D6 Conference Notes #D62021

I’ll be updating this post along the way! Come back and check out my notes after each breakout and session at this year’s D6 Family Ministry Conference.

Volunteer Retention 101 with Rachel Price

Vision – The why

Why are we here? What is the vision?
How does serving on this team contribute to the vision?
Opportunity vs. obligation. 

*Survey the team, know what attracts them and keeps them. 

Organization – Not optional 

Put them in a position to win. 

Make it easy to serve. 

Communicate their time is valuable. 

Communicates you care. 


Personally – lead them personally before you leverage them organizationally. Keep a pulse on your team. 

Be there for them more than they are there for you. Actually care for them. 

Spiritually – Invest in their spatial growth. 

Organizationally – Jesus leadership model: 1, 3, 12, 72. Your team is a reflection of your leadership. 


Useful vs Used

No one wants to be a seat warmer. 

Are they there because they have a pulse or because they have a purpose? Do they know their purpose? 

Be a delegator not a dumper. 

Authority develops our leaders.


Don’t be afraid to say no, for yourself or for your team. 

Taking rest is key to avoiding burnout. 

Even God rested at creation. If God needed rest, how much more do we need it? 

Schedule on your calendar time to do nothing. This keeps your priority. 


Match the task to the talent

Right people in the right seat on the bus

Identify high-capacity leaders and challenge them.

Staff your weaknesses – let others’ talents shine where you are lacking. Moses and Aaron. 

Identify your high capacity leaders, put their talents to good use in higher positions. 


Empower and equip your team

Make decisions at the most efficient level. 

Empower them to lead within parameter. 

With empowerment comes accountability. 

Make the decisions that only you can make. Train them to think the way you want them to think. 

Luke 12:48


Show gratitude

Thank you in person every time they serve. Sincere and intentional, not just drive by. 

Card in the mail. 

Candy bar. Empowering team members to give out gifts. 

Reminder: You are making a difference. 


Relationship with your team, with the kids, and with the families. 

As You Go…

Talk to your team

What’s working? What’s not working? What can we do differently?
Do an exit interview when someone steps down. Ask why. 

Constantly Evaluate

General Session 1

Tim Elmore

Becoming Life-Giving Educators for Generation Z
Book: Generation Z Unfiltered

High Empowerment vs. High Entitlement
These teens are pictures of the spectrum of Generation Z

“Affluenza” is a social condition that arises from the desire to be more wealthy or successful. It can also be defined as the inability for an individual to understand the consequences of their actions because of their social status and/or financial privilege.

Greatest Question for today’s students.
Will they win or lose the battle for mental health?
Average teenager today experiences the same drama as students in the 60’s in a mental ward.
Will the pandemic produce distress or growth 82% of GenZ have experienced at least one traumatizing experience.
What narrative will they carry with them?

Who, are these new kids on the block?

Five generations coming of age: Builders, Boomers, Busters, Millennials, Homelanders

Coping and Hoping

1 Chronicles 12:32a – “From Issachar, men who understood the times and knew what Israel should do.”

What are the shifts going on as the millennials give way to Gen Z?

  1. Confidence is morphing into cation.
  2. Spending money is morphing into saving money.
  3. Attacking an education is morphing into hacking one.
  4. Idealism is morphing into pragmatism.
  5. Consuming media is morphing into creating media.
  6. Viral posts are morphing into vanishing posts.
  7. Feeling special is morphing into feeling savvy.
  8. Text messages are morphing into iconic messages.
  9. Anticipation is morphing into anxiety.

In the fall of 2020, the CDC reported that 1 in 4 young adults contemplated suicide in the last month. Lead with empathy!

Music is always a reflection of culture. gnash “pajamas” – 2019 song prophetic of the pandemic. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HkPMM3OEJv0

Can we be thankful we got through a hard time? The narrative has changed for students.

