54 Interesting Quotes From the #D62016 Conference

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Can you think of a time when God surprised you through opening up certain doors? You were hoping to do something or be somewhere and were delighted to see it come to fruition. A few weeks ago, I was hoping to have the opportunity to attend the D6 Conference with my youth pastor but unfortunately the details did not line up. Then through a random conversation with a friend, we were invited to attend. I am so grateful for this wonderful opportunity and would love to share with you 54 interesting quotes from my last minute #D62016 Conference.

Brian Haynes – @brian_haynes

“The Enemy will work hard to keep you from bearing fruit. His favorite scheme is what I call a stronghold cycle.“

“Identify the lie you are believing and share the truth of God’s Word.”

“What is one event where I was wounded? What is one lie I believe about God, myself, or others? What is one truth that God wants me to receive?”

“But God is faithful and fair. If we confess our sins, he will forgive our sins. He will forgive every wrong thing we have done. He will make us pure.” 1 John 1:9

Ron Hunter – @ronhunter

“Your identity is found in Christ and you are enough.”

“Now the Lord is the Spirit, and where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom.” 2 Corinthians 3:17

“People will never change until they are given a reason to change.”

“Slinky Dog is about leadership. Point the way, stretch and let the back catch up.”

“Leaders don’t out lead your organization. Stretch and let them catch up.”

“Set your parents up for success.”

“People will never change until they are given a reason to change.”

Robby Gallaty – @Rgallaty

“How different would the lives of those around us be if we really got serious about making disciples?”

“Do you spend time executing ministry or equipping believers to do ministry?”

“Ministry is the pathway to maturity, not vice versa.”

“KISS Method: Keep, Increase, Start, Stop”

“The greatest gift we can give a child is a mom and dad who love Jesus.”

“If you seek to build a church, you rarely produce disciples, but if you seek to make disciples you always get the church.” – Mike Breen

“You can lose your ministry and still keep your family but if you lose your family you lose them both.”

“The Gospel came to you because it was heading to someone else!”

“Baptism is not the finish line, it’s the starting line.”

Axis Ideas – @axisideas

“Kids would rather lose their sense of taste than their smartphone.”

“What is our 500 year plan? Have we translated the Gospel to the next generation?”

Lisa Harper – @lisadharper

“Perfection is not a prerequisite for a relationship with Jesus Christ.”

“The Bible is not a collection of morality tales.”

Mark 10:49 “And Jesus Stopped” – “Programs are never more important than people.”

“Our God may say wait or stop but he will never say you’re not good enough for the journey he’s called you to.”

Brian and Angela Haynes – @brian_haynes

“Prioritize Home: You need a family table moment, eyeball to eyeball. Shalom in the home!”

“A wise parent relentlessly pursues a heart connection with their child.”

“Prayer is powerful in pursuing your teenagers heart.”

“In parenting, it’s not about strategy, it’s about heart connection.”

“We need to share the gospel with BOLDNESS with our kids! We need to have them walk alongside us!”

Megan Fate Marshman – @meganfate

“Who God was is who God is and who God will forever be.”

“I can’t picture a comfortable way to carry a cross.”

“God is a community in and of Himself; so how important do you think community is to God?”

“Leaders never consider themselves the exception.”

“The story of the Bible is not a story of people seeking God, it’s a story of God wanting to be with His people.”

“If you stand in your career and it shatters, so will you.”

Dr. Richard Ross – @richardaross

“Is Jesus the main conversation in your home?”

“Let your kids watch you have an awakening to Jesus Christ.”

“The most powerful spiritual development experience a teenager has is doing ministry with their parents.”

Yancey Arrington – @YanceyArrington

“Parents are the primary disciple maker. Equally true is what are you going to disciple them in.”

“The gospel is not just the A-B-C’s but the A-Z of Christianity.” Tim Keller

“The gospel is God doing for us in Christ, what we cannot do for ourselves!”

“The aim is not good kids, it’s gospel kids.”

“When the dust settles, do we say, ‘Wow, what a great service that was’ or, ‘Wow, what a great Savior Jesus is’”?

Pat Cimo

“After that generation died, another generation grew up who did not acknowledge the LORD or remember the mighty things he had done for Israel.” Judges 2:10

“God wants us to drive real change from out kidmin seats.”

“Am I misusing my influence? Am I stewarding the influence to the extent that God wants me to?”

