why we do what we do. 

Somewhere in the context of this all we are trying to do is lean in and ask what would it look like for you to leverage your resources and think in term so this unprecedented time of sending a message to people who don’t know how they connect with you in the church. 

This crisis is like Paul on the road to Damascus. Paul pivoted. Paul changed his mind. It clarified his identity. Paul at that moment in time is the leader that God called to change the gentile world. 

Have you ever wondered WHY you are leading in this moment?

Have you wondered where you fit in this? Have you wondered why you are leading at this moment? In the middle of something that shakes our identity to our core, you are a leader now. This is an indicator that God wants to do do something unique with you, that you have a voice, and God wants to do something. 

Paul pivoted. We can reach a population that has disengaged. We can leverage this as an opportunity to let them know we care about what happens in their home and we want them to win. We can redefine ourselves in a culture that has already redefined us.  

Want to watch the opening session? Click here: https://www.facebook.com/watch/live/?v=295568868115843&ref=watch_permalink

Navigating Change Requires Courageous Leaders

Jimmy Mellado and Reggie Joiner

We are all poor and rich, just in different ways. 

When visiting churches around the world you see that they may not have money but the churches and families with Jesus in the center have all they need. 

The crisis we are all experiencing can be a tool. Something used to help us develop empathy. You have people hurting who have never felt this pain but you also have people around them with constant pain. We need to build empathy to learn and see each other differently. 

This pandemic doesn’t discriminate on status or levels of power. It’s hitting the rich and the poor. The pandemic was a leveler. It doesn’t discriminate on finances or power. The community is coming together because everyone is hurting. 

Leadership is influence plus courage. 

How do you respond in a crisis when you lose productivity and control? Left to ourselves and focusing on ourselves it leads to depression. One of the best antidotes is becoming others-centered. Serving other people. One of the best things you can do for your spatial, emotional, and physical health is serving another person. Leverage your influence and your courage to serve others. Your soul will be built in the process. 

New doesn’t happen without leadership and leadership doesn’t happen without courage and influence. Take people to a new place, a better place. 

Culture doesn’t define what a church should do. Innovate to the original. What is the original intent God placed on the church? Jesus was the most attractive and magnetic person on the planet. When the church doesn’t resemble Jesus, somethings wrong. Change in the church is about deconstructing the human part to look more like Jesus. 

In NFL stadiums lights are turned off. Would we help them fill a symbolic stadium because of Covid-19 and join compassion to sponsor 70,000 kids?

Change Reminds Me Things Can Change

Jonathan Williams 

2 Corinthians 1:3-4
“All praise to God, the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ. God is our merciful Father and the source of all comfort. He comforts us in all our troubles so that we can comfort others. When they are troubled, we will be able to give them the same comfort God has given us.”

I am just here.

Churches need to get back to their human-ness. Opening up, sharing the pain we’re most scared to share, are the things that can bring people to Christ who are feeling hopeless.

I think the church has an amazing opportunity right now to share its humanness.

Mike Foster, Kara Powell, Kristen Ivy, and Reggie Joiner

How can we as leaders respond to stories like this? 

Jon held a story of suffering inside for about 26 years. Because he held this story, he suffered alone. I want to lead in a way people don’t have to suffer silently with their stories regardless of how they look like. We can create safe places for people to be able to open up. 

You set the tone and the pace for how safe people feel. Sharing our own not so perfect story opens the door. Go first with your own story. 

What do we do when people open up and share their story. 3 responses. 

Validate their pain and feelings. Don’t dismiss or control. Don’t just give them a bible verse. 

Appreciate and honor that act of bravery. 

Refer. We don’t have to have a solution to everybody’s problems. This lie leads you into horrible heart work. You will be over your head so get in the habit of referring and not being the hero with all the answers. Come along the community of healers and helpers. Support in a collective. 

How do we show up in this space and help? 

We are in a unique time and experience. Old coping mechanisms have been stripped away. You can’t fill your time with more activities and people because the world has changed. Step into suffering. 

Kara has been asked a question in the last couple of weeks. Before the quarantine, it was hard to understand young people’s anxiety. Now that we aren’t in the same room it’s even harder to identify anxiety, depression, and suicidal thoughts. How do we get a gage today? 

Be a great listening. Give the gift of full presence. This is what Jesus did and this is the mark of true love. 

I’m here, you’re not alone, but it is your work to get done. 

Opening the door is such a big deal when partnering with parents. Parents can have conversations with their kids. Look kids in the eye and ask how they are doing and let them know there is nothing they can’t tell us. 

Tips for building relationships? Sometimes we live in denial about our own kids. We know other families are struggling but not our kids. Ask the hard question and lean in. What is sleep looking like? What is eating look like? What is the tone of conversations? You can’t delegate this role to a pastor. 

On a scale of 1 to 10. 10 being very anxious and 1 not being anxious at all. 6 and above you need to bring in support. If they can’t pick their own number say I feel like you are a # and see how they respond. Do something to create specificity and put it into words. Draw what you’re feeling inside. 

A daily check-in with your mind, your heart, and your body. How are your thoughts? What are the emotions you are feeling right now? Can you name them and identify them and are you carrying them? In your body are you holding any tension in your body? Your body communicates your mental health but you rarely ask how you are feeling in your body. 

There are times we miss it and the signs are hard to read. If your kids are suffering and you had no idea, that is very common. As proactive as you can be there’s not one thing you could do to make everything safe for your kid. 

We carry a lot of guilt and shame around these topics and it brings more bad health. 

Give them a way to qualify their feelings. How is the weather? 

Mental health is not a one-person solution. Community Care. Bring in additional help and resources. 

OrangeLeaders.com/resources 

If you’re wrestling right now, invite someone in. 

We as leaders need to gather help, use the resources available. 

Give hope to a generation. Hope is one of the things that remain and hope is tied to love. 

The Gospel is Still Good News

Kristen Ivy

 Is the hope that I have to offer really enough. 

Ask yourself why 5 times. 

Why is the Gospel good news? Why? Why? Why?

We need to be prepared to give an answer but we need to pause to ask the question of why they are asking the question. 

The good news to me might not sound like good news to someone else. Pause long enough to know how to respond to people. 

Become all things to all people. Paul was suggesting we need to understand people first. It’s hard to give people hope before knowing why they need hope. Understand their perspective. 

If you want the good news, to sound like good news, you need to understand WHY it’s good news for everyone.

The Gospel is good news for everyone 

(from 5 essential perspectives)

World 1 Separation &  Union

Problem: Abandonment

Jesus is the revealer and gives us hope of heaven. 

World 2 Conflict & Vindication 

Problem: Oppression

Jesus is Messiah/ Liberator

World 3 Emptiness & Fulfillment  *Majority

Problem: Insignificance

Jesus is Example/ Model

World 4 Condemnation & Forgiveness

Problem: Sin/Ego

Jesus is Savior/ Redeemer

World 5 Suffering & Endurance

Problem: Meaninglessness

Jesus is Suffering Servant

It matters if you want to give hope…if you want to give an answer to the question someone is asking. 

What do you do when someone says, “I don’t feel as guilty as they want me to feel.” How do you share the Gospel with someone who doesn’t see the need for this good news? 

Whenever you deliver one kind of worship song, preach one worldview, you are lacking a theology that someone in the room needs. 

If you want the good news to sound like good news, we all need variety. What worship songs speak to all 5 perspectives? What messages would preach to all 5 perspectives? There is a richness to the Gospel if we just lean into it completely. Remember why the Good News is the good news for everyone. 

The Grace You Give Yourself Changes Everything. 

Nona Jones

Outrun the pain of past failure. 

Peter, the Rock. 

Who do you say I am?
The Messiah the Son of the living God. 

Shame – What I did.

Guilt – Who I am.

The Rock is saying who I am.
The Rooster is saying who I will never be.

No matter how deeply you have been broken, you are never beyond the reach of God’s grace.

Your brokenness is not your burden, your brokenness is your ministry. 

My grace is sufficient for you. My strength is made perfect in weakness. 

The grace you give yourself changes everything. 

Step into the second act of your calling. Peter accepted the grace God gave him and his situation. 

How to Build Digital Community? 

No matter what you think you know, you never know what the future knows. This uncertainty is an opportunity. 

Church, you have to pivot. 

You have to let go of normal. God is kicking us out of the box of what church is. Jesus put his name on people not on buildings. You innovate to the original. Going back to the starting point of what really matters. 

How you can learn and teach yourself? Who can you talk to and listen to? 

Don’t be intimidated by tech. It’s built to be user friendly. Investigate and explore. 

Dive in. You’re not going to learn with a manual or article. You will learn by doing it. 

Don’t relegate technology to the social media team. You will become so reliant on them you won’t be able to function. 

The future is bright. God knew this was going to happen. He called you to leadership during this season. You are placed here for such a time as this. Lean into the opportunity it provides. Don’t allow the enemy to make you feel overwhelmed. 

Everything Changes But You Can Still Play

Simon Sinek

Organizations face change all the time. The internet changed everything, it put some companies out of business and propelled others. What’s different about this is it’s more sudden than what we are used to. 

How are we going to adapt our model to these new times? We have to have these meetings, quickly. 

Why did we get into this business in the first place? When we set out on this journey of risk and uncertainty we stepped out knowing it was worth it. What was worth it then is still worth it now. 

The learning curve is steep. The standards for quality are much lower now. Think at home wearing a t-shirt and things put together with duct tape. We can fix things as we go. There’s an opportunity if we are willing to change. 

Change actually highlights what doesn’t change. 

The crisis is a great revealer of people, inner strength, relationships, and the stupidity of how we have been living our lives. We actually think our political views are important but when a tornado goes through a town we don’t care about color, politics, and our religious beliefs we realize we are all in this together. 

Crisis gets us out of the weeds. We have become a very selfish society. 

If you are leaning into leaders who are on the front lines and saying to them you are in this time for a reason. You have a platform and an opportunity. What should they say and do because the world is watching them. 

This is a time of asking for help and vulnerability. Embrace it. You can’t do it all. People aren’t disposable. There’s too much going on and too many balls in the air to juggle. If you want to save jobs and lives literally and figuratively then say to the people you are working with, I can not do this alone and need your help. As a team, we are strong enough to do this together. Embrace the strength of others. 

Infinity Game – Play to play not play to win. Why keep moving? Finite games have winners and losers with fixed rules. Infinite games you stay in as long as you can to move the game forward. There’s no such thing as winning in education or your marriage. It’s not about being #1 or beating your competitors. You can not win in a game that has no finish line. When you play to win in a game that doesn’t end you destroy trust and innovation. Play the game with the right mindset. This season is just part of the journey. 

This is our first global pandemic but it’s not the first. We will get through this. 

Creating a “Love Works” Model

Joel Manby 

1 Corinthians 13:4-8

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.  It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails.

Love works as a leadership principle. 

Without culture, we don’t keep the great people. Culture is critical to stay and be engaged. 

The level of enthusiasm of your church experience will never rise above that of your employees and volunteers. You have a culture whether you define it or not. Teach the words of love to teach a great culture. 

Love is Jesus #1 commandment and the problem to being effective. 

Engagement scores go up when you put love in place. 

You have a culture whether you define it or not. Most companies have their plaques on the wall for their values but only 10% put practices behind it. Define the words and what they mean. 

Do goals. Be goals. Get the top raise. 

Do goals are numerical and be goals are the type of leaders you want to be. Measured and reinforced. 

If it works, why do we not do it more? 

It might come across as soft or hard to measure. 

Love Works

Create this culture by defining it, put the surveys out, then talk about it continually. Be brutally honest if someone is failing. Allow everyone to speak it back to you. 

Everything Changes But Nothing Changes with Paula Dannielle, Crystal Chiang, Tom Shefchunas

We need to change. How we measure things has to changes. When life changes it helps us look at things differently. What’s under the rug. 

Nothing changes quite like a kid changing through the phases. 

It’s not okay to take the 5 ways the Gospel is good news for everyone for granted in preschool. Talk about the essentials. 

Attendance isn’t a good measure of success. How to measure if a small group is working. 

How do you talk about middle school? What’s the reputation? When you want to gain leaders, you have to talk about the ministry differently. 

Breakout 1 Re-Evaluating Your Next-Gen Ministry with Lisette Fraser

To be ready for when a crisis hits, plan for the life stage transitions.

Church as we know it is closed, we have time to take steps back and evaluate. 

When we reopen how do we make sure we don’t miss the most important things. 

Elevate Community

Give every kid a caring leader & a predictable and safe community where they can grow spiritually.

Because it’s hard we lean into the idea that information creates transformation but we know this is a faulty formula. Information plus conversation multiplied by relationship creates transformation. 

Anything that was a crack now becomes a chasm. If you were lacking leadership in this area then now the crack is huge. 

Reprioritize the importance of community! 

Engage Every Parent

Engage parents to have a positive influence in the spiritual development of their own kids.

Sometimes we think we are better at spiritual developing kids than parents are. Don’t slip into this. 

Another tension is how to engage with a parent that isn’t physically there. The further the parent is the less we consider them. We need to fight for this priority. 

How do you view your role? Are the driver of the faith journey or a passenger in the families car? 

Take an honest look at how many parents you are engaging. Really consider how many you are talking to and when. Are you chasing parents? If they are really the most important how are you engaging them and equipping them for success. 

Align Leaders 

Align leaders to lead with the same end in mind with a common language and a common strategy.

Someone believes they are the red-headed stepchild. They might also think they are the favorite. 

Get everyone on the same page moving the same direction. Every leader matters. 

As a nextgen leader, we help everyone see the whole picture together and to clear the lane for them to run in the right direction clearly. 

It’s easier to allow everyone to run their own direction but it’s not better. 

In a world in constant change, what if the world was the place of peace and stable. 

Have you identified a strategy and common language? 

Do we hold people accountable to it?

Refine the Message

Craft core truths into engaging, relevant and memorable experiences that correlate with the faith formations of each phase.

Every age and phase needs something different. Each message needs to be refined differently. 

Think of a child’s life holistically. Before and after usage and stage-wise, we are all carrying the ball the same way.

Influence Service

Create consistent opportunities for kids and teenagers to serve.

Tension of our scope to serve faithfully. Everyone can serve at every age and stage. How do we reflect that we believe young people can serve now. Equip the adult leaders who will serve with them. 

Can little kids greet? Can they park cars? How do we equip kids and leaders to receive them to be serving? 

Social media now is how to come alongside families. How can we equip parents this week to disciple their kids? What tools can we put in their hands? 

We all think differently and approach ministry differently. We need to hear how other people are doing because it’s not that one is better than the other. 

Find projects you can build together that benefits everyone. Help everyone see that we all have the same kids and are walking them all down the same path. 

We have been hired to champion the phases. Share stories. Nothing changes minds or helps people understand more than a story. Generate and tell great stories. 

First, define reality and know what is there to work with. Next, evaluate how you are doing. See where your gauges are and define direction. 

Leverage tools because people are more important than the grind of ministry. Trust volunteers to lead in significant roles. 

To mobilize kids and students you need to know who you are partnering them with. Help the whole church care about the legacy of the church. We know serving is a significant role. Everyone is searching for identity, belonging, and purpose and serving makes this possible. Help the church and the adults see how them training kids and coming alongside kids to be serving. Remind them of what this was like for them when they first started. Can they do the same for the young person? Maybe they didn’t have a chance as a young person and now they can give a young person a chance. 

Thoughts on digital and physical moving forward? 

There are places where we can be more effective online compared to in person. People might not show up in person but online. Is there a hybrid available where you can do something online and in person. Decentralizing some things. Help people lead in their communities and in their homes. Small groups only for a season, how do we really empower leaders to be doing ministry as opposed to gathering. 

Breakout 2 Relaunching Your Church By Making Families Stronger with Geoff Surratt

What can be more effective in family ministry? 

If you had a lot of kids and a lot of events and no one was arrested then you felt successful. If you sent kids to camp and people were saved every year then you felt successful. In kids ministry if you kept the kids entertained while their parents when to church then you felt successful. Everything changes when you realize the goal is to partner with parents. 

Partner with Parents

Parents are more present at home.

Families are more connected to the church.

The big question was HOW?

The picture of a child with their parent praying with a small group leader over zoom. This is the picture of family minstry. 

Four Revolutionary Opportunities for Families

1 Environments for families to Worship Together

Create experiences where families and kids can come together. Families going to church together in a tent is a memorable experience. How do we carry this idea and experience forward? 

2 Creative ways for families to Play Together

Game nights or kids and their parents.

3 Resources for Families to Grow Together

Parent resource website – one easy to find spot. 