Helping Gen Z PROVE They Can Learn
Problem: Start with a problem not a curriculum. They learn just in time, not just in case. the Bible is the answer but let’s create the dilemma the Bible can solve. Give them a problem that engages them.
Relationships: They are craving real relationships. Primary looking to the older generations not institutions. Earn the right to be heard.
Ownership: Prescriptive not descriptive. Let your kids own the problem. Project based learning where you said, “What do you think?” What goal do you want to reach?
Visuals: Do a series that is all image based. Jesus was parable based. Story images that teach a lesson.
Experiences: They aren’t looking for a sage on the stage with a sermon, they are looking for a guide on the side with an experience.

SWe have an expectations problem.

66% of today’s adults report a negative rather than a positive emotion when they think about the future of Gen Z. How do you think these feelings impact them? How about believing in them?
65% of today’s adits believe that Generation Z will not be ready for adulthood when they reach it.

Habitude Quarterbacks and Referees.
Referees enforce rules, call fouls and watch boundaries.
Quarterbacks provide direction, inspire and deploy their team.
Fight the impulse to slip into a referee mindset. Be quarterbacks.

On the scandals on college admissions: Worst part of the whole experience, when I stood in my kitchen and my high school daughter looked at her and asked, “Why didn’t you believe in me.” May that never be asked of me or you again.

Dr. @TimElmore #D62021

Valerie Bell

Think about your mom for a minute. Mom-ism’s
Walk, don’t __
Look both ways before you cross the __.
Color inside the __.

Mothers were abundantly protective of us.

Protection says get in the back seat and fasten your seatbelt. Preparation says, get behind the wheel and learn to drive because you’re going to need that for your life.
Drowning is a risk, so get in the pool with me and learn to swim.

In one year…
Opioid deaths are up by 21%
Screen addiction has risen dramatically.
Anxiety disorders have tippled.
Depression has quadrupled.

Go through the grid of preparation not precaution. It’s time to raise up the greatest and most resilient generation regardless of what life throws at them. Who were trained to face hardship. A generation like we’ve never seen before.

It’s not about fun programing and beautiful decorations but having a relationship with God for life.

The world is more needy today than it’s ever been. Many people are damaged by this last year.

When you are hurt, when you are damaged, when you are afraid, going golfing is not going to the solve the problem…there is a natural gravitation to things of God and people of God.”

We have an opportunity now, like we have never had before, to raise up the greatest generation of disciples. We are in a battle for the souls of children and I believe we can win!

Resilience: A quality describing the spatial elasticity of a child or adult, the resistant strength to bend and flex, but not break against the weight of the culture.

Resilience is possible to learn. And even better news, it’s a spiritual quality.

Resilience is the muscle discipleship builds.

Discipleship is the muscle that builds resilience.

1 factor can mitigate the problems children are facing.
Belonging – the power of a loving caring adult.

Spread faith everywhere you go, especially with children.

Believing – The power of the Bible.

Moralistic therapeutic diesem. *google what this is teaching

What do I say when things are hard, “God is for me.”

Become – The Power of Identity – This takes believing and belonging and turns it into real life. Making choices based on your allegiance to scripture and that God is who He said He is.

God is for me!

General Session 2

Arlene Pellicane

Phones as a new baby analogy.

All screen time is not created equal.
Digital Vegetables vs. Digital Candy.
A little candy is okay, but if you’re diet is built on candy you have a declining health that affects your brains.

There are no stopping cues today with technology. TV shows just continue forever without a stopping point.
Netflix’s competition is sleep.

How do you know if your kids are in trouble.
Casual, at risk, addicted.
Causal kids play for 30 minutes of enjoyment and then can put it down.
At risk kids know they are only supposed to play on the weekends but want to play all the time.
Addicted kids skip out on family dinner to play.

Self control comes from the prefrontal cortex. That muscle needs to be flexed to give it resilient power.

To be normal in today’s day and age is not a good thing.

Script the critical move. What’s the one thing that if you did in your family would make a big difference.
No phones at the dinner table.
No phone in the bedroom at night.
Help your kids regulate.

Impress the word of God on your kids heart.

Digital candy is no way to build a life.

Ron Hunter Jr., Ph.D.
After 12 years, 270 speakers!

The Grand Canyon National Park

A picture is not the same as an experience.

How long should you visit the Grand Canyon. 

We want our church to be a place not where people come and see but where they go and be. 