Skit Guys – @skitguys

“Iron sharpens iron, So one man sharpens another.” – Proverbs 27:17

“Do not shove away your hurts and hangups because you’re focused on discipling other people.”

“Jesus can handle whatever it is that has a hold of you.”

Eric Metaxas – @ericmetaxas

“I love to have the freedom to say, ‘Thank you Jesus!’”

“Everyone is influenced by you and you are leading them to Jesus or away from Jesus every second.”

“Kids don’t need to get the idea that there is “devil good” and “Jesus good”. All good is of Jesus.”

 

“Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength. These commandments that I give you today are to be on your hearts. Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up.” Deuteronomy 6:5-7

The Fascinating Truth About Investing In Yourself

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When was the last time you picked up a Dr. Seuss book and just began reading? In his book, Happy Birthday to You! Seuss wrote, “Today you are You, that is truer than true. There is no one alive who is Youer than You.” If God created you and created you for a specific purpose, are you on the path of reaching that goal? Are you stewarding your life to your full potential so that in the end you will hear, “Well done, good and faithful servant!” Today, I want you to ask yourself three questions to help you discover the fascinating truth about investing in yourself.

1. How are you taking care of yourself? You are the only you there is, so are you taking care of yourself? If God has gifted you with a long life, are you stewarding that gift well or are you living in such a way that will cut that gift short? Maybe today, you need to invest in yourself through the purchase of exercise equipment. Maybe today you visit the eye doctor or consider the quality of food you are ingesting. And maybe today you need to take a serious spiritual health assessment. Taking a few steps in the right direction in self-care today can put you on a completely different path tomorrow.

2. When are you investing in your marriage? Second to your relationship with God is the relationship you have with your spouse. If you asked your spouse today when was the last time you invested in the marriage, would it take them an awkwardly long minute to answer? How about pulling out your calendar and marking off a night for a special date? Consider buying something special to simply say, “I love you.” Or maybe come up with a silly holiday like “happy wife day” to invest in your marriage. Help your spouse not just know that you love them but feel that love.

3. How are you taking your next step in personal development? What was the last book you invested your money and time into reading? Do you have a coach or mentor helping you reach your full potential? Have you sought out more education or training? There are numerous free and paid resources available to help you grow in personal development. Are you taking personal development seriously?

Take time today to invest in yourself. The investment you make today can pay off dividend in your future self. You have one life to live, steward it well.

How To Host A Simple Turf War For Your KidMin 

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This past week our preteens made lasting memories as they enjoyed pizza, funnoodles, and small group shenanigans during our Turf War. This annual event draws a crowd as each small group is battling to get the first pick on their small group rooms. While the activity itself is different each year, the Turf War promotes small group ministry, builds strong teams, and involves a lot of friendly competition. Here are a few steps to help you host a simple Turf War for your kids ministry.

MARK YOUR CALENDAR

You don’t need to have all the details outlined to begin planning but a great place to start is by simply marking the date on your calendar. This gives you a goal to aim for and the deadline to make it happen. If you’re like me, great ideas don’t happen until you write them down.

ENLIST SMALL GROUP LEADERS

Explain to your small group leaders why you are hosting this event. Is your goal to grow numerically? Do you want to build camaraderie on your existing teams? Are you looking for something fun for small groups to do together? Determine why you would like to host this event and make sure your team understands the purpose.

BUILD EXCITEMENT

After you have your small group leaders on board you need to get the kids excited. For our Turf War, the preteens were excited to compete for their rooms. Those who earned great rooms the previous year wanted to defend their turf while new small groups wanted to get in on the action. We assigned team colors and asked the kids to represent their teams well. By the time the week arrived the students were boldly wearing the color’s and bringing friends to build their team’s depth.

LINE UP THE DETAILS

Now is the hard part that may require a lot of work your first year. Create your plan and your backup plan because let’s be honest, it never goes exactly how we think it should. Schedule out how much time it will take to eat, what your transitions will look like, who needs to be where and when, and how much food these preteens are going to devour! Think through details like how you will determine a winner, what to do if there is a tie, and who will treat injuries.

DETERMINE YOUR GAME

Each of our Turf War events has a different game and competition. Last year we hosted a multiple team capture the flag type battle where each team was protecting their turf while also trying to get materials from their opponents. This year, we hosted olympic type competitions that revolved around funnoodles. I will attach a PDF with more info to this post if you want to read more about this year’s battle.