Online small groups for every age, even preschool. 15 minutes of crazy. 

4 Opportunities for families to Serve Together

A family parade to the assisted living communities. Create moments for families to serve together. Birthday drive-by parades. 

We have to make it

Easy

Fun

Meaningful

Groups of 50 or 100:

What can ministry look like with these groups? What does online continue to look like? 

Not just a bandage but new thinking and opportunity. What if it continues like this for the rest of the year or for years? 

Let’s not panic and post something everywhere, let’s take a breathe and realize it’s a marathon. Help them engage again. 

What if we celebrate when families are not at church but pastoring their teams or being out doing ministry? 

Breakout 3 How to Make Small Groups Win for Kids with Keedren & Keturah Boston 

People need two things.
A person and a place.

A gym can still make kids feel like it’s their own place. 

Lead Small – You can have a big impact in kids when you invest in kids. 

Small groups give kids someone. 

Someone who cares. 

A small group leader.

Small groups give kids somewhere. A safe environment and atmosphere to belong.

How are you allocating your resources?  

Act like you believe it.

Improve your structure to make relationships matter.

Structure is important because kids need order. Be organized to be organic. Small groups need to actually be small groups. 

Empower leaders who make relationships matter.

Create experiences where make relationships matter.

How does your calendar year impact small groups? When do you promote? At the end of the kindergarten year do you say goodbye or do you say hello? What are you communicating to kids and families? How do you help your few go to the next level? 

Professionals are not always those with the titles and degrees but the team you are leading. Give them the opportunity and show them the expectations. Do you have consistent leaders who are committed and showing up weekly? 

There’s nothing worse then a leader who doesn’t feel needed or know what is expected of them. 

Your best leaders recruit the best leaders. This is a process not an event. 

Spoil your leaders. Love them. 

Create experiences where relationships matter. Circle Time. Give a talking piece. 

Have compassion and show compassion. 

Zoom and google hangout are a great resource for your families and kids.

Communicate these to families and let the know what’s available. 

Allow leaders to speak into the vision and know they have a safe place to voice insights into the ministry. 

Consider doing training now. 

Record session if people miss things. 

Every Sunday is someones first Sunday. 

Let everyone in the small group speak. Make sure everyone is comfortable sharing. 

Go directly into circles with the talking piece so they are ready to start sharing and talking. Give them something physically to hold and talk. After circle time they break into even smaller groups. 

Breakout 4 – Responding To Kids With Anxiety And Depression with Dave Thomas & Sissy Goff

Anxiety and Depression Statistics

‣ Anxiety is now considered a childhood epidemic in America, affecting 1 in 4 kids. Girls twice as likely.

‣ 10-15% of children and teenagers are depressed at any given time.

‣ Teenagers are 5-8x more likely to fit the criteria for anxiety or major depression than half a century ago.

‣ In a survey of students in grades 9-12, 16% of students reported seriously considering suicide, 13% reported creating a plan, and 8% reported trying to take their own life in the 12 months preceding the survey.

Look for:

A loss of interest in things they used to love. If they withdraw from friends. A lot of tears. An emotional withdrawal. In childhood, it’s recognized pretty easy but in students, it just sounds like adolescences. With teens watch for this to manifest with their peers. Normally kids might feel that way at home and they lift with their friends. 

With anxiety, it’s like the one loop roller coaster at the fair. When they keep coming back over and over again and they can’t kick it. 

Endless questions. When they keep asking the same issues. 

Watch for exploding and imploding. Anger is a secondary emotion. When kids meltdown with a schedule change. With no predictability or lead time they explode. Implodes become perfectionistic. Stomach aches before school. 

Anxiety is also a parenting epidemic. 8 years old is often the onset. Parents might also bring anxiety to their kids. 

Parents escape and avoid it. They might pull them out of situations instead of helping them work through the scary things.  

Anxiety is an overestimation of the problem and an underestimation of themselves. 

Help – For the body, brain, and heart. 

When we are calm we have blood flow in our brains and in the front of our brains to think rationally and manage our emotions. When we are emotionally charged the blood flow moves to the back of the brain and fight or flight kicks in. Help blood flow move back to the front. Start with slow relaxation breathing. Square breathing or combat breathing. 

Grounding Techniques. Move the brain back to the present and not the past. Often teach kids to work with their scenes. 54321. 5 things see hear smell taste. Count backward from 7. Something to reset the brain. 

Then help them with their hearts. Make sure they have an emotional vocabulary. Get a feelings chart. Faces with expressions and words under. Develop an emotional vocabulary because kids are switching words around. They don’t say “sad” anymore they say depressed. Before they said they would run away but today they say they will kill themselves.  

Kids use words but don’t really know what they mean. Help them accurately express their feelings. 

Help kids do the scary thing. Gradually like steps on a ladder. 

Help kids practice. Practice makes progress. 

God has not given you a Spirit of fear. This resets their brain and hides God’s word in their hearts. 

Hope

Kids feel the bravest when someone who loves them reminds them of the truth of who they are. 

 “In this world, you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.” John 16:33

There has never been this space and time when they talk about emotions so much but their faith is not impacting their emotions. We need a net of faith to catch us when we fall. There is trouble but take heart because Jesus has overcome the world. Call out bravery you see in kids. 

Remind kids of the reality of who God called them to be. They are not alone, God is with them and redeeming them. Remind them of this truth. 

Kids often go 2 years before they get help. 

Come to parents in a collaborative way. I wonder if we are seeing the same things. The “of course” principle. Of course, you know we are in it to help you. Of course, you know it would be damaging to talk negatively about your ex in front of your kids. 

Parents who are type-a had anxiety when they were growing up but didn’t talk about it growing up. We want to help find ways to support you and your child at this time. 

Watch your own anxiety in front of your kids because they absorb it. Managing your own anxiety will help your kids with theirs. 

Everything Changes but Change Doesn’t Affect Everybody the Same. 

Monec Johnson, Meaghan Wall, Diane Kim

Build a bridge to families throughout our communities. 

Every family should have a family app. You can customize the parent cue app for your families. 

There’s a gap of about 70,000 kids who need sponsored through compassion. Visit compassion.com/teamup-orange to donate. 

When everything changes, things change in a different way for different people. 

Our perception changes constantly. The church is so tightly sealed in a box that sometimes special needs kids don’t fit in. Make sure every single person can experience the love of God. 

There may be some homes where parents are activity seeking a partnership. Where they need help with their child with special needs. 

Get the resource on OrangeLeaders.com/resources called Every Family 

You can experience a love that liberates from fear. Danielle Strickland

No one can stop an idea whose time has come –Winnie Mandela 

Components of revolutions: 

1) An incredible idea at the right time.

2) A catalytic leader with a community of support.

3) Some sort of mechanism to communicate the original message.

The revolution Jesus introduced was inside out. An eternal revolution.

Love is a revolution. 

Jesus’ revolution started with an idea, the most radical and revolutionary idea ever. The idea that God is love and we are loved by God.

God is love. And you are loved by God. These are the two ideas at the core of the revolution of God.

The fullness of time. Or at just the right time. The idea that God is love came to earth. 

Love is an inside out revolution that awakens us to see what could be.

Love invites us to know the truth, to get at the truth. Not just about God, but about us.

Love woke me up.

Love awakens us to what could be and what should be.

Love empowers us to be the revolution that the world desperately needs.

Love the ultimate revolution. We hold up not a national flag, but a Kingdom flag.

Reggie Joiner, Bernice King, Jennifer Barnes, Sam Collier

Prayer, “God will you give me friends of color.” 

It starts with a desire. If you have a desire you will seek it out. That seeking will lead you to people who are different than you. If you are closed minded, it just doesn’t happen. 

Be a seeker of people who are different than you. 

Be on an open minded journey. 

Treat people with dignity and respect. 

Be a bridge, not just racially but generationally. 

Jesus always talked about us being one. One above all else. It can be difficult to press pause long enough on your pain to connect. If we’re going to see the kingdom rise like never before, we’re going to have to do that Jesus work to pause and connect.

The issue of privilege is a serious issue in our world.

We don’t want to punt the problem to the next generation. We need to dig in and be courageous going forward. 

What is it about the word “privilege” that puts people on the defensive.

Give yourself permission to be vulnerable in relationships. 

We must learn to live together as brothers or perish together as fools.

We need to change our approach for a generation that’s changed their minds.

Paul said I have become all things to all people. 

We need to change our approach for a generation that’s changed their mind.

The Next Generation Still Needs a Dynamic Faith – Andy Stanley

Learn everything we can so we will be better the next time around. Create an icon, something as a physical reminder to take the lesson forward. 

How to invite the next generation into a dynamic faith. “Invite” being the dynamic word. 

What does it mean to have a great church? Be lead by people who love Jesus, love like Jesus, and have a plan to help the next generation love Jesus. 

Churches that have a plan for the next generation, generally do better as a church. Churches invested in the next generation have more resources. 

If you’re going to be a church that is about the next generation, organize your church towards the next generation as far as staffing and budget. No matter what’s on the wall. Organizations are dumb things, they do what they are organized and structured to do. Organize to this idea of the next generation. 

All information and misinformation is at their fingertips 24/7. This sets this generation apart form all other generations. In terms of how we talk about the Bible, we have not embraced this reality. 

Not only do they know what’s in the Bible, because you are teaching them, but they can find out what else is in the Bible. All the parts we have skipped or don’t want them to ask us about. 

This generation is on a meaning and security quest, not a truth quest. We can leverage this for a dynamic faith. This is important in our approach to the invitation. 

Inclusion, diversity, and sustainability are moral issues for this generation. Not political issues but right and wrong moral issues. 

With one silly statement or wrong humor you can undermine your credibility with this generation. This is true in their minds but not consistent in their worldview. 

Love is their ethic but it is loosely and conveniently defined. It’s very situational and conversational. They come to the defense of those who are mistreated but will break up with their girlfriend over text. 

In light of that…

1. Frame the invitation around following Jesus. Rather than an invitation to pray or become a noun of a Christian. A dynamic faith. The word Christian isn’t dynamic anymore but simply a label. Ask, “Are you following Jesus?” Jesus follower reflects the first century calling of a Christian. Someone who is acting or being like Christ. Is it just what you believe or what you do and behave? Lordship. Have you acknowledged God as the Lord you will follow? Be a doer and not just a believer. Doing is what makes all the difference. Do you hear Jesus and put His words into practice? Are your students building their house on sand? 

2. Establish the Gospels as the text that informs their faith. Not the entire Bible. Inviting into a dynamic faith. Draw their attention to the text of the Gospels. The Old Testament got Jesus here but the New Testament shows us who He is. 

Hebrews 10:1, “The law is only a shadow of the good things that are coming—not the realities themselves.” 

The OT looked ahead but now that the reality is here, that should be our focus. We are inviting students to follow Jesus. 

All authority in heaven and earth has ben given to me. Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and the Son and of the Holy Spirit, and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age. Matthew 28:19. 

The starting point of inviting the next generation to a dynamic faith is to invite them to follow Jesus. The Christian faith did not begin with Genesis. The Christian faith began with Jesus. All authority rests with Jesus. The Bible doesn’t create Christianity, Jesus did. 

In the pre-internet world, this concept didn’t matter as much but today the next generation has access to everything in the Bible without ever touching a Bible. So, inviting this generation to a faith based on the authority of the entirety of the Bible is a non-starter because they can discover within 20-30 minutes all the parts that do not support the Christian faith. They are going to ask good questions. Better questions then you ask. They are far less incline to develop a presuppositional faith. 

Our faith can withstand the onslaught of the critics, if we build our faith on the right foundation, the Gospels, Jesus. 

3. Anchor their orthopraxy to Jesus’s new covenant command. Orthopraxy is right practice or behavior. What they do with their bodies and their money. 

Jesus taught in John 13:34-35, “ A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another.” 

Jesus creates the guardrails for this love. Specifically defined. Where we should start in what it looks like to follow Jesus. We don’t get to make this up, we are told exactly what love looks like. To love like Jesus. 

In the Gospels we see this brand of love illustrated through Jesus. In the letters of Paul we see this love applied. Forgive as you have forgiven. Submit to one another. All pointing to Jesus example. 

If the invitation is to be dynamic faith, begin with the invitation to follow Jesus, anchor them with the Gospels, and the beginning of application to follow Jesus is the command to love one another. 

By this the world will see you are my follower, if you love. Following Jesus is about a life you live. At the center is love. This love is laying down your life for a friend. Putting others first. Forgiving because you have been forgiven. Accepting because you have been accepted by God. 

The dynamic of faith is not what we believe but what we do. Following Jesus is dynamic. This makes faith real and practical. 

What does love require of me? 

You can do this. You must do this. 

What’s more important than the faith of the next generation? Nothing.

Build a bridge to families inside and outside of your church. 

Phase Project with Kristen Ivey

What are the basic and core things you need to know at every phase. Every parent knows their child better than any other person on the planet. The guide is designed to help the parent fill the information in with what they know. 

What You Do This Week Still Matters with Doug Fields

Philippians 1:1 “This letter is from Paul and Timothy, slaves of Christ Jesus. I am writing to all of God’s holy people in Philippi who belong to Christ Jesus, including the church leaders[a] and deacons. May God our Father and the Lord Jesus Christ give you grace and peace.”

What still matters is being…In Contact. 

Phone calls worked then and they work now. Recording and sending short videos. Do your kids and leaders know you want to be with them. 

Philippians 1:3-4, “Every time I think of you, I give thanks to my God. Whenever I pray, I make my requests for all of you with joy”

What still matters is being…In Prayer

Are you praying for the flock God has entrusted to your care. Do they actually know about it? 

Type in prayer request and follow up. 

Philippians 1:6, “And I am certain that God, who began the good work within you, will continue his work until it is finally finished on the day when Christ Jesus returns.”

What still matters is being…Spiritually Encouraging. 

This means painting a picture of hope. Church is a safe place for them to return when they do fail. Jesus painted this picture with Simon. What picture are you painting for those entrusted to your care? 

Not as sexy as zoom calls and digital baptism but what the church did and what is on display. Some things just don’t need to change. 

How the church response will change the next generation with Kara Powell 

Pastor Fails

90% of questions how we can do church online. 10% about howe we could be church all week. Is this how we should function? Whether we can meet in person or digital.

How did Jesus spend His time? Certainly not 90% inside the church and in church worship. 

When it comes to our time and engird the revolution focuses less on our worship services and more on our service of others. 

Your churches resources and other’s needs. The beauty happens when these two interact and overlap. What resources do you have that can be leveraged to meet needs. 

Now, consider the resources of young peoples time. Can you help meet the needs of schools in the neighborhoods? Traditions have been crushed. Over the summer, serve locally and offer replacement events. How are you using the resources of young people’s times. Mailing origami. Thinking of you and would love to connect. Help meet needs of your neighborhood. Creating flyers and distributed door to door. Are you struggling, call our church. 

Use young people’s time to serve the marginalized. Senior adults. Senior to senior service. Left with two pots of flowers, one left for the student and one for the senior to give to another senior citizen. 

Visit FullerYouthInstitute.org/orange to maximize your ministry during this pandemic. 

Young people don’t want to go to a meeting they want to be part of a movement. 

Young people leave the church to find the church.

Don’t snap back to normal, harness this time for a new deeper revolution. 

A kid will get over what I teach then, but they will never get over what God does through them.” -Reggie Joiner 

How to Start a Kindness Revolution with Brad Montague

We all still need to be good neighbors. 

Six words from Fred. “You were a child once, too.”

Be who you needed when you were younger. 

Don’t edit someone’s work. Elevate it.

Breakout 5 Developing Other Leaders with Doug Fields 

What makes you a good leader who helps people? That’s just what you do when you care for people. Why are we not very good at it? Many church leaders are busy, scared, and insecure. 

Self-preservation leader: busy, scared, and insecure. 

Few church leaders are intentional with developing other leaders. 

Leaders have to decide if they want to leave a legacy of one or a legacy of many. 

Give up your pride.

Not easy because in ministry we rarely get credit for the work we do. Become a spotlight leader. Insecure leaders don’t bring out the best in others. 

Give up your perfectionism. 

We know the cliche if we want the job done do it yourself. This is not a beatitude from the sermon on the mount. They might not do it as good as you…right away, but you are developing them. 

Give them your genuine belief

I don’t think you can encourage people too much. People are dying for encouragement. People need more encouragement than training. Make a list of your leaders. Pray over them. Ask, what do you see in these leaders that maybe they don’t see. 

You don’t delegate tasks, you dump them

Give them meaningful relationships. 

Give them real responsibilities

A responsibility is significant when both the rewards and the risks are real. 