Four Major Family Ministry Models

D6 Model – a philosophy not a program. Church and home working together. Curriculum is a tactic that supports the philosophy. 

We did it too cool. When seniors graduated school they graduated from the church. Siloing each ministry kingdom creates individual kingdoms. D6 movement needs to be generational caring about the current and next generation. Being intentional with “as you go” moments. What do you do with silos? We bring them into the perimeter of the church. Remove them with overlap not integration. Higher accountability and deeper study. 

Integrated Model – Recognizes the silos as a problem. Brings them into the church. Removes them with integration and see parents as the primary discipler of church and home. We need to borrow more integration especially in worship and missions trips. When God is doing something awesome they come home and show the parents but image what would happen if mom and dad when on the missions trip with them. We need intentionality but also need age specific teaching. 

Integrated Model – Recognizes the silos as a problem. Brings them into the church. Removes them with integration and see parents as the primary discipler of church and home. We need to borrow more integration especially in worship and missions trips. When God is doing something awesome they come home and show the parents but image what would happen if mom and dad when on the missions trip with them. We need intentionality but also need age specific teaching.

Adoptive Model – Not about celebrating the event itself. It’s about prepping both parents and their children. It’s not about the purity event but getting parents to model and teach this with their kids leading up to the event. This speaks far more than the event itself.

Milestones Model – peer to peer, a more mature teenager works with a less mature teenager. Older generation to younger generation. Possibly a season ahead teaching a season behind helping them navigate their next steps.

Overlap the family ministry models.
Milestone models – events over life (emphasis on birth-24)
Adoptive model – behaviors for a life practiced weekly.
D6 model – Church preps all ages for week ahead – practiced daily.
Integrated model – church preps for week ahead – practiced daily aged integrated with family first priority.

At Home – Unforgettable moments
We are doing this well at church but failing to help parents at home with these unforgettable moments.

Dr. Richard Ross – PVC Pipe and Ministry in Thirds.

What transfers faith to the next generation. Longitudinal study. The warmth of a father’s heart.

It’s easier to do church at church than to teach parents how to do church at home.
We need to be park rangers teaching parents how to do church at home every day. Give them tools, encourage them, show them.
The ranger reminds people what’s important.
Measure engagement more than we measure performance. Not attendance and offering but Bible engagements and faith talks.

You are here to teach people not just how to walk into church but how to carry out their faith outside of church.

General Session 3

Ryan Frank

Don’t just remember the why behind the what, but the who behind the what.

One of the greatest tools the enemy uses is discouragement. 

Remember the One who is with you. God is working in the lives of His people.

Exodus 3 and 4. Moses and the burning bush.

It’s often in the mundane that miracles happen. 

Excuse #1 – I’m not good enough. God was not concerned with Moses’ inabilities but his availability. 

Instead of saying, “I’m not good enough” remember WHO is with you. 

Excuse #2 – I don’t have all the answers. Remember “I AM” has sent me. 

Excuse #3 – They won’t take me seriously. Ask yourself, “What has God placed in my hand?”

Don’t over think it. Don’t make it complicated. Don’t compare it with others. Trust God.

Excuse #4 – I’m not a good public speaker. 

God is looking for someone who is humble, relying on Him, and trusting His word. 

Callings are confirmed by what God does with sub-par equipment. 

Excuse #5 – I’m desperate. You’re not alone, remember God is with you.

God seldom works when or how we expect Him to.

Sometimes God pushes us to the edge of our limit. 

You’ve got this. Trust in God and depend on His word. 

All God expects us to be is available.” 

Remember HE is the “I Am”

General Session 4

Jay Strother

The first job of a leader is to always define reality.

Fewer young adults are connected to church and that trend is growing.

If life is a cafeteria, young adults are choosing something other than our churches for their spirituality.

The young adult challenge: Our church methodology has not helped.

2nd Timothy 4:12, “Don’t let anyone look down on you because you are young, but set an example for the believers in speech, in conduct, in love, in faith and in purity.”