LEAD OR ASSIGN LEADERS

When the event comes, it will make things run smoother if your team can look to the leader. If this is you, practice what you need to say, and know the rules. If you are assigning leaders, make sure they have clear job descriptions and expectations. Nothing frustrates kids more than when games fall apart or are perceived as unfair. Know how you are going to handle situations when they arrive and be prepared to take on the responsibility.

Hosting a Turf War type event can be a great opportunity to connect your students and their small group leaders. If you have an idea for the game we could do next year leave it in the comments. If you have any questions about hosting a Turf War, just let me know!

Link for Funnoodles Activities

Orange Tour Final Session Notes with Reggie Joiner and Kristen Ivy

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Did a parent say this to a toddler or middle schooler game?

Every family matters regardless.
40 hours for the church.
400 playing video games.
3000 parents.

40 hours matter. If you see those 40 hours as a catalyst for the rest of the week, those hours matter even more.

Every family matters regardless of what they look like. 75% of families do not consistent of a husband and wife who live with their biological kids. Divorce, adopted, foster, single…

I don’t go to this church, I live with my mom and she goes to this church. Husband left me when I became pregnant. I just need to know that she’s going to be okay because this is t what I thought my family was going to look like.

A picture mindset as a church forces people to question. How do I measure up or how do I get there?

Marriage: Thought or pictured what marriage would look like. Tried to get someone else to measure up to your picture. Expectation vs reality makes the degree of dissolution-meant.

Another concept that is more powerful. Not picture mindset. A story mindset:
God wants to tell regardless of the picture. Restoration. Redemption. God uses broken people. No picture perfect model families in the Bible. When I read about the families in the Bible I feel better about mine.

You will get frustrated if you have a picture perspective. If you have a story perspective it changes. Never measure up or live up to the picture perfect family. Hope vs. dissolutions.

Every family matters to me regardless of what you believe.

Every family matters regardless of what they believe. Even families who aren’t Christians still make a difference, positive or negative, in their kids.

Your church is strategically positions in culture to remind everyone that ever family matters.
Help parents win at parenting. A lot of parents don’t think the church is set up to let them win.

Believe 2 things: Every church needs do to act like…
Every parent wants to be a better parent!
Every parent will do som thing more.

What does it look like to help parents win or to partner with parents.

The church should be making it as easy as possible for parents to win in the relationship with their kids.

Dad might not be a great communicator. Do everything possible to help the dad win relationally with their daughter.

What does a win look likes?
1. Help them be more present with their family. Connect in a better way. Relationship goes deeper because they are more present.
2. Be more connected with to a faith community. Those outside connect. Those inside become more connected. 100% won’t be invested but all can take a step.

Leverage fancily times. Meal, bed, drive,
Initiate critical conversations
Connect with mentors and peers.
Engaging in faith activities.
Reinforcing what their kids learn at church
Expanding adult influences in their kids life.

Pro Tip: Invite other adults into the life of your kid besides you.

If you really build a relational model then the shortest distance between your church and the parent is a small group leader. With a little tweak you can make a gigantic connection.

Kristen Ivey: @Kristen_Ivy
How do your small group leaders view the kids parents?

Long after a sgl is out of the life, mom and dad are still there. It’s easy to judge the parents and your role is to build a bridge to that family. Help their heart become more connected to their parents.

How small group leaders can connect with parents.

Make an initial connection. Introduce yourself.
At the beginning of the year introduce yourself and ask for a story of your kid that communicates who they are.

Give them access to you. Parents will stalk you after you connect with their kid. Be upfront and give them your contact. And look at your media through the eyes of the parents.

Leverage technology to connect regularly. Text messages. Stay in front of them regularly. They will remember who you are and that you care.

Show up where parents show up. Ball games etc.

Help them find an answer. If you haven’t parented a teenager in your own home don’t assume that you know how to parent a teenager. Connect them with other parents. Who are those that can be connected with.

Say something positive. 1 positive for every 7 negative. You have opportunity to encourage a parent. Lean in and tell parents the wonderful things you see in their kids. Give the parents credit.


Reggie:
Rediscover what you can do when it comes to engaging parents.
You don’t parent a 5 year old the same way you do a 6 year old or 16 year old.