Give them meaningful relationships 

Invite them into your life.

Not to use them but to know them. If you are burning through leaders and have poor retention then you are using people. 

Give them accountability.

 If you expect something, you need to inspect it. If you hire someone, don’t turn your back on them. Develop them and bring out the best in them. Make them into great leaders. 

3 times a year, Doug goes through leaders and gives every volunteer an a, b, or c. 

A’s need encouragement. Maybe get the pastor or a leader to write them a letter. 

B’s need intentional coaching and hand holding. 

C’s are how you get them into another ministry in the church. 

Give them freedom. 

The best idea wins. You don’t always have to win. Let them lead in a way that is different than you. 

Give. 

Breakout 6 Increasing Your Influence and Effectiveness in Kids Ministry with Kellen Moore

Talk about it.

‣ Talk openly about what is going well and poorly in your world.

‣ Cheer for each other when you’re talking about each other.

‣ Share stories of students that grew up in your kids ministry.

Develop a curiosity about the youth ministry. 

Collaborate

‣ on transitions.

‣ on the budget. 

‣ on space.

‣ on volunteers.

 Create a common language for families

‣ Small groups vs. disciple groups vs. life groups

‣Teaching calendar vs. scope and cycle

‣ Drop-off vs. check-in

‣ Baptism vs. big splash

Breakout 7 Create Something for Kids that Parents Love with Angela Santomero

 Vision: All media must have a vision to make the world a better place for kids

Mission: My Mission for all the media work I do is to empower, challenge and build the self- esteem of kids, while making them laugh!

Healthy Green Media Smoothie

‣ Equal parts: ‣ Educate ‣ Interact

‣ Engage

‣ Helps to create and identify high quality media

 Universal Truths of Kids

Needed to create and identify high quality media: 

‣ Play

‣ Pause 

‣ Repeat 

‣ Model 

‣ Help

 Kindness is at the Foundation of everything we do.

Breakout 8 Things Every Ministry Leaders Should Know About Foster Care with Josh Shipp

Foster kids will test you. 

Like the lab bar on a roller coaster. 

Kids will test you to see if you’ll hold

Foster kids will act out. 

What kids don’t talk out…they act out

The very first adult.

It’s not about you.

It’s about someone prior to you. 

When they act out…you lean in. Double down.

“You are awesome…but this was not. Here’s what’s going to happen.” Give foster kids certainty. I will have to do this. 

Foster kids often feel ashamed. 

690,000 kid in the foster care system.

“I used to be one of the but I felt alone.”

Lies: Alone, Broken, Unlovable.

Goal: Identify a peer “lighthouse” a navigational aid and warn of danger. 

Widen the circle. 

The Power of One Caring Adult TED Talk -for teens. 

Lead them with Vulnerability 

Lead with vulnerability

Start where they are

Voice their skepticism

Lead to where they should be. 

Your imperfections make you human

Your humanity makes you influential. 

Foster Kids Need a Coach

Don’t lecture then – coach them. 

Pre-Game: Rehearse

What potential challenges do they need to be prepared to face? 

Post-Game: Review

What did we learn?

During-Game: Release

Can they succeed without me?

Foster Parents Need Support

Practical Support

3 hours or 3 meals

Encouragement and Consequences

Auto-Schedule encouragement 

Pre-define rules and consequences. 

Every kid is one caring adult away rom being a success story. 

Promote Counseling

Both parents and kids

Destigmitize

Healthy Expectation

Easy Out

If Possible: Remove $$$ hurdle

Counseling is for the breathing. 

To get resources, text the word JOSH to 66866

Book: No Matter What – A foster care tale by Josh Shipp

Final Words with Reggie Joiner

Creativity thrives in crisis. 

People Need:
To stay connected
To be encouraged now
To win this week
To imagine what’s next

What does it take for us to stack hands on a bigger vision to reach the world in the middle of a crisis to remind them that these three things remain: faith, hope and love?

We all need each other. 

Tomorrow start thinking in terms of how do we start talking about this. 

Capture the imagination that is watching. 

Keep changing your mind for the sake of what never changes. 

I hope to see you at the Orange Conference in 2021! Get the best price now at http://theorangeconference.com

Tools to Help You Rise Up Notes

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Mega-Con Online is a virtual experience put on my Kidmin Nation! Many of you have asked for notes so I wanted to make these available. If you really want to dive into applying what you learn you should get the Rise Up Workbook. The Tools to Help You Rise Up chapter in the workbook is 16 pages, here’s a preview if you want to take a look.

Tools to Help You Rise Up Workbook Sample

Tools For Your Time

Apps: Rescue Time, Forest, Hours, 

Beat the Clock Book – Successful Strategies for Effective Time Management.

Wearing a watch

Turn off notifications

Reminders – location-based. 

Create a weekly plan – Benjamin Franklin — ‘If you fail to plan, you are planning to fail!’

Ryan Frank – Productivity PlayBook

Jim’s Evaluation Toolbox – CM Weekly Staff Report

Michael Hyatt -Full Focus Planner® 

Corey’s Weekly Sheet

Use a Calendar

Appointment Keeper, Reminder, To Do (To Stop Doing List)

Set Appointments with God

Set Appointments with your spouse 

Set Appointments with your kids

Set Appointments where you rest. 

Tools for your Soul:

YouVersion App Reading Plan

Blue Letter Bible (App and Website)

Scripture Memory – Fighter Verses App

Scripture Memory Tool – “TIMC BSAC DNBAOD FTLYGIWYWYG.” “This is my command—be strong and courageous! Do not be afraid or discouraged. For the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.” If you want to Rise Up with a solid foundation, fill your toolbox with Scripture. 

First 5 App

The Chosen App 

PrayerMate

Ask Questions

Tools for your Team:

Build A Team – Ephesians 4:12 “Their responsibility is to equip God’s people to do his work and build up the church, the body of Christ.” Don’t try to build up the church on your own. Equip God’s people to do the work of ministry! 

Postagram

LeadSmall – everything small group leaders need to make a big impact

Delegation responsibility and authority 

Duplication yourself in others 

Tools for your Kids

Nameshark 

Kahoot! 

Circle or Bark for parental controls. 

InterLand – beinternetawesome.withgoogle.com a game to teach kids how to be smart on the internet. 

Gabbwireless.com the perfect first phone for your kids 

YouTube – connect where your kids are. Post videos. Consider making a channel for you kids ministry. Connect with your kids Monday through Saturday with YouTube.

Church Database – Run and print a report of birthdays. Or run weekly reports of the kids who are missing. Follow up with your folk and steward what you’ve been given. 

Become the best teacher you can – record the room and see the kids posture and reactions as you teach. Build a team – solicit feedback and grow as a speaker. 

I love kidmin Facebook group – Ask questions, look at pictures of environments, find resources. Stop trying to re-invent the wheel and just use the search function in the group to find the help you need. 

Tools for your Physical and Mental Health:

Do you know how many steps you take? Argus, Health Kit

Are you honoring the sabbath?

MyfitnessPal for calories 

Map my ride, run keeper. 

Discipleship Group – https://replicate.org 

Soul Care or Counselor – Ministry is hard, you need someone to talk to. Don’t burn out. Don’t give up. Get help. 

Maybe right now you need to pause and text someone you trust saying, “I’m not okay, let’s talk.”

John 10:10 “The thief’s purpose is to steal and kill and destroy. My purpose is to give them a rich and satisfying life.”

And The Random Tools:

For those of you who want some specialty tools in your toolbox 

Buffer/Hoostuite

Amazon wish list for your ministry

Grammarly

Slack, GroupMe

Boomerang to schedule emails and follow up reminders if someone doesn’t respond. 

Audible or library

Kidmin Nation library and 365 conference 

Canva

Fiverr

Mint for finances

Good Coffee

So, Trust in the Lord with all your heart; do not depend on your own understanding. Seek his will in all you do, and he will show you which path to take. 

Connecting with Volunteers During COVID-19

Game and Announcements Slides-2

Everything changed…but in a way nothing changed. 

Your main role is still to – “Love the Lord your God with all your heart, all your soul, all your mind, and all your strength.” And to “Love your neighbor as yourself.” 

Redefine your thoughts about your role:
You are not just an event planner, events are getting canceled.
You are not just a communicator on stage, there is no one in the seats.
You are not just someone who finds volunteers for Sunday morning because Sunday has been redefined.

Your role is to Love God and Love Others.
You are to be equipping God’s people to do his work and build up the church, the body of Christ. So how do you re-imagine your role? I want you to start asking the question, “What can it look like?“

Your ministry is not on hold, so ask the questions:
What can it look like to equip God’s people to be the church?
What can it look like to serve the church digitally?
What can volunteering look like in these unprecedented times?
When it comes to your volunteers you need to:

1. Connect

Do you know how your flock is doing? Are you being a good steward of your team?

Text your team

Call your team, especially your older volunteers.

Facetime your team, especially those who struggle with anxious or depressed 

Zoom.Us – 40-minute meetup for free 100 people.
  Google Hangout
  Group FaceTime 

Ask, how homeschooling is going? Ask about their work.
Ask, what can we do to help?
Ask, how can we pray for you?

2. Encourage 

If you’re allowed, drop off something at their door – food, toilet paper. Postcards. Pizza Delivery.

Do something fun – Social game/contest on FB groups!

Help them connect and encourage one another. 

If you have coaches, encourage them to reach out to their teams. 

Send prayer requests and needs to groups

3. Equip or mobilize them. 

Equip your team to serve!

Videos for daily

Postcard

Email to parents

Serve in the community

Drive through church

YouVersion Bible App Study

YouVersion Prayer

MarcoPolo scheduling volunteers to be online. Such a great idea! 

4. Pray for them and pray with them.

Open up your volunteer roaster and pray down the list. 

And say, “Hey, before I let you go, can we pray together?”

Let’s rally together. A lot of church are seeing online church x6 regular attendance! Families are having a mealtime around the dinner table! Parents are huddling up together in their living rooms to open up God’s word. God is doing something today, let’s roll up our sleeves and be the church!

Picking Curriculum Breakout Notes for #CPC20

Random Facebook Post

Did you know there are over 50 kids ministry curriculum options each with their own unique way of doing things!?! Let’s explore the options and determine what questions you should be asking before you get started!

  1. Why Curriculum? What purpose does it serve?
    1. Tool Belt Teaching
      1. The Lesson –  The scope and sequence, the strategy, the goals, repetition vs. redundant, age-appropriateness
      2. Games – Do they help kids connect? Do they serve a purpose? Do they further the teaching? Are they fresh?
      3. Small-Group Materials – Supply lists, well-crafted questions, fun? 
      4. Videos and Graphics
      5. Worship Songs
      6. Crafts
      7. Environments
      8. Scripture Memory
      9. Parent Resources
      10. Social Media Plan
      11. And so much more…
    2. Tool Belt Varieties
      1. Some are too big
      2. Some are old
      3. Some tools don’t fit
      4. Some you just don’t like
      5. Some you don’t understand
    3. A good fit has the right belt with the right tools. But still, it takes work. 
  1. Question 1 – Will this curriculum help your kids learn the Bible?
    1. Is scripture read and taught?
    2. Will the lesson connect with your kids?
    3. Do the supplemental materials reinforce the Bible?
    4. Does the teaching lead to life-changing application?
    5. Will the kids be engaged and interested in the lesson?
    6. Does this curriculum make learning the Bible fun?
  1. Question 2 – When your kids completely the curriculum will they produce the fruit you are desiring to see in their lives?
    1. Wise and foolish builder illustration
    2. Bible knowledge and application
    3. The vision of your church
    4. Begin with the end in mind
  1. Question 3 – Will this curriculum be a good fit for your program?
    1. Does the lesson length fit your needs?
    2. Will the materials change lives or just fill time?
    3. Does the curriculum provide the service components you are looking for?
    4. Is it flexible? 
    5. Is it manageable?
  1. Question 4 – Will this curriculum be a good fit for your kids?
    1. What age level is it designed for?
    2. Will it make sense culturally and socioeconomically? 
    3. Are their materials for children with special needs?
    4. Are there supplemental materials your kids will enjoy?
    5. Does it encourage community and build relationships?
    6. Will your kids be engaged and have fun?
  1. Question 5 – Will this curriculum fit in your budget?
    1. What is the starting price of the yearly curriculum?
    2. What is the full and real cost of the yearly curriculum? 
    3. What is the cost of the supplemental materials and props?
    4. Are scholarships or flexibility in pricing available?
  1. Question 6 – Do other churches, like yours, recommend this curriculum?
    1. What are churches in your denomination using or avoiding?
    2. What curriculum has your church used over the years and why did they change?
    3. Do churches a little larger than you recommend it? 
    4. What are the arguments against using the curriculum? 
  1. VIII.Question 7 – Does this meet family needs? 
    1. Do the materials take the Sunday lesson into Monday through Saturday? 
    2. Does the curriculum matter for 1 hour a week or 168 hours each week?
    3. If a child attends every other week will they be able to follow along? 
    4. Are materials provided in the curriculum to equip the family?
    5. Will a nontraditional family feel included?
  1. Question 8 – How do you access and edit the curriculum?
    1. Do you have the technology necessary to make the curriculum accessible to volunteers? 
    2. Do you need a CD-ROM drive, jump drive, or high-speed internet?
    3. Do you have the audio, visual, and technical supplies to present the lesson?
  1. Question 9 – How much work will it take for you to make changes? 
    1. Is it editable and easy to alter? 
    2. Are there plenty of options if you don’t like a particular portion? 
    3. Are you going to be making minor tweaks or major rewrites? 
    4. Do you have the time and margin necessary for the changes? 
  1. Question 10 – Do I really need to change?
    1. Are you the only one feeling the need to make changes?
    2. Could you add some flavor to spice things up or do you need to change the recipe? 
    3. Is now the right time?
  1. A special note before making changes. 
    1. The change in your pocket illustration. 
    2. What’s at stake?
  2. Let’s look at some options

 

A link to this full google sheet: HERE

 

In a recent KidzMatter Magazine, you can see a description and overview of many curriculum options.

Screen Shot 2020-01-15 at 1.02.26 PM

 

This is a curriculum evaluation created by a team made up of 60 practitioners with years of weekly classroom experience.2

What do you do from here?

    1. Pray
    2. Research
    3. Contact curriculum providers
    4. Explore samples
    5. Seek wise counsel
    6. Pray

Is Your Anchor Attached to the Almighty?

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Have you ever heard a speaker address a large crowd, but knew God was using the person to speak directly to you?

I’ve attended many conferences and have heard many speakers deliver top of the line messages but for some reason, there has been one message rolling around in my head more than any other. At this year’s Belonging Conference Robert Madu said, “You don’t have a faith problem, you have an awareness of God’s authority issue.” As he spoke these words, they hit my heart deep and helped me see things about myself I’ve been missing for years.

If faith is the anchor to your life, I’ve always had a strong anchor. I hope for the things of God and see the evidence of Him lived out in my life, but an anchor needs to be attached to the boat. Robert Madu explained how the chain is your awareness of God’s authority in your life. You see, for me, I believe God has the whole world in His hands, but I fail to trust Him as the authority in my little corner of the world. What struck my heart was the need to see God as the ultimate authority in everything in my life, both big and small.

The prophet Daniel understood God as his authority and it’s evident in the scripture. Daniel 6:6-7says:

So the administrators and high officers went to the king and said, “Long live King Darius! We are all in agreement—we administrators, officials, high officers, advisers, and governors—that the king should make a law that will be strictly enforced. Give orders that for the next thirty days any person who prays to anyone, divine or human—except to you, Your Majesty—will be thrown into the den of lions.

Daniel could have lived his life under the authority of the king, but this thought never even crossed his mind. Daniel 6:10 tells us, “But when Daniel learned that the law had been signed, he went home and knelt down as usual in his upstairs room, with its windows open toward Jerusalem. He prayed three times a day, just as he had always done, giving thanks to his God.”

When the authority of the world said you must worship a certain way, Daniel knew God’s authority was bigger. When the consequence for worldly disobedience was certain death, Daniel knew God has power over death.

Everything is under the power and authority of God! And He cares deeply about your little corner of the world, just as He cared for Daniel. God Almighty can handle whatever the world is throwing at you.

The next time you feel the pressures and stresses of life weighing down on you, take a look at the chain tied to your anchor of faith and ask yourself a hard question, “Are you aware of God’s authority in this issue?”

A Practical System to Be a Creative Teacher

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A Practical System to Be a Creative Teacher
by Corey Jones
Deep Dive Master Classes #6 

System: a set of principles or procedures working together as parts of a whole – an organized scheme or method.