  1. Young adults need spiritual mentors. Paul saw Timothy as a true son in the faith.
    Do you now how much it would mean for you to speak to a young adult as Paul spoke to Timothy? Do you know how empty their tanks are?
    Cultivate a disciple making culture in your church.
    Welcome them to our tables and our lives.
  2. Young adults need a spiritual root system.
    2 Tim 1:5 I am reminded of your sincere faith, which first lived in your grandmother Lois and in your mother Eunice and, I am persuaded, now lives in you also.
    2 Tim 3:14-15 “But as for you, continue in what you have learned and have become convinced of, because you know those from whom you learned it, and how from infancy you have known the Holy Scriptures, which are able to make you wise for salvation through faith in Christ Jesus.”
  3. Young adults need to feed the fire of their spiritual gifts.
    2 Tim 1:6 For this reason I remind you to fan into flame the gift of God, which is in you through the laying on of my hands.
    Timothy was not like Paul. Call out the gifts in the younger generation.
  4. Young adults need to share in Gospel ministry.
    2 Timothy 1:8-14
    What millennials are looking for is contributing to something that matters.
    2 Tim 2:2 And the things you have heard me say in the presence of many witnesses entrust to reliable people who will also be qualified to teach others.

We all need a Paul, a Barnabas, and a Timothy.

Holy Spirt, bring to mind a Timothy for all of us. Someone we can invest in like Paul invested in Timothy.
Look for people who are fat. Faithful, Available, Teachable.

Grace Filled Sex – Dr. Tim Kimmel

We shouldn’t be ashamed to discuss what God wasn’t ashamed to create.

“If I take out the shepherd getting the sheep to go astray will be easy.” Satan

When you get married you blend your assets with your liabilities.

The key to building a resilient marriage and writing a lifelong Loe story as a couple requires a commitment to maintaining heart connection with your spouse.

  1. The ME lens.
    Phil 2:3-4
  2. The Love It Lens
    Ps 103:10
  3. The Pious Lens
    It’s hard to convince someone of their self righteousness.
    James 1:22

All 3 of these lenses are rooted in selfishness.
James 4:6b

  1. The GRACE lease
    We tend to exclude grace to salvation. Grace is for everyday.
    1 Peter 4:10
    Grace AND truth
    We must be guided by His truth and tempered by His grace.

Treat your spouse the way God treats you.
If marriage is the ultimate outlet for love and grace is its most needed ingredient, then sexual intimacy within that marriage is the ultimate test kitchen for God’s applied and active grace.

Personally honor and bless your spouse.

A grace-filled marriage gives us the power to overcome the standard ways sex is often mishandled in a marriage.

Emotional Intimacy and Physical Connection

If you want your spouse to be more interested in Emotional Intimacy you need to be more interested in Physical Connection.
If you want your spouse to be more interested in Physical Connection you need to be more interested in Emotional Intimacy.

How do you react when your spouse is different than you? Respecting the differences will enhance the sexual relationship.
Instead of allowing the differences to drive you crazy, respect them.

A grace-filled marriage helps us have a kinder and more understanding view of our spouse’s wiring when it comes to sex.

Sexually intimacy is one of the main ways men connect emotionally with their wife.

A grace-filled marriage gives our marriage enormous protection and security in the midst of a sexually contaminated culture.
1 Cor 7:5

Fight sexual temptation as a team. Help each other.

Addicts are takers not givers. They are controllers.

Be available to each other.

When it comes to everyone else, stay pure.
Have a RED light glowing. Not a green light or a yellow light.

1 Cor 7:3-4

God’s grace empowers us to keep our marriage focused and dependent on Him rather than each other.
Matthew 27:37-39

It’s not my love for God I pour over my wife, it’s God’s love for me that I pour over my wife. His love is infinite.

The secret to maintaining heart connection is to make a daily commitment to pursue your spouses heart. Make that commitment until one of you takes your last breathe.

The key to loving each other, and enjoying the sexual intimacy that comes with that is loving God most.

You have a choice to go around wounded or broken.

It is well…with my phone?
Arlene Pellicane

It is well…with my phone? Ask yourself this question. Ask your kids and spouse this question.

Your soul health and phone health are connected. 50% of 18-24 year olds report feeling depression.