How can a Church connect with parents?
Establish an annual orientation
Offer periodic small group studies
Develop a weekly cueing strategy
Celebrate critical milestones -6 unique times
Create opportunities for share experiences

When 50% don’t show up?
Small group leaders giving parents their content.

What would happen if you tried to…
Engage every parent to do something more.

Every parent is made in the image God, that’s the reason why some nonchristian parents are better than Christian parents.

Do something!
Raise the tide.

Orange Tour Breakout Notes with Sue Miller

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Becoming a better leader of volunteers!

When a volunteer comes to you and says that they want more? What do you tell them?

A free piano illustration.
Stopped playing because scared of the basement and wanted mom to be there.

Volunteers don’t quit because of poor curriculum or the kids but because of the environment. Don’t give them an inch to quit over.

Why do volunteers quit?
They quit because the do t play a significant role.
Don’t feel Appreciate
Personal needs are not met.
No praise or recognition given.

Ask: how can we value you? How to appreciate?
Protect their schedules. What is best for them and their families? Competing programs and asking them to do more. Do we need all of these programs? Do they all drive disciple making? What can you take off the table?
80% of people only invest in themselves.

*Don’t wait until someone has died to share their story.

Praise and recognition.

Environment is the key

No sense of team work. No ministry done alone.

Conflict amount team members. Think about the energy when a team is all heading in the same direction to win. Think of the olympics.

15 minutes before service, provide a snack and get together. Say. What’s the best thing that happened to me. Start with you then next person. Then say. Say as much as you want or as little.

People will leave a task but not a family.

They are not involved in decision making. You may think that they don’t care about decision making but they truly do. You may be surprised how many times you hear, “This is my church, I’d be honored to serve in this way.”

Here’s how you know that it’s working, go through their rooms and stand back processing the room. Is there energy? Is there momentum? Do they know one another? Look for their eyes to shine.

Sometimes we ask to little of volunteers.

No chance for advancement.
Don’t see that they are making a difference.
No chance for personal growth. Book, night out, great show or outing. Say I believe in you!
Who are your most influential key core leaders?

Change is not a bad word.

We are going to see God do amazing things in and through your life; buckle up!

Celebrate with your team every year. The words you say matter. The fact that you took the time for them is what matters. Can your lead pastor come and say thank you to the team?

Remember those who laid the foundation when a student gives their life to Christ. Invite the nursery workers into this celebration.

@SueMiller01

Session Notes with Reggie Joiner and Kara Powell

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Churches are shrinking and aging. Young people 17% or population but 10% of churches.

The greatest hope for the future is the church.

10k hours of research in churches.

6 core commitments that help the church grow young. God is moving in all sizes, shapes, and styles of churches. The core of the church isn’t the faculty or how hip you are.

Relational warmth.
#1 phrase used was its like family.
When it comes to reaching young people warm is the new cool. They want us to be us.

Prioritize young people everywhere.
Don’t just say it, mean it.

Time in erodes awareness of. We breed insider thinking.

What is our website presence like and what does that communicate with young people? Social media? Worship service? Coffee?

Set out to learn: How churches change young people but found that young people change churches. More vitality. More creativity. Innovation. Passion. Life.

50 year olds want to rub shoulders with vibrant 20 year olds. If the church can reach 20 year olds they will also be reaching 59 year olds.

ChurchesGrowingYoung.com

@KPowellFYI #OT16

Reggie:
Reggie Skipping Sunday school story.
Church should never be bring. Fight for it.

Reggie Changed the Sunday school literature.
Church should never be superficial.

Reggie Preached his sermon as a young guy.
Church should never be irrelevant

Engaging
Authentic
Relevant.

The truth matters.
You must understand development and thinking for an child. Do your homework and study kids. Phase project.
If you want to maximize your influence and get parents to tap into their hours you raise your odds of influence.

Truth matters when the child knows they matter to us.

The truth matters when love matters.
Create a context where they know they belong.
“Some truths are only understood in the context of a relationship.”

Speak the truth in love. Eph 4:15

You can’t speak the truth in love if you don’t know who you are talking to.
Preposition. Some of us get so caught up in what is wrong that we miss the person. Love your neighbor as yourself not change your neighbor as yourself.

It’s easier to fight for truth then to fight for the heart. We are called to get messy.

It’s not love that compromises the truth, it’s anger.

Kids need to know they matter to you.

As a leader you are called to knock on doors.
Some are worried to knock because there might be someone who answers the door.

Kids need to know what matters to them matters to you.