Learning Retention Rates
Lecture 5%
Reading 10%
Audio-visual 20%
Demonstration 30%
Group Discussion 50%
Doing (including VR) 75%
Teaching Others 90%

People do tend to enjoy getting information in specific formats but it’s more about their engagement and interest.

Opposing argument – no one size fits all model. In fact, research shows that teaching students according to different learning styles has no effect on how they perform on assessments. Every time scientists have tried to prove this theory, they’ve failed.

We retain different types of information in different ways. There is truth to this though in how passive a student is and how active a student is for retention. 

Sports and Podcasts Illustration 

The goal is not information retention. The goal is disciple-making!

Teaching a lesson vs. teaching kids

You can’t teach all these ways the whole time but you can slide things in to help retain everyone. 

The role of the Holy Spirit

John 14:26 “But the Advocate, the Holy Spirit, whom the Father will send in my name, will teach you all things and will remind you of everything I have said to you.”

The best I’ve ever taught vs the best they’ve ever listened. 

System – a set of principles and procedures, an organization method. You have a high calling. A huge responsibility. But it’s not all on you. So ask your helper for help. 

SIGHT (VISUAL SYSTEM)

Felt Board
Comic Book Clips
Movie Scene
YouTube Clips
Speechless or Pantomime
Story Pictures
Art
Whiteboard
Blacklight Art
You as the Character
Gameshow or Quiz

HEARING (AUDITORY SYSTEM)

Whose Line Is It Anyway Sound Effects
Seat Sections Make Certain Sounds
Sound Jar
Opera Singing
Karaoke
Recorded Sound Effects
Voiceover
Bring in a Guest Character
Action News Reporter

MOVEMENT (VESTIBULAR SYSTEM)

Kids as Actors
Cue Cards
Action Figures
Acting
Hats
Use the Room as Props

TOUCH (TACTILE SYSTEM)

Object Lesson
Clothesline
Prop Box Costumes
Small Group Leader Statues
Kids Sketch Scenes
Story Boxes

TASTE AND SMELL (GUSTATORY AND OLFACTORY SYSTEM)

Flavors
Candles or scents
Scratch and Sniff Stickers
Imagine the taste

BODY AWARENESS (PROPRIOCEPTION SYSTEM)

Hunger
Swallow
Breathe
Balance
Pressure
Weight
Temperature
Time
Light & Darkness

Other

Audience Participation
Repetition
Mystery
Imagination

The foundation of good teaching is always good communication.

Watch yourself. Hit record and then watch yourself and your class. 

Daniel 11:32b, “But the people who know their God will display strength and take action!”

Slides: A Practical System to Be a Creative Teacher-2 

General Session Notes from #D62019

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General Session 1

RUSSELL MOORE – @drmoore
The Cross as Family Crisis

John 19:16-36

In family, we have the possibility of experiencing a blessing as well as having our hearts completely broken. 

As Jesus is being crucified, family is all over this story. Because Jesus, as He is being crucified is able to look and see His mother. 

God through the family, has prepared Jesus for this moment. The beautify and the horror of what it means to be a family in a broken world. 

We need to get to a place of vulnerability in our families so we can lead people to the cross.

There’s no such thing as a Christian that is all alone.

Jesus is at the cross because He did not live up to His families expectations.

Honor and love family by not putting family first. 

In secularized America, we sometimes put too much emphasis on family. 

The prosperity Gospel of the family. Constantly Instagrammable family, if I do right. This is not what Scripture teaches. 

Because the FAMILY is the signpost for the Kingdom of God it is one of the most intense arenas for spiritual warfare.

JON FORREST – @jondforrest
Fight

https://amzn.to/2ltfFg9

It’s not chill the good chill, it’s fight the good fight.

Lazarus, Mary, and Martha. 

If you spend more time being angry at people not doing what they are supposed to be doing than being in awe of Jesus, you need some recalibration.

Jesus doesn’t stop Mary from opening up with jar of perfume. He is worth it. That is not an offering too large for our Savior. 

PHILIP NATION – @philipnation
Building Great Habits of Discipleship

We’ve got to rework how it is we naturally go about these kinds of things. 

We must move past the bad habits of discipleship and move to the good habits found in Phillipians 2. 

Bad habits of discipleship:

#1 The library – We think discipleship is just knowledge transfer. 

#2 The metronome – Behavior modification. 

#3 The carousel – Entertainment – Bright and moving but going no where. 

“Therefore, my dear friends, as you have always obeyed–not only in my presence, but now much more in my absence–continue to work out your salvation with fear and trembling, for it is God who works in you to will and to act in order to fulfill his good purpose.” Philippians 2:12-13

4 things for you to hold onto and apply. 

1. The habit of growth

“As you have always obeyed.” No one drifts towards holiness. It’s quite the opposite. We slowly move away. Make growth a habit. Exert every muscle in your being. Hurt the next day. It’s why they’re called spiritual disciplines. Work at your salvation. 

2. The habit of worship

“not only in my presence, but now much more in my absence.” What if the radical living we are called to by the radical Christ is where worship is the norm? Jesus wasn’t soft on sin. Both congregationally and moment by moment of the trusting God. What happens in your family and in your life when worship becomes habitual and just normal? Fear and trembling looking to Christ. 

3. The habit of submission. 

“Continue to work out your salvation with fear and trembling, for it is God who works in you.” It’s not a transitional but a transformative relationship with God. What if we had a habitual submission to the power of God? Our relationship with God is an absolute surrender of control to the power of God who is working within you. The spiritual disciples are not the goal, Jesus is. 

4. The Habit of Mission

“for it is God who works in you to will and to act in order to fulfill his good purpose.” Romans 1:5 our work is to bring about obedience to the faith. God is at work in you and adjusting your will, you attitude, your wants, and your desires. Work on the mission of me or the mission of God. Work out of the flesh or the Kingdom of God. Pivot the people of God from being consumers to missionaries. 

Put your yes on the table and then ask God what’s up for discussion. 

General Session 2

PAM TEBOW
The Ripple Effects of Living Out Deuteronomy Six

Be sure you are intentionally impacting others with the gospel by how you live your life. 

If you want to possibly impact the people around you, you need to be intentional. This is the ripple effect, you impact someone who impacts someone else.

We don’t know the impact God’s Word will have on our kids. 

Teach children if they want to have a positive impact on others, they use live their lives in a way that follows the Gospel. 

Love kids unconditionally as God has loved us unconditionally.  

Psalm 62 is my security scripture. We need security because there are a lot of storms in life. 

We wanted our children to know that God’s Word has made us adequate for what He Has planned for us to do.

Find your security Bible verses, know that God is your refuge.

Children are a gift from the Lord. We had a game plan along the way, which was based on teaching our kids the Word of God and loving them unconditionally as God loves us.

CHRISTOPHER YUAN – @christopheryuan
A Prodigal and His Parents’ Journey to the Father

When you encounter Christ, He will impact every area of your life.

Nothing is more important than following Christ.

A powerful and dangerous prayer: Lord, do whatever it takes to bring this prodigal son to you. 

“God’s kindness leads us toward repentance.” Romans 2:4

God’s Word is the most powerful sword to pierce even the hardest of hearts that are full of sin.

What we have in our Bibles is not just ink on paper. It is the very breath of God.

I stopped letting my desires control who I am and instead surrendered to Jesus.

My identity should not be defined by my sexuality. My identity MUST be in Jesus Christ alone.

The question is not “When is it too early to talk about sexuality with our kids?” But in 2019, “When is it too late?”

The opposite of homosexuality isn’t heterosexuality, it’s holiness. 

The opposite of every sin struggle is holiness! Change is not the absence of temptations, but to surrender and seek holiness in Jesus.

Holy Sexuality and the Gospel Book https://christopheryuan.com/books/holy-sexuality-and-the-gospel/ 

Out of a Far Country Book https://christopheryuan.com/books/out-of-a-far-country/ 

To Parents of Prodigals:
You are not
the cure.
You are not the cause.
The goal of Christian parents is not to produce godly children, but to be godly parents. 

Parents, Adam and Eve had the perfect Father and the perfect environment and they still failed. 

General Session 3

RON HUNTER – @ronhunter
The Art of Meaningful and Influential Conversations With Your Kids

Without relationship, there is no influence.

Being related is not the same as a relationship.

Why don’t we enter into our kid’s world rather than try to force them to enter ours?

Kids let electronics be the barrier. Parents let kids with the electronics be the barrier. 

Extroverts

Introverts 

James 3:1-2 Influence of Speech

Proverbs 17:27-28 reduce negative (wear down)

Colossians 4:6 Full of Grace (seasoned with salt)

Ephesians 4:29 Build up others (our kids)

Talk – The ingredients of a conversation. 

Topic – high/low or best/worse or made/sad/glad

Ask – tennis ball game – What made it bad or good? Ask follow up questions. Say, “Tell me more.” Say, “Help me understand that or what do you think should have happened.” Teach them how to think about what went on and learn from it for next time. 

Listen: Your kids can tell if you’re actually concerned or not. Conversation is not one way. 

Kudos: Let them hear 60-80% of who they are rather than what they have done. Teacher picks career path. 

Abe – Formula for Meaningful Conversations 

Lincoln tackled the tough topics with a great tone. He measured his words and understood the power of the tongue. 

Approach – Two keys, intentionality and attitude. Schedule your family time. Table Time is valued over vacations and other family activities by kids. Connect with your kids instead of correcting your kids. 

Brain – Share more than truth with them, share the reasoning that helped you arrive at the conclusion. 

Emotion – Dime vs. Nickel “As seen on TV” Because a child learns through relationships…that’s where they adopt values of those they respect. 

General Session 4

JIM WIDEMAN – @jimwideman
GrandPartners

Deuteronomy 6 wasn’t just written to pastors, it was written to parents and parents who happen to be pastors. 

What if the church and the home had another partner? 

“Only be careful, and watch yourselves closely so that you do not forget the things your eyes have seen or let them fade from your heart as long as you live. Teach them to your children and to their children after them.” Deuteronomy 4:9

God has always had a purpose and a plan for everything He has done.

Have you ever heard of a church that offered training for a grandparent? 

God is giving you a second chance to correct your parenting mistakes. 

Parents need support, this is why naturally there are 4 grandparents and 2 parents. 

Grandfriends: Those who are adopted grandparents to pass on the faith to the next generation. 

We have an opportunity to meet this mission field like never before. Are we going to take advantage of this partner to leverage what we are called to do in family ministry? God is calling us to help grandparents and grandfriends to be the partner God is calling them to be. 

LISSY RIENOW
An Insider Look at Building Heart Connection Within Families

Malachi 4:5-6 

“Behold, I will send you Elijah the prophet

Before the coming of the great and dreadful day of the Lord.

And he will turn

The hearts of the fathers to the children,

And the hearts of the children to their fathers,

Lest I come and strike the earth with a curse.”

My family, who loves me the most, get to see the absolute worst of my personality. 

Who you are at home, is who you really are.

My character needs some serious improvements. I need to grow in Christlikeness. 

Relationship has to come before discipleship. Relationship is the foundation. 

So many teenagers have expressed to me they wished their parents would take more initiative to pray and talk about their faith with them at home.

Family discipleship doesn’t stop with you as parents. It’s an all in family mission with Christ.

MICHAYLA WHITE – @michaylawhite
Millennial Parents of Faith

Millennials…
Parents are boomers
Most diverse generation’
Largest living generation
Highly educated
Digital natives. 

These are just facts, not context! 

Have you ever been to a movie late?

What do they think about the church?
Barna Group Research

Nomads: 18-29-year-olds with a Christian background who have walked away from church engagement yet still consider themselves Christian. 

Prodigals: 18-29-year-olds who have a Christian background but have lost their faith, describing themselves as “no longer Christian.”

Exiles: 18-29-year-olds who have a Christian background and are still invested in their Christian faith but feel stuck (or lost) between culture and the church. 

98.6% of millennial parents highly agree it is very important to me that my children grow up to know, love, and serve Jesus. 

29.6% of millennial parents highly agree I make reading my Bible a regular part of my day. 

We want our kids to love Jesus but don’t understand what discipleship looks like in an everyday life. 

Not committed to our programs but they are committed to relationships. 

They need a teammate and they need someone to pass them the baton. 

Dorsey’s 3 Factors for Millennial Employer Loyalty 

First Impressions – Many Millennial decide on the first day of work whether they can imagine themselves being there long term. 

Clear Path of Engagement – Millennials want to understand the organization quickly and desire to be provided with specific examples of the performance you expect. 

Regular Feedback – Frequent, clear, specific feedback is the way Millennials gauge their effectiveness it builds their connection to their role. 

When it comes to decision making for committing to a church home…Millennial Parents Prioritize:

1. Theological Alignment 

2. Children’s Ministry

3. Preaching and Worship

Safety + Security – aligns with Dorsey’s first impression. #1 concern of Millennial parents when rising a church with their kids. 

Ethos: hospitality and inclusion – aligns with Dorsey’s ease of engagement. #2 concern of Millennial parents when visiting a church with their kids. They need to feel like they belong from the start. When a child is known and loved. 

Disclosure + discipleship relationships – aligns with Dorsey’s individual feedback. #3 concern of Millennial parents when rising a church with their kids. 

Millennial parents of faith will commit to a church that commits wholeheartedly to their children. 

The Silver Bullet:
Invest in their children
Invite their parents over to dinner
Pass the baton

Family means we do more than one meal together. 

JIM PUTMAN – @JimPutmanRLM
Discipleship in the Four Spheres

You people are the heroes in the church…especially you Junior High Pastors.  

How do we create a church from the top down that creates disciples? 

The reason our kids are stumbling and falling is because our parents weren’t discipled in the first pace to understand the role of discipling their own kids. They went to church instead of experiencing being the church.

You cannot divorce the teachings of Jesus from the methods of Jesus and get the same results of Jesus.

The reason we don’t have disciple-making parents is because we don’t have disciple-making churches.

Most Christians reveal their immaturity, by the fact that they are isolated. 

The reason they (kids) don’t buy Jesus is because they know it’s not working for their parents. In the recipe of the faith they (the parents) have left out major components. 

What if we changed the structure of our churches where every door leads to relational environments where people are living out the truth? 

General Session 5

JEFFERSON BETHKE – @JeffersonBethke
Why Rhythms and Story Can Save Your Marriage and Family

What does it look like to live in Rhythm and Story? An identity given around a ritual.

We are what we worship.

Endless doing. Workaholics. Never a finish line until you die.

The biblical model of time
A spiral that goes forward.
God has a timeline but he also is a God of rhythm and cadence. A daily, weekly, yearly way.
Leads to progressive being. Identity centric. More and more formed into the image of Jesus.

When does the day actually start according to God? There was evening and morning the first day. Starts form the position of rest. Then once we are rested we can go work.

We were actually created to submit to sessions. You will flourish best when you submit to rest.

The American idea is to never be limited by anything ever. God operates differently and wants us to submit.

Amish people live in a daily, weekly, and yearly cadence.
Centers the songs, stories, and truth in the home. Usually read by a parent at the table, unpacking their identity ritualistically over a meal. What is the retention rate of the Amish household? How likely they will remain Amish? 95-97%.

Jewish retention is 95%.

Barna for evangelicals. The highest number 37%. 11% are resilient disciples.

What’s different about these different people groups?

Rituals give you an identity and you usually don’t leave an identity.

Evangelical Holiest Holidays: Christmas and Easter. A big event, a lot of people, and one person on stage.

Highest Holiest Moments in the Jewish Community: Passover and other events that happen at home around the dinner table where someone shares a story and they eat.

7 Billion total people and 15 million Jewish. .2% of the population. Nobel Prize 30%. Pulitzer 25%. Patient files 50%.

When you’re told from age zero identity wrapped in ritual it creates retention.

What would it look like if we as church leaders equipped people to center their homes to be the disciple-making machine? We can be an enormous helping tool but the family is where it happens.

Daily. Breakfast Benediction.
Put your hands up as and receive.
“I’m not what I do. I’m not what I have. I’m not what other people say about me. I am the beloved of God. It’s who I am. No one can take it from me. I don’t have to worry. I don’t have to hurry. I can trust my friend Jesus. And share His love with the world.”
Give them mm’s and this ritual will change their life forever. 25 seconds every day.

Weekly. The Steak
What is something you’re trying to make the high point moment of every week? Usually something individualistic. If you’re married the peek moment should be with the family as a deeply ritualistic shaping device.
Shabbat
Sabbath is not our burnout recovery day.
2 candles: Cease and Celebrate
You are not what you do if you believe it prove it one day a week. Do you really believe God has it?
Delight. Get out the nice china. Drink the best wine. Joy and delight. What would it look like if every 7 days you threw a party for your family or your marriage?
A day of intentional rest and celebration.
A day of the work is done. Enjoy and be blessed.