The pandemic doubled screen time reports. Post pandemic, what are we going to do with the new habits we formed with technology?

Not all technology is bad, digital vegetables and digital candy.

We are reaching the devices instead of the divine. God, not google.
When my child has a fever, start with God, not google.
Psalm 121:1 “I lift up my eyes to the hills. From where does my help come?”
Kids are playing games, but it’s much harder for them to pray.
In 2020, 2.7B gamers in the world. 1 in 3 people. 45% are woman.
Guys disappear while girls play in little short spurts as they go.
What if during all the little times, you were still to know God? Reading a book? Talking?
18-35 year olds is largest population who game. Those years they are forming life decisions on calling.
Think about David – 1 Samuel 17:33-37 “But David said to Saul, “Your servant has been keeping his father’s sheep. When a lion or a bear came and carried off a sheep from the flock, 35 I went after it, struck it and rescued the sheep from its mouth. When it turned on me, I seized it by its hair, struck it and killed it. 36 Your servant has killed both the lion and the bear; this uncircumcised Philistine will be like one of them, because he has defied the armies of the living God. 37 The Lord who rescued me from the paw of the lion and the paw of the bear will rescue me from the hand of this Philistine.”

Position your kids so when they leave your homes they aren’t addicted to games. This starts when they’re young.
2 Sam 5:4 – David was King at 30. What could your child do at 30 without distraction and Digital junk food and an idol iPhone.
This idol worship is a gradual drift where you become so attached to something other than God. When holding a phone, you’re competing for attention and heart affections.

1950’s experiment with kittens in the dark for the beginning of their life. Later out in the light for 1 hour a day in a little cylinder. Then take them out into the world. They would run into objects, you can touch their nose without them pulling back, and they didn’t chase anything. Later they didn’t change. Those early weeks of development changed them forever.
Kids in the cocoon of digital world. Then later so hard to look face to face and be a friend, have an interview, or fall in love.

Nomophobia – fear of being without your smart phone.
Iowa state university study.
58% of men and 47% of women suffer from the phobia, and an additional 9% feel stressed when their mobile phones are off. 55% of those surveyed cited keeping in touch with friends or family as the main reason that they got anxious when they could not use their mobile phones.
Feeling of dread without your device.
Uncomfortable, annoyed, anxious, feeling weird because you don’t know what to do.

These devices are not neutral.
Watch the Social Dilemma on Netflix

We must put people before devices.
Do you think your spouse is more interesting than your phone? If there was a hidden camera that watched you all day, would someone else conclude this?
Do you actually put people before tech? Do your eyes show this? Does a notification show this?

Still face experiment: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=apzXGEbZht0
Connection is easily repaired.
What if this talk was given while the speaker was holding a phone in their hand. Eye contact makes a huge difference.
When you are still faced and phone in hand, you are communicating you are not as important to me as my device.
Do the Pivot. When people come into your airspace, put you phone down. Eye contact communicates a world of difference.
Courtesy of people must come before devices.

5 A+ Skills (ScreenKidsBook.com)
Anger Management

It takes 10,000 hours to become an experts
Today with their devices kids are becoming experts in Amusement, Entertainment, Immoral Thinking and Jokes
Do your kids know how to receive love and fill their love bucket?
The deceive always gives you what you want. It never asks you to do hard things or to do chores. It creates self absorbed idol worshippers.

Strengthen your attention muscle through reading.

No phones at mealtime.
No devices overnight in rooms
Digital sabbath
Delay devices
Time limits

Screen Kids Book – Screen Kids and Grandparenting Screen Kids Offer Help for Raising Digitally-Balanced, Well-Behaved Children in a Tech-Driven World.

Parents Rising: 8 Strategies for Raising Kids Who Love God, Respect Authority, and Value What’s Right

Take courage to stand up.
Don’t go with the flow…where the flow is going, is not very good.
Do this in a confidence and relaxed way. Be fun at home. Don’t make it all about what kids can’t do.

Millennial Parents of Faith in a Post-2020 World

Michayla White

Thank you for enduring, thank you for not giving up. 