You can’t change your town but you can start with one person.

You only have influence when you care enough to continue showing up.

Kids need to know they matter to you more than what you believe.

Empathy. The ability to press pause on your own thoughts and feelings long enough to explore someone else’s thoughts and feelings.

Two ways to develop empathy:
1. Pause to imagine
Everyone has a story. Why not assume the best possible reason for the worse behavior?
2. Pause to interact
Relational change in your pocket.
Get personal and messy at times.
Humility.

“Rather, in humility value others above yourselves…in your relationships with one another, have the same mindset as Christ Jesus.”

Jesus was all powerful. He could have had influence because of this. All authority. All knowledge. But humbled himself.
Put on the mind of Christ.

Hebrews 4:15-16
“Let us then approach God’s throne of grace with confidence, so that I may receive mercy and find grace to help us…”

Jesus wanted a different kind of relationship with us.

You are a safe place. What would happen to this generation if they felt so known that they knew they could run to the church as a safe place?

Non-Christians don’t like the church often because of how we treat them.

As leaders, it’s not going to matter who gets elected. Churches must pick up the mantel and set a different theme. We carry what can’t be solved politically. What will fix things is if the church demonstrates that we care.

One one generation has failed to do the next generation can do. Set a new course that cares for people the way that Jesus cares. Show kids that they matter.

@reggiejoiner

Orange Tour Breakout Notes with Carey Nieuwhof

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Do you do pastoral visits? Carey fell asleep while praying at a pastoral prayer in his first year of ministry. The church grew and life got busy.

God will give you more people but He won’t give you more hours.
Sticking with my top priorities for the day when email and other staff can distract me.

Opportunities is the church word for distraction.

My inability to stay focused on a task and see it through to completion is my issue.

Message prep time. People will call to meet with you but they will never call to see if you are working on your message.

Unplugging to get a day off.

If your time management is getting out of control it bleeds into your time off. Who suffers over and over again? Your family. Your health.

How do manage your time?

Most leaders who accomplish significant things aren’t balanced people. They’re passionate people. Get rid of the myth of balance.

People who find balance often lose passion.

“Set yourself on fire with passion, and people will come from miles to watch you burn.” John Wesley.

Stop just managing time.
It’s all about time. Most time management tips are about time and don’t go far enough. All leaders have the same time. The President and single mom have the same amount of time.

Maximize the output of your time. Not more hours but more passion. Do you show up at home exhausted? What if you reserved passion so that when you got home it was on like Donkey Kong?

Enjoy your downtime. Be passionate about your environment. You don’t get more hours in a day you just need to learn how to develop them.

Stop saying, “I don’t have the time.”
Instead make your internal vocabulary, “I didn’t make the time.” Internal dialog.
You can make excuses or progress but you can’t make both.
If you say this out loud you will have no friends.
“I’m just not going to make time for that.”
When you say yes to something you are saying no to something else.
If you say yes to a meeting you might be saying no to a date with your wife.
Tremendously liberating.
Get honest with yourself.

Understand the work on it vs. work in it struggle.

Chart your energy.
Diminishing returns.
Hire impact in life and work. Manage your energy. Do this by charting it.
Not all hours are created equal.
You are at your best at different time intervals.
Morning people vs. mourning people.

Carey gets up between 4:30 and 5:30. The most he gets done happens before 10am. Getting paid to think, communicate, and write.

Your best work probably comes at a 3 hour time block. Is that early, afternoon, late? Find the pattern in your life and optimize it.

Not all tasks are created equal. There are things you love and things you hate in your job.
What do you love most about your job? 1:1 meetings with high impact leaders? Of your top 10 tasks for your job where do they fall on your passion scale? How do the tasks leave you feeling? Energized or drained. Monitor your tasks.

“Leaders who reach their highest impact do what they’re best at when they’re at their best.”

Start managing your energy
Sync up your energy and time.

Stop reacting.

Decide ahead of time who you will and won’t meet with. No one will ever ask you to complete your top priorities; they’re only going to ask you to complete theirs.

Spend 80% of your people time with the people who give you 80% of your results.

We are so busy putting out fires that we can’t water those who are growing.

Make a fixed calendar. Decide how you will spend your time before others decide for you. Don’t live in reactive mode. Decide today how you are spending next week. Don’t let next week happen to you.

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The High Impact Leader

@cnieuwhof #OT16