Yearly. Family Summit
Lev 23. Crafted holidays to create a story. You were once this, now you’re this. Identity.
Every year at the end of the year think about your family as more important than a business. There are yearly meetings. They do new product. They evaluate. What will 2020 be for my marriage? Does he have a word for us this year? Does he have a practice for us this year? Identity Shaping Rituals.

American Secular Cultural Holidays: Apple. We are ritualistic creatures. We look at our phones first thing every day. Yearly they have their Sept event. Keynote and new iPhone.

On the last day of Jesus, He gathers His disciples for a meal. He tells a story at a table. He makes it a rhythm and tells them to do it when they gather.

KANDI GALLATY – @KandiGallaty
Leading By Example: How Being a Disciple Helps Us Disciple Our Families

Our kids learn everything they do by watching us.

Being a disciple is a lifestyle; it’s not something you turn on and off.

What’s truly important is us leading ourselves well. And if we lead ourselves well, we will be able to lead others well.

2 Timothy 3:14-17
“But as for you, continue in what you have learned and have become convinced of, because you know those from whom you learned it, and how from infancy you have known the Holy Scriptures, which are able to make you wise for salvation through faith in Christ Jesus. All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness, so that the servant of God may be thoroughly equipped for every good work.”

A parent needs to be intentional in the investment of his or her family.

2 Timothy 1:5
I am reminded of your sincere faith, which first lived in your grandmother Lois and in your mother Eunice and, I am persuaded, now lives in you also.”

An abiding presence that dwelt in them at all times.

Acts 16:1
Paul came to Derbe and then to Lystra, where a disciple named Timothy lived, whose mother was Jewish and a believer but whose father was a Greek.

He was already a disciple when Paul met him, most likely because of his mother and grandmother.

Car Ride: Never get out of the car without a prayer. Healthy, safe, and a happy day. Maximize the time you have with them. Set the pace for their day.

Meal Time – it doesn’t have to look like a traditional big family meal but it needs to be a priority.

Bed Time – no kids want to go to bed.

Family Game Time – everything else can wait and we can spend time with the family.

Time equals transparency. Time spent now means they will open up to us later. We want to be intentional with them now so it will matter to them when they are older.

As a parent, you are your kids greatest advocate.

Don’t treat your Bible like it’s a keepsake box. Open it and spend time with Jesus.

25% of church-going Christians read the Bible. Of the 25% who read only read 8 books of the Bible.

Idle time becomes idol time.

We just need to be with Jesus, to be changed and become more like Him.

H.E.A.R. formula bible journaling: Highlight, Explain, Apply, and Respond.

Discipleship is a lifestyle.

Matthew 28:18b-20
“All authority in heaven and on earth has been given to me. Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age.”

Breakout Notes from #D62019

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Breakout 1 – Jim Wideman – @jimwideman

Reaching The Kids That Live At Your House

Work hard at making the Gospel fun in the church AND work hard at making Christianity fun in the home. 

1. I am so thankful that God called me into the ministry & particularly to Kids & Family Ministry.

2. I’m also thankful God called me to be Julie’s Husband, Yancy & Whitney’s Dad, Cory & Nigel’s Father-in-love, & Sparrow & Rhythm’s G.

3. It matters to God how you manage your ministry & your family. Your kids are your greatest ministry. 

 1. Too many ministers are married to the church and date their family. I believe it’s important to be married to your family and date the church.

 2. My family is 2nd on my priority list, 1st is my relationship with Christ. 

 3. My ministry is priorities 3, 4, & 5

 •My pastors’ problems

 •The level of leadership directly under me 

 •Everything else about ministry

4. When it comes to reaching the kids that live at your house as well as the kids at your church, “What happens at home is more important than what happens at church.”

5. Deuteronomy 6: 6-7 “These commandments that I give you today are to be upon your hearts. Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up.” Impress means intentional. Don’t be more intentional at church than you are at work. Be married to your family and date the church, not the other way around. 

6. Let your family be your greatest sermon (If you aim at nothing you’ll hit it every time!) Make a list of things you want your family to be known for. 

7. 12 Things You Can Do To Connect With Your Kids For Life 

 1. Make Jesus the king of your house not just your heart

 1. Be the example of living the word they see (Father & Parent like God) 

 2. Let faith be caught not just taught

 3. Make Jesus an everyday part of your lives (Never did devotions)

 4. Use the tools you tell your church parents to use at your house

 5. Give them the Word and do not allow strongholds or attitudes to be formed  

 6. Model making choices based on the word & prayer

 7. Teach your children how to hear God’s voice

 8. Be a worshiper at home not just at church

 2. Love your spouse the way you want your children’s spouse to love them

 1. Adore your spouse

 2. Model love (Be kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another

 3. Whatever you did to win their affection is what you do to keep their affection

 3. Spend lots of time with your kids (at home & at church)

 1. Ephesians 5:15 Be very careful, then, how you live –not as unwise but as wise, making the most of every opportunity. 

 2. Master time management

 • Act like your time belongs to you

 • Live by Priorities

 • Make appointments by your priority

 • Evaluate how you spend your time (identify time wasters)

 • Know how many nights you are willing to work at the church. Block time off. Plan things with your family. 

 3. Making time for your family has to be a lifestyle choice (watch your nights) 

 1. Daily

 • In-person

 • On the phone (FaceTime) 

 2. Weekly

 • Dates

 • Rituals (Saturday/ Sunday Lunches)

 • Family Outings

 • Include your kids on errands 

 • Make time off fun

 3. Special Times

 • Events and happenings they choose 

 • Events and happenings you choose

 4. Be consistent in your discipline

 1. The keyword is consistent

 2. Correct tell why

 3. Punish (different ways with different kids and at different ages) AND reward them when you catch them doing right!  

 4. Pray with them

 5. Hug them, tell them you love them 

 6. Move on

 5. Seek to understand how God has made each of your children & grandchildren differently and allow them to be different (Personality test help)

 • Different is good!

 • Teach them to serve  

 • Teach them to work

 6. Find each of your children’s natural giftings and bends and encourage them in it.

 Identify God’s call & purpose

 • Proverbs 22:6 Train a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it

 • Encourage- to inspire with courage, spirit, or hope. To spur on; to give help to

 7. Learn about their world, their interest, their music, their styles. When you care about their interests they’ll care about yours. 

 “Because I take the time to ask Fortnite questions to my grandson, he asks me questions about the Bible.” 

 • Be truly interested

 • Dare to learn about what they like

 • Be all in

 8. Admit your mistakes. When you’re wrong make corrections. (Ask for their forgiveness) Ask them to pray for you. There’s a huge difference between I’m sorry and Godly repentance. 

 9. Talk to your children about everything. Be open and honest. 

 (Establish an open-door policy early)

 • Talk about your mistakes and temptations. Have you ever noticed that the devil attacks family the same way? Prepare them. 

 • If the devil tempted you in an area, you can rest assured he’s going to tempt them in the same area

 • Don’t overreact when they express views that are different or wrong.

 (Don’t freak out)

 • Don’t forget what it was like to be their age

 10. Make their friends welcome in your home 

 • Include them in your time with your kids 

 • Invest in your kids’ friends

 11. Don’t open the door for rebellion in your children by rebelling against authorities in your lives

 • Always side with authority

 • Children are masters of managed information 

 • Never lie to your children about anything

 • If this has been an issue, repent.

 12. Don’t exasperate your children

 • Ephesians 6:4 “Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord. 

 • What does exasperate mean?

 1). to excite or inflame the anger of: enrage 

 2). to cause irritation or annoyance to 

 1. Don’t forget what it was like to be a teen

 2. Set boundaries and let them earn your trust (check up on them, but be fair) 

 3. Let the punishment fit the crime

 4. Don’t put unrealistic expectations on your kids

 5. Don’t have one set of rules for them & another for yourself

8. It’s never too late to make the right choices

 If you’re not dating your spouse, you need to be.

 Whatever you did to win your spouse’s affection, continue it today!

 Let her know there is no one you love more than her, including the church. 

 If your pastor wants the church to be a priority over your family, you’re working for the wrong church. 

 1. We serve a God who is the God of a second chance 

 2. Where do you need to make changes?

 3. Let’s pray

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Breakout 2 – Jim Wideman – @jimwideman 

Resourcing Grandparents To Pass Their Faith To the Next Generation

Very few churches have a ministry to grandparents or mobilize grandparents. This is a mission field.

1. Thanks/ notes/ Intro family/ Whose in the room?

2. Many churches today focus on 1 generation

 1. God of Abraham, Isaac, & Jacob

 2. Multigenerational ministry – This makes the church balanced. 

 3. Every generation can be influenced by each other

3. More grandparents are living on the earth than at any other time in history

4. What do we know about being a grandparent? 

 1. It’s more than wonderful

 2. Grandkids are better than your kids

 3. It’s the reward for not killing the first bunch 

 4. You can send them home when you get tired

 Love your grandkids by giving them the same rules at your house as they have at their parent’s house. 

5. Grandparent ministry today offers the same opportunities and potential that children’s ministry did when I started over 40 years ago.

 1. More than 70 million grandparents currently in the U.S.

 2. Only 30 million indicate attending church (43%)

 3. There are 108.7 million people 50 years old & above in the U.S.

6. Fun facts that you may not know from AARP’s latest report 

 1. About one-third of all adults are grandparents.

   2. The average age of becoming a grandparent is around 47.

 3. The average age of grandparents is around 64.

 4. The average grandparent has six grandchildren

 5. About 77% of grandparents are married.

 6. About half are still working.

 7. A slight majority, 54%, have at least some college education.

 8. About 6% of grandparents have a grandchild living in their home.

 9. Parents are not present in around 43% of those homes, a phenomenon known as a skip-generation family. How is your church helping grandparents who are the primary caretaker for kids? Help with childcare, car clinics, date nights, back to school events. 

 10. About 15 % provide regular childcare for grandchildren in their homes.

 11. More than half of grandparents help with grandchildren’s educational expenses.

  12. A little less than half of the grandparents help with grandchildren’s living expenses.

  13. A quarter of grandparents help pay for medical or dental care for their grandchildren.

 14. More than half of all grandparents believe they play a very important role in their grandchildren’s lives. What if we could change this to 100% by letting them know?

 7. Grandparents Matter

  1. Grandparents are incredibly important to their grandkids.

 2. Grandparents are uniquely positioned to spiritually influence their grandkids.

 3. Grandparents have a Biblical mandate to do so.

 4. Have you ever wondered why God designed for the family to have 2 parents & 4 grandparents? Maybe parents really do need more support? What would happen if the church can come alongside grandparents and grad-friends to help bear this burden? 

8. If God designed the role of Parent & Grandparent what was His purpose?

  1. Deuteronomy 6:1-7 These are the commands, decrees and laws the Lord your God directed me to teach you to observe in the land that you are crossing the Jordan to possess, 2 so that you, your children and their children after them may fear the Lord your God as long as you live by keeping all his decrees and commands that I give you, and so that you may enjoy long life. 3 Hear, Israel, and be careful to obey so that it may go well with you and that you may increase greatly in a land flowing with milk and honey, just as the Lord, the God of your ancestors, promised you. 4 Hear, O Israel: The Lord our God, the Lord is one. 5 Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength. 6 These commandments that I give you today are to be on your hearts. 7 Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up.

  2. Deuteronomy 4:9 “Only be careful, and watch yourselves closely so that you do not forget the things your eyes have seen or let them fade from your heart as long as you live. Teach them to your children and to their children after them.”

  3. Have you ever thought that the purpose of every Jewish celebration, Holiday and Feast day can be summed up in one thing; “Remember what the Lord has done, and teach it to your children.”

 All Jewish Holidays & Feasts can be summed up in one thing “Remember what I’ve done & teach it to your children!”

 Write down God stories on the back of pictures or else those memories and God stories will be gone when grandparents pass away. Pass those God stories on. If you don’t get intentional then your whole families Biblical history can be lost with the passing of the patriarchs. 

 9. Grandparents must be intentional to pass on their family’s God Story to future generations! (Sparrow & Rhythm’s story) 

 10. The Church & Home have a Grand partner and it’s time that we invite them to the conversation.

 11. Service is over but church is not…

 (Why do parents & grandparents want better for their children in every area except spiritual things?)

 12. We must recalibrate how the church & the homework together

 1. Old model: The church teaches & the home reinforce.

  2. New model: The home teaches & the church reinforce.

In the Family Ministry Movement, we talk a lot about partnering with parents but what if we realized the Church & the Home have another partner…Grandparents? 

Service is over, church is not. 

13. We must recalibrate Grandparenting

 1. Old model: Spoil, send home all hyped up, my house, my rules.

 2. New model: Train, all in, partner, same rules, transfer faith.

14. How do we start the recalibration process within the church?

 1. Start the conversations…

 2. Encourage mentoring, seek out Grandfriends…

 3. Start a small group or Sunday School Class

 4. Offer Grandparenting classes. (Close/Distance)

 5. Offer technology training (involve the youth)

 6. Include Grandparents in child dedications…

 7. Offer multigenerational events church-wide

 8. Offer Grandparent events & activities

 9. Present Grandparents Bibles to pass on…

 10. Throw first-time Grandparents a Baby Shower

 11. Encourage older adults in serving in kids & youth

 12. Join the Legacy Coalition! (www.legacycoalition.com)

15. Deuteronomy 4:9 Only be careful, and watch yourselves closely so that you do not forget the things your eyes have seen or let them fade from your heart as long as you live. Teach them to your children and to their children after them.

16. BE INTENTIONAL AT CHURCH & HOME!

Write down your own God story. 

Start conversations with your church and let this be part of the partnering verbiage that comes from your pulpit. 

We as the church pass on the faith and make disciples. 

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Breakout 3 – Lena Wooten – @Lena_W

Developing a Thriving Family Ministry

1/168 – If we are lucky families are in church 1 hour of the 168 hour week. What are we doing to make disciples during the other 167 hours? 

1. Integrated Family Curriculum 

Birth through Grandparenting. 

 D6, Orange, David C. Cook, LifeWay, and others. 

2. Email and Social Media

D6 Family App is a great resource for families. Family Fun Questions. 

Splink: Spiritual Linking. Help families spiritually link to each other regardless of their age. A free resource to start spiritual conversations. 

3. Family Events

InstaHunt – Instagram Scavenger Hunt. Gave papers after church with things for the family to go do and post. Take items and spell out your families last name. Reenact a scene from frozen, etc. Use the church hashtag. Gather at 5:00 and eat ice cream where the photos shared based on a hashtag on the screen. 

Gingerbread House Making Party – at a local elementary gathered empty milk cartons for the base of the house. Gram crackers, icings, candy, and let kids sit with their families to decorate the houses. 

Family Camp Out – at the church on a Saturday Night. Smores, hot dogs, and then go into church together smelling like a campfire. 

4. Devotionals

Share the Bible App Devotionals. 

52 Creative Family Time Devotions – 1 a week for a year and things around the house that can be done in under 5 minutes. 

5. D6+

Being pulled in so many directions is torture. 

Ministry is full of Discipleship, vision, lessons, leaders, events, budgets, stages, small groups, volunteers, meetings, teaching, curriculum, supplies, etc… What if there were resources to help you? Pain points for parents. 

Volunteer Training – Give the info and then in the P.S. include a quick info tip they need to see. 

Parent toolboxes being printed in snail mail. Magnet sent to the family as a reminder for spiritual conversations. 

Your volunteers are ministers, not babysitters. Communicate this to them and help them buy into the value of this position. 

6. Parenting Seminar

Right Now Media has resources if you are not able to bring someone in. 

FamJam – Sunday after church. Lunch provided. Jim Wideman and Dr. Ron Hunter came in to teach. Free event. Children’s classes covered by teenagers who made money. 45 minutes each and workshops by people in the church. Marriage, preschool, young adults, etc.  

7. Parenting Resource Hub

An area in the church for parents to find recourses. 

Creating a Parenting Resource Center in Your Church on a Budget – https://d6family.com/creating-a-parenting-resource-center-in-your-church-on-a-budget/ 

8. Family Fun Nights

Give a giant list of ideas: 

Have a family devotional

Game night

Build a snowman

Pack a picnic

Go on a family bike ride

Fly a kite

Make a bird feeder

Watch old home movies

Hang out around the fire-pit

Read a book together

Pull out sleeping bags and have an indoor campout

Roast marshmallows in your fireplace and make s’mores

Throwball in the back yard

Have a Nerf battle

Go ice skating

Shoot some hoops

Have a dance party

Pitch a tent in your back yard

Make a fort in your living room

Draw a family portrait

Paint a picture to hang in your home

Play hide and seek

Make homemade ice cream

Have an outdoor movie night

Go to Goodwill and pick out an outfit for each other to wear

Make play dough creations

Go on a hike

Play four square

Do a puzzle

Try Geocaching

Make a time capsule

Watch the sunset

Have a craft night

Look at family photo albums together

Make your own pizza night

Go swimming

Have a lip sync battle

Write letters to each other

Plant a garden

Make a meal for someone who is sick

Play charades

Play Frisbee together

Create sidewalk chalk masterpieces

Go stargazing

Make a craft from Pinterest together

Go bowling

You do not have to be a parent to disciple children.  

 

Breakout 4 – Michayla White – @michaylawhite

Developing Spiritual Practices in Children 

Michayla’s Calling: Shape the future of the Church by connecting leaders who serve kids and families to what they need. 

Key factors for spiritual formation. 

Foundations for Discipleship of Children 

What happens when a child comes to faith in Jesus? 

 New Creation – The old has passed away, the new has come! They have been given righteousness through faith in Jesus Christ. 

Coheirs with Christ – Sons, daughters, with full rights of a natural heir.

Peace with God – They have peace with the Holy God of the universe through His blameless son, Jesus Christ.

The indwelling of the Holy Spirit – God’s love has been poured into their hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to them. 

Spiritual Gifts – They have spiritual gifts to share with the Body as evidence of God’s grace to all of us. 

Conquerors – They are more than conquerors through Him who loves them. 

Prepared in Advance to Bring Him glory – Before the foundations of the earth was laid, they were prepared for the glory of the Lord!

Fellow Disciples – When a child comes to Jesus, they are welcomed by God and are fellow disciples with us. 

Romans 11:33-36

Oh, the depth of the riches of the wisdom and knowledge of God! How unsearchable his judgments, and his paths beyond tracing out! “Who has known the mind of the Lord? Or who has been his counselor?” “Who has ever given to God, that God should repay them?” For from him and through him and for him are all things. To him be the glory forever! Amen.

The proper response to the Gospel is praise. 

Do they really understand what they’re doing? 

 This is His work we are invited to participate in. 

“Faith comes by hearing, and hearing by the Word of God.” Romans 10:17

If a child is truly trusting in Christ, his fruit will be evident over time. 

Passing on the knowledge of God is a community mandate to all believers. 

What does it look like for us to nurture thriving relationships with Jesus? 

If we are not careful, we can unwittingly pass on facts to our kids, and fail to pass on faith.

Romans 8: 27-29

“And he who searches our hearts knows the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for God’s people in accordance with the will of God. And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose. For those God foreknew he also predestined to be conformed to the image of his Son, that he might be the firstborn among many brothers and sisters.”

Mark 12:28-31

One of the teachers of the law came and heard them debating. Noticing that Jesus had given them a good answer, he asked him, “Of all the commandments, which is the most important?” “The most important one,” answered Jesus, “is this: ‘Hear, O Israel: The Lord our God, the Lord is one. Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength.’ The second is this: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ There is no commandment greater than these.”

“Christian spiritual formation for children is the lifelong process by which the Holy Spirit serves as the child’s teacher, deepening the child’s relationship with God, transforming the child into Christlikeness, generating an overflow of love toward God and others.”

From Kidz At Heart Intl. 

The fruit of Christian spiritual formation for kids is Christlikeness and this can coincide with their development. 

The child’s view of God is started at conception. 

Psalm 51:6 “Yet you desired faithfulness even in the womb; you taught me wisdom in that secret place.”

Psalm 139:13-14

“For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.”

Knowledge isn’t necessarily sufficient evidence of spiritual health. Are you growing in love for God and others? 

Know God’s story – Follow his instructions

We demonstrate spiritual formation. 

This is a whole lifelong process. We are formed every day, either spiritually or not. 

We are drawn to the way of Jesus or we are drawn another way. 

The world and the enemy is actively opposed to the Christian spiritual formation of children…It desires to create a spiritual life that is asleep or directly opposed to the hope and love and intimacy of Jesus.

The Kingdom of God needs to be their worldview-not the temporary, fleeting, empty narrative of the world; but the eternal, satisfying, and FULL narrative of the gospel. 

Who God is, who we are, and the extent Jesus took to bring us back to Him. 

Relationships 

A demonstration of balance on one foot and being knocked over. Then being protected. Then being surrounded. With an even bigger circle, there was more protection. What did you see going on here? Everyone in the community brings the best opportunity to stay standing. Healthy relationships. Adults can only take children where they are going themselves. A side by side journey together. 

Believing the right things and doing the right things vs. falling in love with Jesus. 

If you are in love with Jesus how did that happen? What’s your story? What made the difference for you? Communication, time, presence, sacrifice, mercy, forgiveness. The same things that grew your relationship with your spouse. 

Environments and Experience

The pace of life is a big issue today. Over-scheduled. They need models that show the pace of a disciple. Evaluate the pace of our home and maybe even Sunday morning. Focused or distracting environments. Learning requires us to create an environment but making space for children to connect with God is another thing entirely. 

Biblical Literacy

Utilize multiple intelligence. 

Include the Holy Spirit as teacher and trust Him. What if we invited the children to listen to God more than to us? 

Allow the Holy Spirit to help the child to make connections. 

What is discipleship? 

Emulation – A disciple’s actions were expected to be consonant with his rabbi. 

Diligence – Diligent in observing, diligent in learning from, and consistent in practicing what their rabbi practiced. 

Much more than feeling and much more than a set of actions, it was a commitment to look like Him and walk like Him. 

Scripture – reading or hearing and trusting the God-breathed words of Scripture as our guide and source for life. 

Matthew 4:4

Jesus answered, “It is written: ‘Man shall not live on bread alone, but on every word that comes from the mouth of God.

Hebrews 4:12

For the word of God is alive and active. Sharper than any double-edged sword, it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow; it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart.

We need to make sure that they see how much we love the Word and that we love taking the time to read it. Make sure there are age-appropriate Bibles in the house. 

Ask: Did God ask you to do something. Invite their response to that scripture. 

Ask: What do you think you should do having heard that scripture? Internalize the word. 

At church help them by encouraging their imagination and act it out. Don’t micromanage this part. 

Say, imagine what it would be like to _____. Get them to wonder why. Encourage curiosity. Don’t be afraid if things don’t go as planned. 

Small groups where they read the passage together. Slow them down in their pace of reading through the scripture. Have them repeat it multiple times. It’s not how much of the scripture we can get through but how much of the scripture is getting through to them. 

Prayer – hang continual conversations with God. 

Mark 14:35-36, 39

Going a little farther, he fell to the ground and prayed that if possible the hour might pass from him. “Abba, Father,” he said, “everything is possible for you. Take this cup from me. Yet not what I will, but what you will.” Once more he went away and prayed the same thing.

John 11:1-13 Lazarus

Draw pictures of those who you want to remember to pray for. 

Writers can start prayer journals 

You can go on a prayer walk as a family. Point those things out. Ask the kids to point them out. 

Fill in the blank prayer is a great practice. “Today I want to thank God for _______.” Today, God I am worried about _______. Today God I wonder about _______. 

Worship – declaring the greatness of the Father and demonstrating love for the King.

John 4:23

Yet a time is coming and has now come when the true worshipers will worship the Father in the Spirit and in truth, for they are the kind of worshipers the Father seeks.

Matthew 26:30

“When they had sung a hymn, they went out to the Mount of Olives.”

Mark 14:26

More than just singing, is there anything you see about how great God is. Worship is public and private. When you realize there is something you are thankful with God about, name it there. 

Ask: What did you notice about God today? 

Break up worship at your church. Worship response station. A blessing station with printed promises of God. Pull one, read it, and ask how it makes you feel about God. 

Service – overflowing with His love and compassion to others in the form of action especially those in need. 

Mark 9:35

Mark 10:44-45

This doesn’t work unless you are modeling it first. If our hearts aren’t overflowing it will be impossible to model and it’s a costly habit in that it requires us to give up ourselves. 

Let one another go first. Give someone else the bigger cookie. 

Not just the behavior but talk them through the why and how it connects to their hearts. 

Serve in the community and in the church. 

Sharing the Gospel – sharing the gift of the gospel generally in the power of the Spirit. 

John 20:21

Matthew 28:16-20

Are you making time for people? 

 Are you inviting your neighbors into their house?

Are you looking people in the eye when ordering food? 

 Encourage your kids to smile at people. Ask your kids to help you see people. Pray together to see what God wants us to see. Team up in sharing the Gospel. 

What hope do you have now for the future now that you believe in Jesus? 

Think about kids they know that do not know Jesus. Ask God to help them share that love. 

How are we as a whole changed by the presence and participation of children in the discipleship journey? 

“Teaching and passing on faith to children strengthens the faith of adults. Keeping our focus on God, enjoying and serving the Lord with our children takes intentional diligence…especially in a culture of ease. The needed diligence is filed by the depth of our commitment to Him and the depth of the commitment that we will together be people that passes on faith to our children.” Scottie May

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The Belonging Co Conference Notes #TBCOconference

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Leadership Co Notes

Henry Seeley 

It’s less about information and more about Importation. What does God want to do in our hearts? Digest this spiritually. 

Not following a list of rules or guidelines from someone else’s growth. This leads to insecure leaders. Imitate another model or blueprint. What God has done here might not work there. 

Churches in Nashville met on Sunday morning but there were a group of musicians that are gone on the weekend and need a new model. The thing that agitates you is the thing you’re often anointed for. You see that it needs to change and can change. The greatest ministry comes at the greatest cost. If you want to do something significant in the kingdom of God there is a cost. The cost is everything. You can’t have the fruit without the cost. You wouldn’t know what to do with the fruit. What people do with free stuff, they view it as worthless. 

Social media can be the absolute best and worst for us. We ask, “How do we make what we have, look like what they have?” This leads to an empty shell. What if instead we press into God and see what He has for us! Be secure in who you are and what God has called you to or else you’ll spend your life trying to live up to another person’s expectations. 

The church has operated out of insecurity. You’ll never dictate culture if you’re too busy trying to imitate it. The church try’s to do a church version of the world. We have the presence of God and the world is missing it. Why would I show up when there is something better somewhere else? Because of the presence of God. 

Don’t be afraid of doing things well. Express worship through your gifts. If the Holy Spirit says thank you for your preparation but I’m going this way. The team needs to be prepared to be u prepared. The end goal is not a service time or creative element the end goal is tuning into what God wants to do. Don’t let your plan get in the way of His presence. Don’t be offended if Holy Spirit takes the service another direction. It’s not your time. The most important thing you can do is to make space for the presence of God. 

The method is getting on your face before God. The method is in the secret place where the Spirit speaks. If you’re not dealing with your insecurities you aren’t secure enough to follow the presence of God. Your security doesn’t line in your notes. If you’re insecure and believe your security is where you lead the song then you won’t be secure enough to step into what you’re really called for. No one realizes they have insecurities. There are things God wants to do with each of us. Insecurity is a thief that will rob from you. Rob your joy, your relationships, your calling. What if we were so secure we realized we didn’t build the church but God built the church. Insecure leaders build empires, secure leaders build the kingdom. 

You are never elevated beyond serving. Jesus whole goal was to serve. Jesus didn’t talk leadership but being a servant. When we feel elevated beyond the people and do not serve the people we hurt the church. If I don’t show up to serve then I’ve lost Jesus. Have people around us who are not yes people or insecure but can come to us and point out what they are seeing. You can’t be the best leader in isolation. What sucks about this is you have to be vulnerable. The grace of God is evident in our lives when we allow others to speak into our lives. Not leading from top-down but arm in arm. No one’s position is less or greater. We understand the mandate in the position and confidently link arms and march forward. What if we realized our mandate was to build the kingdom? If someone leaves our church that’s not a backward step. 

Secure leaders know how to deal with offense and disappointment. How you deal with this will make the difference. What do you do when you have a Judas in your midst? Do you shove them out? Jesus never changed His posture with Judas. When you feel betrayed realize Jesus never shunned Judas, He invited him to the table. Jesus never lost sight of His calling and the opportunity to be brought close. There was always grace available, even to the last point. Do you spend your energy and focus on the one or two and lose sight of what you’re really called to be doing? Be a leader who knows how to love even when you’ve been offended. 

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Alex Seeley

We have a generation coming who has a growing disdain for the church. The primary wound in our society is rejection. They feel already rejected. Identity crisis is taking place. We can not do church how we always have. Jesus is the cornerstone. The essence of a pure Gospel is love. Known as disciples if we love. Love those who are resistant to our love. Love those who oppose you. Love beyond the betrayal. Love unconditionally. It’s easy to love those who are easy to love. It’s easy to love those who serve you. 

This next generation is looking for a virtual un-church. Done with coming in to receive just formation. They are done with cleaning up to be accepted. What they want is the truth in love, to call them up to what God has called them to be. Not a seeker-sensitive church but a church that attracts seekers by offering living water. Not a motivational speech but a transformation in the Holy Spirit that breaks addictions and causes transformation. 

We are in a spiritual battlefield and you need to understand what the battle looks like in your town. Don’t practice a relationship with Holy Spirit on the stage, meet Him in the quiet place. The ministry is not to build your name or platform or even to do what you feel called to do. It’s not to behave and then you can belong. True love says you have a place at the table before you believe or before you behave. 

The antidote to rejection is love. Jesus attracted every sphere of influence because His love source came from God. Have a full revelation of His love. Rejection begets more rejection. Jesus lived without agenda or need to be loved. 

This agape love that is the antidote to rejection is not encountered through intellectual or motivation but the power of the Holy Spirit and experienced in presence. 

You carry a 3 part of the Holy Spirit: Presence, Power and the Prophetic. 

Miracles, Signs, and Wonders. 

The mega-church without God’s spirit: It’s very interesting to see what man can build. 

Bring the presence of the Almighty Jesus. Not satisfied with a good program unless someone is set free and delivered. I don’t know what it is but I sense his presence. Break fear and addiction. 

Know what it is to encounter the presence of God. Not just extra songs because we try to manufacture presence. You can have His presence without the music even starting. It’s the presence you are carrying. 

Power of God moves where you can’t take credit. 

Presence is getting out of the way and following the movement of God. 

People don’t want to be entertained, they want to go home different. This is not about me providing your breakthrough but giving God time to breakthrough each individual. My words are nothing. 

Not the love for what I have to share or the love for our program but a love for the people. 

The world needs to see the opposite of what it’s currently seeing. Love those who curse you. Go the extra mile. Flip what is expected. Jesus was able to love beyond everything because He didn’t entrust everyone with His heart but He gave His full heart to God. It doesn’t say to entrust one another but to love. Love beyond the betrayal. Love even when it costs you. Do you want to be right or in right relationship? Jesus didn’t have to prove Himself. Jesus didn’t even bring his best friend, John, into the offense by talking about Judas. Love covers even when you’re going to be betrayed. The disciples didn’t know who was the betrayer because Jesus never brought anyone into that offense. Jesus loves fully. His love is pure. He called Peter to build the church and even after the offense and betrayal, He redeems. Though my trust was broken, Jesus love is so much stronger than the broken relationship. 

So why are we so hard on our people? We are called to love beyond. We can shift a generation from being offended to a saint who is called to die for the cause of Christ. Are we building churches that are prepared for persecution? You don’t die for someone you are just being entertained by. 

Q&A 

Paul Bergin

Banning Liebscher – Jesus Culture Founder 

What’s the biggest issue in the church? 

Wrong definition of success. It’s not a number but the presence of God. Creating structures that crest immature believers. American consumerism crept into the church to make things as easy as possible. Businesses eliminate struggle to gain business. When you’re a leader with insecurity you need people to show up for you to feel better. When you remove the struggle you create immature believers. There is a struggle involved in the community. 

What are we doing to respond to this struggle?

Jesus called us to lay down our lives. We are not preparing our church for persecution. We are raising children who don’t understand discipline and how to wait and therefore are offended by everything. Butterfly analogy of opening the cocoon. It will look good but it won’t fulfill its calling. The goal is growing mature people that become a large church in Jesus name. 

What would you tell your 20-year-old self?

Be more patient and not look for greener grass. When you extract yourself from something difficult you lose an opportunity for refinement. 

Slow down and focus on internal health. Make sure what’s driving you is actually healthy. 

Know when you are in a preparation session. A season of refinement. Don’t short circuit the refinement process. The enemy will take you out. 

The goal is the journey, not the destination. Have joy in the journey. Don’t keep yourself busy with the excuse of ministry. 

There’s a difference between Anointing over your life. Word over your life. Authority or appointed over your life. David has to wait. 

Meet with your team to encourage. People generally know their mistakes and failures. Atop and celebrate what God is doing. You’re worth more than what you can do here. Your value doesn’t come through your efforts. Excellence is not perfectionism. It’s giving your best to God. You’re thinking too highly of yourself if you think your successes will build the church. 

When the church is a polished performance people either see right through it or they don’t relate. 

Life is but an interruption of eternity. 

When kids are little they will jump over hurdles to get to you but when they grow up they will rarely put in the effort. 

Do your kids know they can interrupt at any point because they are more important than a ministry. 

Advice for planning a church?

Enjoy the journey. Look fondly in this season. Focus on building a culture more than a crowd. Ask, would you go to this if you weren’t leading this? Build what you would like to attend. Core values. Authenticity. Presence. You have to build a community. Be okay with unmet needs. Deep value in maturing believers. Find identity in Jesus. Fully engaged and fully alive in their calling. 

In most church planing models the launch date is the goal. You’ve got a whole life ahead to be looking forward to. 

If you have to build X ministry so people won’t leave then you’re building the church for people and not for God. 

What are you doing to engage the broader city? 

Build people. If the individual is equipped and ready then what comes out of them will engage the city. You contribute to the family you lead in the city. What’s in the hearts of your people? 

How does the church deal with people in the church who deal with homosexuality? 

Everyone is welcome in the house of God. We preach the truth to all. We don’t preach on a single sin but on bringing Jesus into the room. Jesus let the rich young ruler make the decision and didn’t chase after him. He preached the truth in love. Let the Holy Spirit do the work. 

We have a lot of grace for sins we understand but not sins that we don’t understand. This is set aside as the pet peeve sin. 

Complicated issue but not biblically complicated. Layers with laws being passed, people who don’t take the word as the final authority, people in the church who don’t think you’re correct in theology, and people experimenting. You need to know who you’re talking with. Do you allow people to serve who struggle with sin? Restore the identity of Christ. Stop identifying people by their sin. Gluten. Liar. Etc. battle in identity. Stop labeling stop identifying and love people. 

How do you seek God in the secret place? 

Drive, worship, pray. The word of God. Open the word and keep reading until God speaks. 

Constant dialog all day with Holy Spirit. Times of intercession prayer. Reading the Word. 

It’s a relationship. Some relationships are very structured and others are more rigid. You need to be coming to the Lord in this season. 

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Release of Awe and Wonder tonight!

Banning Liebscher

Prayer for Natalie – Prophet of Hope 

1 Samuel 1

God has plans and purposes for your life, for your family, for your city, for your church, and for your sphere of influence. He invites you to partner with Him to see that happen. You are most fully alive in that partnership. 

God speaks a word to Hannah. Everything changed for her. It brought her to a place of faith. God plants a seed. He wants to get us to a place of faith. John 15:7 abide in Christ and His words abide in you. Draw close to Jesus and have His words abide. 

There’s a difference between hearing a word and listening to a word. Allowing the word to abide in you. 

Pregnancy test illustration. That second line changes everything. When the word of the Lord comes it changes everything. In the natural, ready or not the baby is coming. In the spiritual side, you need to learn how to carry the word of the Lord. You need to abide and nurture the word. 

You don’t need a fresh word you need to know what to do with the one you’ve got. When you begin to learn to carry the word, faith begins to manifest in your life. 

Big bucks!

His word comes not just to encourage but to ignite the faith inside of us. Faith looks like something. 

Faith manifests in preparation. 

In the church, we complicate things Jesus made simple. Simple and homespun. By faith, Noah prepared an ark. Hebrews 11. When the Lord speaks to you, your life will be different afterward. When the Lord speaks to you, it should cause you to prepare if you believe Him. If someone says they are coming over we believe them and prepare. We believe people more than we believe in God. A lack of preparation communicates a lack of value. 

The widow and Elisha. Oil and a jar. 2 Kings 4:5-6. There is not another vessel so the oil stopped. The principle, not a law. The level of outpouring in your life is linked to your preparation. 

This is what your life should look like: Building arks and gathering vessels. If you hear a word about filling stadiums, start inviting people into your living room. Take a speaking class. What simple step can I do to prepare? 

Faith manifests in the proclamation. 

What comes out of your mouth matters. 

The power of life and death is in your tongue. How careless are you about what’s coming out of your mouth? 

Not scared but sober. To understand the power and responsibility. If you’re careless it can result in disaster. My words are either partnering with God and His plans and purposes or undermining God and His plans and purposes. 

An angel appears to Zachariah and out of his mouth unbelief comes. The angel mutes him for nine months. This isn’t a punishment but a help. 

Out of the heart, the mouth speaks. Sometimes the best thing you can do is go on mute. Unbelief is on your heart and coming out of your mouth. Unbelief is a belief in the wrong thing. Are you more connected with your circumstances than the word of the Lord?  

Faith is not acting like theirs not a mountain in front of us. Faith is saying there’s a greater reality than the mountain. There may be cancer but there’s a higher name than cancer. Connect my heart to the hire name than reality. There may be depression but there’s a hire name. This is why it’s so important to god His word in your heart. 

Are you Spirit-led or feelings led? You will be feelings led if your life is not anchored to scripture. 

What we do now, is put people in a Jesus time out. How’d it go…feelings? No, Jesus time out. What does Jesus say? 

When the word of the Lord comes you no longer have permission to say anything else. Have the discipline to stop talking when you’re not speaking His word. When God’s word is in your heart, it’s coming out of your heart. When His word is full in your heart your circumstances won’t dictate your heart. 

Shove so much word in your heart that when my life pulls up to the train stop and life tries to get in, there’s no room to get in. 

Is what’s coming out of my mouth circumstances, social media, toxic? Repent and stop allowing unbelief to come out of your heart. 

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Alex Seeley

God is not obligated to fulfill your potential. You have the responsibility to nurture the seed. 

“Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a huge crowd of witnesses to the life of faith, let us strip off every weight that slows us down, especially the sin that so easily trips us up. And let us run with endurance the race God has set before us. We do this by keeping our eyes on Jesus, the champion who initiates and perfects our faith. Because of the joy awaiting him, he endured the cross, disregarding its shame. Now he is seated in the place of honor beside God’s throne. Think of all the hostility he endured from sinful people; then you won’t become weary and give up.”

Hebrews 12:1-3 NLT

Don’t lose heart. Let Jesus do the work so we can be the person he called us to be. 

Will you finish like John or Judas?

C.S. Lewis — ‘For you will certainly carry out God’s purpose, however, you act, but it makes a difference to you whether you serve like Judas or like John.’ 

A saint is set apart. We talk differently and look differently. The enemy will try to hinder your call, to weight you down so you don’t finish the race. 

We let our heart grow calicos. We let our heart get tangled up in things of the world. 

King Saul and King David. Both appointed. Same spirit. Both start at the age of 30. Both have a kingdom for 49 years. The difference was their heart. The one who died with honor was David. The one who took himself out of the game was Saul. The difference was their heart. 

David was far from perfect but he did say he was sorry and repented. 

“Saul replied, “But I’m only from the tribe of Benjamin, the smallest tribe in Israel, and my family is the least important of all the families of that tribe! Why are you talking like this to me?” 1 Samuel 9:21 NLT

Saul felt disqualified. He saw himself small in his own eyes. God called him big. We must believe God and take Him at His word. When God calls us we must say, “Here I am Lord.”

We can not sustain the race with a one time encounter. We have to allow God to refine us into the likeness of Christ. 

“So they asked the Lord, “Where is he?” And the Lord replied, “He is hiding among the baggage.” So they found him and brought him out, and he stood head and shoulders above anyone else.” 1 Samuel 10:22-23 NLT

Saul was hiding behind his baggage. We need a generation that is resolved to know who they are in Christ. It doesn’t matter what your baggage is or how you feel on the inside. You must stand tall on both the inside and the outside. 

You can tell a person who carries themselves tall on the inside. God doesn’t need you a head taller on the outside. It’s not popularity. Insecurity is so prevalent in this next generation. God called you unique. God is waiting on you to arise. 

David was different. He was the 8th option. There’s one more but he’s just the youngest. There’s a reason for David to be insecure but he doesn’t come in with insecurity because of his anointing. David went back to being a shepherd because he didn’t need the title to define who he was. He was fully secure because his position in Christ is on the inside. 

David delivers sandwiches to his brothers. A secure heart just obeys. Not doing the work to be noticed but know who they are and what they are called to do. Whatever is asked of me, I will serve unto the Lord. 

Saul was given the title. 

“David left his things with the keeper of supplies and hurried out to the ranks to greet his brothers.” 1 Samuel 17:22 NLT

David left his baggage and ran to the battle lines marked out for him. David knew he was born to take down the enemy. He didn’t need a crown to act. He knew he was a king on the inside. 

We are all in a race. We give an account to God on what He called us to do. No excuses before God. I want to hear well done good and faithful SERVANT. Not well done good and faithful pastor or well done good and faithful king. 

You are in training now. We need to fight private battles before taking the stage. We want the spotlight without the testing. It’s for your good to fight private battles before public battles. Our confidence is in the Lord. It’s not arrogance to be confident in the things of God, it’s actually your responsibility. Arrogance is bent in insecurity but confidence is bathed in humility. 

So many of us waver on the opinion of man. You can listen to the option of man and shrink back or you can stand firm in God’s authority. 

The very thing you are called to do you will be attacked in. David’s brother attacked him. When you do what’s right in God’s eyes you will be attacked but when you are confident in your calling you move forward. David didn’t engage in the battle with his brother. That’s fighting the wrong battle. 

David remembered the victories of the past. Some of us remember what we should be forgetting and forget what we should be remembering. Remember when the word of the Lord is spoken. Prepare your heart. Remember God did it then and will do it again. I’m not a product of my sin, I’m a new creation and now I run the race. 

Saul saw the circumstances big. Insecurity begets insecurity and toxicity. A secure leader cheers people on because it brings glory to the Lord. 

You come with weapons of the world but I come in the name of God. No force on this earth is greater than God. Saul saw the problem and David saw God as the solution. We don’t fight with things of the world but with divine power to demolish strongholds. 

David knew how to repent. Saul only knew how to say I’ve sinned and I’m sorry. I’m sorry is when you accidentally bump someone in the elevator not when you have broken the heart of God. Repentance is the way to breakthrough. Godly sorrow that causes change. Sorry is in the moment. Look into someone’s eyes. When rebellion is in the heart they don’t look in your eyes. “Look in my eyes are their naughties in your heart.” Dear Jesus, I repent. Take the naughties out and put the good things in. Sorry is behavior modification. Sorry is a statement that doesn’t require a response. 

Godly sorry brings repentance that leads to salvation and no regret but worldly sorry brings death. 

Psalm 51:10-12

“Create in me a clean heart, O God. Renew a loyal spirit within me. Do not banish me from your presence, and don’t take your Holy Spirit from me. Restore to me the joy of your salvation, and make me willing to obey you.”

Living in perpetual rebellion took Saul out. God would rather your obedience than your sacrifice. Half obedience is disobedience. No shortcuts. Obedience increases your authority. 

When David was corrected he asked God for a new heart. He begged God please don’t take your presence because it’s the only thing sustaining me. 

Willie Wonka leaving his legacy to a child. No one has seen the kingdom realm. Looking for a successor that he could trust his dream with. One was entitled one wanted to be famous. One was rebellious. But Charlie who was the least likely to be picked and the one who broke the rules and tried to hide it. The other children took themselves out. They broke the rules. They signed a contract. They were given a gobstopper but it was a test to see the heart. Charlie gave up his opportunity to be rich and gave his gobstopper. So shines a good deed in a weary world. You did what was right so it’s all yours. 

Banning Liebscher 

God’s heart for you is to be fully alive and fully free. The job description of Jesus is giving life to the full. The enemy wants you in bondage. His primary weapon of choice is lies. Lies to separate you from the truth. Connect to truth equals freedom. Lies separate and lead to bondage. 

“so that Satan will not outsmart us. For we are familiar with his evil schemes.” 2 Corinthians 2:11 NLT

1 Kings 19 Elijah coming off Mt Carmel. After this great victory, he then begins lies. 

3 lies we still wrestle with today: 

He believed the lie that God abandoned him. Not that he became a full-blown atheist but a situational atheist. God is not in this situation. God has the whole world in his hands but not this situation. God exists just not in our finances or marriage. 

He believed the lie that the situation was hopeless. Elijah sat down. He stopped moving forward. 

He believed the lie that he was all alone. That there were no more people with him. 

How is it that Elijah a man of God is believing God and then the next moment is believing a lie. A profound victory with a whole nation turning back to God and then believes lies. The enemy is looking for a foothold to place a lie. 

Elijah was worn down and worn out and dropped his guard. When you’re worn out you drop your guard and the enemy steps in with a foothold. Boxing 101. Touch their head to keep their guard. The enemy is trying to get you to drop your guard for just a second. 

Above all else, guard your heart. Everything you do flows from it. The enemy wants you to drop your guard. He will plant lies that take root. 

Combat medics. 

Care under fire. Care at the scene where both under hostile fire. Tourniquet on major bleed. Quickly assess what matters. You could be fixing his shoulder when he’s bleeding out. Assess quickly the major bleeds. You can deal with other things later but above all else right now guard your heart. When going through difficult times guard your heart. Don’t allow the enemy to gain access with lies. 

When we are worn down we drop the guard. Sometimes a lot is coming at us. A cat on the u-haul season. A lot of stuff happening right now. 

Sometimes we drop our guard because we think a season is going to be over but it’s not over. In boxing, they prepare for 5 rounds but it goes 7 and they are not prepared for the later rounds. 

Sometimes you drop your guard because you just keep getting hit in the same place. When it rains it pours. 

We have to get a lot better at figuring out what we are believing. Lies operate in darkness. They get power in the shadows. Do we stop long enough to check under the house? What’s going on in my eternal world? 

How do you keep your guard up in life?

Don’t underestimate the power of a meal and a nap. 

God’s going to meet face to face with Elijah but he provided a meal and a nap. The physical and spiritual are connected. Figure out what your meal and a nap is. If you’re worn out you don’t need to fast. You don’t need to get up early and pray. You need a nap. Elijah believed lies because he’s tired. 

Always keep one foot in the water. 

Navy Seals thrive in the water when others can’t. America special forces book. Sea, Air, Land. If I can retreat to water, it’s where I’m most comfortable and confident. The enemy can’t follow me into water. Water is where I thrive and where you die. In the presence of God, you must retreat. I may feel powerless here but in the presence of God, I have oxygen and lies die. Retreat to the presence. In the presence is joy and strength. I feel weak here but in Christ I have joy. You have to have a default mode to retreat to the presence of God. You can find his presence anywhere at any time. Turn your heart and affections to God. In your presence, lies and discouragement dies. 

Who you show up with matters. 

Elijah has a servant with him who he left and went a days journey to complain about being alone. Pity parties are a party of one. Our guard drops when we disconnect from the community. Who you show up with matters. It’s just me and Jesus when it comes to salvation but after walking through that door he introduces you to your family. “We’ve given it our best and it’s just not working.” Giving it your best is not enough, it’s not healthy. My marriage has health and blessing not because I brought my best but because I got the best of others and brought it in. We are strong because who you show up with matters. I may get whooped once but why would I show up again when I’ve got friends. Make phone calls and don’t go at it alone. The most discouraged people are those who get isolated. Our guard drops when we disconnect from community. Those alone are wide open to deception and the devil gets a foothold. Community matters. 

Toby Mac

A story and the integrity to back it up. 

The edge of your seat posture. Today I GET to…

It has to be a priority when small or it won’t be a priority when big. Be faithful with the little things. 

A gift God gave me to turn eyes to him. 

Building a team. Pray, “God will you surround me with people who love you more than I do so that I can be inspired by them and grow.” 

It’s our job to empower others and let them thrive. Step into the mirror. I can’t do this. I’m not strong enough but God has given me you, the secret sauce. 

Not just a Christian but someone who loves the Lord. If you dare to call Him your Lord there’s only one position for you and that’s a servant. Servants main job is to wait on the Lord’s request. When you hear it, act. 

Nate and Joanna Lampa

When you love someone you fall in love with what they love. Where is God looking? What matters to God matters to you. 

God loves the wild ones and the church needs them. 

When you approach the broken and marginalized remember God is already there. 

God loves you right where you are at. 

Write your whole life in one sentence. 

Ryan Lampa

Without a true north, it’s really hard to navigate. 

Is your five dollar program going to take away my depression or addictions? No. I just want to be your friend. 

God, I’m missing something. Will you just show me how to love? 

There’s only one tried and true way to help someone in the margins. Introduce them to the creator. 

The scale at which you do these things. Don’t start with building a nonprofit. Start by feeding one two or three. Don’t start a board of directors, grab your friends. 

Feed the hungry. Drinks to the thirst. Clothes to those who need clothes. Welcome strangers. 

In obeying these statutes, remember Jesus prayer for all of us. Be as intimate with each other as God is with His father. 

When you focus on things of the spirit the things of the world fall away. 

The blood of the lamb and the word of your testimony. 

Danny Gokey

Make space for God in your heart. It starts with a hunger. What do you need to release to make room for God? 

Some of the best things that can happen in your life is a shut door. 

Failure to a believer is really transition. God uses it. 

Are you hungry and available? 

Better than I found it. 

If our public life doesn’t match our public life it will all come crashing down. 

Mark Maxwell

Your mission field isn’t just on the other side of the world, it’s feet from your house. Be expectant for God to move each and every day. 

What is your definition of success? 

Networking kills. Young artist lose focus. False indicator of success. Contradicts the creator who is all about giving and not taking. Whoever wants to be great must be a servant. 

Serving is where you are successful. 

Anybody can be great because anybody can serve. Martin Luther King. 

Serving erases the fear of failure.

Serving creates a sense of purpose. 

Serving creates value for you and others. 

Serving creates a provision. 

Serving changes the world because it changes others. 

The world call is karma, the Bible calls it planting and harvesting.

Life moves pretty fast. Don’t miss the moments. 

Psalm 90. Redeem the time. Make every conversation count. 

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Robert Madu

Do you have an expectation to hear God’s word? Someone once said this was the best message you ever preached but maybe this was just the best message you ever listened to.

Mark 5:21-43

Almost titles this message ”Get Up” but because of verse 40-41 ”Get Out”

“The crowd laughed at him. But he made them all leave, and he took the girl’s father and mother and his three disciples into the room where the girl was lying.” Mark 5:40 NLT

You know those people who light up a room when they leave the room. 

Jesus made them all leave. He kicked them out. Those who laughed, He kicked out. 

What if the power of the miracle isn’t just in the miracle itself but in the atmosphere of the environment. Check your environment and tell some things to get out. 

Once you peel back the layers you see that none of us live in the autonomy of me, myself, and I. We are connected. 

You do you and I do me doesn’t work. You doing you affects me. 

These two stories of Jairus and the woman suffering from blood are connected. He is a ruler in the synagogues she isn’t even allowed in. He is rich and she is broke. He is named and respected. She is not. They are both hit with something neither of them can’t handle. 

When you can’t handle it, throw up your hands and know that surely He can handle it. 

They both had to push people away do get to Jesus. Do something they didn’t have to do before to get something they have never received. You want God to show up like Amazon prime but sometimes you have to push something out of the way. They are pushing because desperate people do desperate things. 

God will often use desperation to push you into your destiny. Desperation is the door that breakthrough walks through. Desperation brought them both to the feet of Jesus. 

Jairus is desperate because his daughter IS dying. The 12-year-old dying daughter and the woman was bleeding for 12 years. If this were a movie both would walk out of the hospital very differently. In life, you can be so preoccupied with your promise or problems that you are oblivious to others. You need to rejoice with those who rejoice and weep with those who weep. Romans 12. 

”Biblical Blues Clues” 12

Jacob had 12 sons

12 tribes of Israel 

A breastplate with 12 stones on the priest

Jesus taught in the temple at the age of 12

Jesus chose 12 disciples

The number of Gods power and authority. 

Everything is under the power and authority of Jesus. He can handle whatever the world is throwing at you. 

It is your awareness of Gids authority in your life that will determine what you receive from Him. Tie your faith to the anchor of God’s authority. You need an awareness of God’s authority. He is the ultimate authority. 

Jesus calming the storm. They marveled at His authority and said you of little faith. They shouldn’t have woken Jesus up they should have curled up and taken a nap with confidence in His authority. An awareness of His authority problem. 

When you trust God as the authority you can sleep at night because He’s in charge. 

Jairus got a house call from Jesus because he was aware of Gods authority. The woman knew Jesus authority and knew she only needed to touch His coat. 

The centurion soldier knew Jesus had authority without even showing up. He knew God’s power. 

”You don’t have a faith problem, you have an awareness of God’s authority issue.”

If you don’t believe the speaker has authority you doubt their word. Example of customer service, can I speak to your manager. Can I speak to has the power to change the situation? 

I hope you get so annoyed when the devil is messing with you and your family and say that you need to speak to the one who is in charge. The one with authority. 

The moment she touched the hem of His garment she was healed. This interruption comes after being filled with the joy when Jesus says He will go to Jairus daughter. This was an emergency and Jairus was waiting on Jesus. The woman broke the law by being unclean and touching Jesus. Jesus stops and talks to her. Jairus is waiting. She told him the whole story. Jairus is waiting. He watched her get her miracle and waited. 

What do you do when you watch someone get a miracle while you are waiting on a miracle. Celebrate. Don’t be jealous. Know God is still in the blessing business. He did it for them and He can do it for me. Not always in the same way. Stop comparing yourself to other people. 

Jairus wanted healing and got a resurrection. But remember what he had to go through. His daughter died. They came and said it was time to quit and give up on the dream God gave them. Watch out for these people. 

Jesus says don’t be afraid just believe. Don’t stay here, it’s not over till I say it is. Sometimes God will let it go from bad to worse so that you stop trying to lead God and allow Him to lead you.

They arrived at the house and the people laughed. Jesus said to get out. Say to your insecurity to get out. 

Darrell Johnson

Ephesians 1:3 ”Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us in the heavenly realms with every spiritual blessing in Christ.”

The role of preaching in a worship service is to explain to the people what they just experienced. 

Through worship, we participate in the mystery. Worship if the living God does not begin with us and it does not end with us. 

To enter into a worship service here on earth is to join in on a worship service already taking place in heaven. Things are not what they seem. 

Loved ones didn’t pass away, they passed through. 

The question is not what did I get out of it. The question is did I enter into the worship already in progress. 

“It was in the year King Uzziah died that I saw the Lord. He was sitting on a lofty throne, and the train of his robe filled the Temple.” Isaiah 6:1 NLT 740bc. 

“Attending him were mighty seraphim, each having six wings. With two wings they covered their faces, with two they covered their feet, and with two they flew. They were calling out to each other, “Holy, holy, holy is the Lord of Heaven’s Armies! The whole earth is filled with his glory!” Isaiah 6:2-3 NLT

“Then as I looked, I saw a door standing open in heaven, and the same voice I had heard before spoke to me like a trumpet blast. The voice said, “Come up here, and I will show you what must happen after this.” And instantly I was in the Spirit, and I saw a throne in heaven and someone sitting on it.

Each of these living beings had six wings, and their wings were covered all over with eyes, inside and out. Day after day and night after night they keep on saying, “Holy, holy, holy is the Lord God, the Almighty— the one who always was, who is, and who is still to come.” Revelation 4:1-2, 8 NLT

From Isaiah to Revelation something changed. 740BC To 92AD something changed. 

What is the same and what is different between these two passages? The difference is what makes Christian worship Christian. 

What’s the same?

Both have the same thrown. 

The throne is occupied. 

The king’s death bright fear. Christian persecution brings fear. 

The rise and fall of empires. When all other thrones disintegrate this throne remains. 

Holy, holy, holy. Same song. 

Creatures with six wings attend to the throne. 

Worship

What’s different?

24 other thrones. The living God brings 24 others in 2×12. The fulfillment of Jesus promises you will reign with me. The capital T throne is not toppled and neither are the lower case t thrones. The gates of hell will not prevail. 

6 wings and with two wings cover their faces. Unable to handle the presence of God. Later no mention of covering faces and they are full of eyes. Now they can behold holiness. Now they can stand in the presence of holiness. 

In the middle of the throne a lamb. In the middle of the one holy one who sits on the throne is a lamb as if slain. 

Something has been changed for creation to be in the presence of God. No longer hiding their faces but opening their eyes and looking at the lamb of God. It was woe is me and now it’s worthy is the lamb. Jesus is worthy because He made it possible for me to be there. 

Grace greater than all our sin. In the middle of all that holiness is the lamb calling you in. 

Not woes is me but worthy is He. 

You are not the point in worship. It’s not what you got out of it. Did I realize Jesus is at the center of it all and did I cry out to Him who isn’t the center of it all? 

Paul Bergin 

When the atmosphere changes and a mighty wind blows in there is something of a new birth of the Spirit of God. 

“At the Lord’s command, the whole community of Israel left the wilderness of Sin and moved from place to place. Eventually they camped at Rephidim, but there was no water there for the people to drink. So once more the people complained against Moses. “Give us water to drink!” they demanded. “Quiet!” Moses replied. “Why are you complaining against me? And why are you testing the Lord?” Exodus 17:1-2 NLT

“Moses named the place Massah (which means “test”) and Meribah (which means “arguing”) because the people of Israel argued with Moses and tested the Lord by saying, “Is the Lord here with us or not?” Exodus 17:7 NLT

“In the first month of the year, the whole community of Israel arrived in the wilderness of Zin and camped at Kadesh. While they were there, Miriam died and was buried. There was no water for the people to drink at that place, so they rebelled against Moses and Aaron.

Moses and Aaron turned away from the people and went to the entrance of the Tabernacle, where they fell face down on the ground. Then the glorious presence of the Lord appeared to them,

But the Lord said to Moses and Aaron, “Because you did not trust me enough to demonstrate my holiness to the people of Israel, you will not lead them into the land I am giving them!” This place was known as the waters of Meribah (which means “arguing”) because there the people of Israel argued with the Lord, and there he demonstrated his holiness among them.” Numbers 20:1-2, 6, 12-13 NLT

What is the same and what is different? 

God is saying to His people He will provide all their needs in a barren land. 

If you’re in a wilderness season remember that  God provides living water. 

In numbers 20, it’s the same water, the same rock but a different generation that has not known what it means to live in captivity. 

The difference now is you are to speak to the rock. 

As a teenager, a raging torrent came from his belly and put his mouth in a knot of words that poured out for hours. 

Holy Spirit is in us, with us, and wants to move through us. 

We have a popularity preaching contest. It’s not about being on the stage and entertaining. 

“And the Holy Spirit helps us in our weakness. For example, we don’t know what God wants us to pray for. But the Holy Spirit prays for us with groanings that cannot be expressed in words.” Romans 8:26 NLT

When you don’t know what to pray for you have an interceder. Interceding through you and in you. You are not left to your self. You are not hopeless. You don’t have all the answers but the person of the Holy Spirit does. 

The Holy Spirit because He is The One and Only. 

Pray, ”Holy Spirit, what should I do?”

Water came out of the second rock even though it wasn’t the will of God. 

Isn’t it funny that when we ask the Holy Spirit He helps us? He’s trying out for someone to partner with Him. 

“I don’t want you to forget, dear brothers and sisters, about our ancestors in the wilderness long ago. All of them were guided by a cloud that moved ahead of them, and all of them walked through the sea on dry ground. In the cloud and in the sea, all of them were baptized as followers of Moses. All of them ate the same spiritual food, and all of them drank the same spiritual water. For they drank from the spiritual rock that traveled with them, and that rock was Christ.” 1 Corinthians 10:1-4 NLT

This is the rock of Christ being revealed in the new covenant. The church needs to see something now. They are being filled with living waters. 

Went from glorious moment to disobedience. Unbelief is at the heart of it. You didn’t sanctify me as Holy. You didn’t show me as one set apart. God isn’t glorified. 

Moses wasn’t just ticked off with the people he was offended by God. Don’t run to people but fall on your face before God. 

The power is in you. You don’t need to strike the rock twice. 

Jesus died once and once for all. His death and resurrection is enough to accomplish all. His blood is enough for me. Your issue is not bigger than the blood of Christ. It’s resurrection power. Know what the blood does over your life. The Spirit always follows the word. If you’ve seen the father you’ve seen me. If you don’t know the word you are walking around powerless. Where is the ability to get the job done? This is the age of anxiety. Let this be the age of peace. It’s not the will of God that you live in fear. 

Speak to the rock. Speak to the Spirit. Talk with your partner and co-laborer. The enemy is no match. 

Psalm 23. This is a warfare passage. 

The Lord prepares the table. 

It’s easy to think that you host Him. That you serve Him. 

Turn the affection of your heart to God. 

He invites you into Him. He is the host and invites you into communion with the Holy Spirit. He prepares the table. Jesus says welcome. You don’t have to worry or fear because the Spirit prepares the table in the presence of your enemy. 

Crucified with Christ means your fears have died. You don’t care about looking foolish. 

Why ask for God to show up? He’s there and never leaves. 

“Anyone who believes in me may come and drink! For the Scriptures declare, ‘Rivers of living water will flow from his heart.’” (When he said “living water,” he was speaking of the Spirit, who would be given to everyone believing in him. But the Spirit had not yet been given, because Jesus had not yet entered into his glory.)” John 7:38-39 NLT

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6 Ways to Fall in Love With Youth Ministry Again

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You had a discouraging meeting… a bad day… a frustrating week… a dry season. You find yourself taking deeper sighs than usual and you know things are less than okay. While you used to be excited for the next thing in youth ministry, today you find ourself dreading even walking in the building.

It might be time for you to polish your resume or maybe it’s just time to change your thinking. There’s still hope, so let’s rekindle the love you once had. Here are 6 ways to fall back in love with youth ministry.

Remember Your Calling. 

It’s easy and natural to focus on the negative, but it’s hard to quit something you know God has called you to do. Take a step back and reflect on your life story. See how God has worked to get you to this point so far and lean into His faithfulness. “You didn’t choose me. I chose you. I appointed you to go and produce lasting fruit, so that the Father will give you whatever you ask for, using my name” (John 15:16, NLT).

Use Your Vacation And Days Off.

Maybe the reason you’re feeling so tired is that you ARE tired. Open up your calendar and mark off some days to find rest. Find a day in the near future to have a sabbatical day of rest and reflection. If your circumstances make this impossible, remember you control your calendar. Stop scheduling early morning and late-night meetings. Don’t work through lunch. Ask if you can spend a few hours a week working at the local coffee shop. The world will keep spinning if you skip a week of breakfast meetings or late-night Bible studies. Even Jesus stepped away from the crowd from time to time.

Adjust Your Expectations. 

Jesus explains, “I have told you all this so that you may have peace in me. Here on earth you will have many trials and sorrows. But take heart, because I have overcome the world” (John 16:33, NLT). Youth ministry can be full of high highs and low lows. When you are in the valley, resist becoming overly critical or bitter by humbly counting your blessings and considering trials pure joy. Step back for a minute and check yourself.

Shake It Up

My mentor and friend Jim Wideman says, “A rut is just a grave with the ends kicked out.” Maybe you aren’t feeling it anymore because it’s become too predictable and stale. Rearrange or organize your office. Bring in a guest speaker. Start a new book. Hang out with people in (or outside) the trenches. Sharpen your ax and study to show yourself approved. Find a healthy way to vent or start a new hobby. Work on the ministry you want and not just in the ministry you have.

Celebrate And Remember

Just like it’s difficult to hear from God with a dusty Bible, it’s hard to fall out of love with the youth ministry you are celebrating. Stop working on the next big thing, and celebrate what God is doing at this moment. Take a trip down memory lane next year by placing personal milestones on your calendar and set yearly reoccurring celebrations such as baptisms and movements of God. Remember your priorities and publicly celebrate when your small group leaders are working towards making disciples. Dream of what youth ministry could be and begin praying over the vision God brings.

Don’t Go At It Alone.

We were created for community. The writer of Romans tells us, “Just as our bodies have many parts and each part has a special function, so it is with Christ’s body. We are many parts of one body, and we all belong to each other” (Romans 12:4-5 NLT). If you are losing your love for ministry, it might be because you are failing to equip the church to do the work of ministry and instead relying on your gifting alone. Check-in with your leaders and meet up with your students to see what they can be doing to build and support the church. Get feedback and stop trying to read minds. Meet with your supervisor and let them know both your needs and your struggles.

Don’t allow today to just be another long day in your youth ministry journey. Do something today to light a small spark to ignite a fire in your heart for the ministry God has entrusted you with.