Every generation matters, every generation is unique. Generations are a construct we created to help us understand one another better. 

Goals: Discover and Consider Implications for our ministry. 

Establish who we are talking about. Share results rom our survey. 

A lot can happen in 15 years. Research defines Millennials span to be rom 1981-1996. Implications for how we move through life together. What’s common behaviors we need to be aware of? 

Who are they? Parents are boomers, most diverse generation, largest living, highly educated, digital natives, majority of current workforce. 

Older cohort and younger cohort changes. 

The oldest Millennials are turning 40 this year. 

What is shaping them? The Context. The Narrative. 

Clinton Scandal, OJ Simpson, 911, Princes Diana, Columbine Shooting, Housing Bust, Recessions, War, Y2K – shaping economics. 

For the church – rise of media and years of abuse coming to light. Witness to many cracks in the church. Many were victims of the abuse. 

The millennial parents of faith research study by INCM – insights for how this group is navigating and processing things like parenting, faith, culture, the church, discipleship. 

Sample Data: Majority USA/Canadian Sample. 94% married. 2-3 children average per home. Children’s ages: Primarily early childhood- elementary. Majority working FT or PT, 80% working, 20% working from home or seeking. Majority birth year: 1980-1989. 

The Millennial Generation has been splitting in two. Jason Dorsey research. 

Mega-llennials, Me-llennials. 

1981-1989 , 1990-1996 The birth of the internet changed and created a split here. 

Majority of the people taking the survey were in the older group. 

71% grew up in a home that valued faith and God. 

89% described their relationship with God as a devoted follower of Jesus. 

How they view the church? What do they want with their child’s relationship with the church? 

Nomads, Prodigals, Exiles: Barna Group Research 

Nomads, most common group of millennials, Christian background but walked away from the local church, identity as Christians 

Prodigals: Lost faith but claim no Christian belief. 

Exiles have a tough time feeling at home in a church setting but chose to remain in the institutional church context.  

91% say my faith is important to me and influences how I parent

93% say they want their kids to grow up to know, love, and serve Jesus. The desire is absolutely there. 

23% say I make reading my bible a regular part of my day.  Highly Agree.

36% say  I make reading my bible a regular part of my day.  Agree.

22 % highly agree they are in a discipling relationship. 

37% agree they are in a discipling relationship. 

The degree they are experiencing relational discipleship is the same as they are reading their bible. 

58% say church is big support to them as a parent

90% say they attend church regularly as in 2-3 times a month. 

But HOW are they engaging church? Right now, 68% are in person. 20% online if open. 7% if not open. 5% not attending at all. 

Anecdotal feedback did show an appreciation for the online experience if someone is sick, baby is having a hard morning…they appreciate the online option. 

Strong response for in person is the prevailing preference for HOW they want to gather. 

Throughout the pandemic, did you regularly engage the virtual children’s ministry programming made available to you from your church? 

Yes 56%, No 36%, 9% not offered. 

“While online church exists for us, it doesn’t work for us. In person, or not at all.”

Church for millennials is community, it’s what they want for their children, not to put them in front of another screen. Online church is not the same.

Children were too young to engage. Attention span did not hold up, tired of screens, zoom fatigue, it’s not the same. 

What do we currently feel comfortable with? 

Spring 202171% would love to be in person. 21% online. 8% are in the category of watching covid numbers to determine decisions. 

Summer VBS 67% in person, 15% virtual/at home. 

Lots of chatter to “get ready for September” but don’t miss the summer to get ready for the fall. We should be moving. 

Fall 81% in person 9% online. 

Parents are paying attention to the schools. If the school is closed, why are you open and vice versa. 

They are also paying attention (the more cautious group), are all your ministries following the same policies. Do the student ministry leaders follow what the kids ministry? Because youth ministry wasn’t following the same protocol they didn’t want to bring even their kids to the church. They were all coming home to the same home and this really mattered to parents in the survey. 

When it comes to decision making for commitment to your church home. 

1: Theological alignment (or ideological alignment) 

2: Preaching 

3: Children’s Ministry.

They will endure preaching and worship IF their child is thriving in the kids ministry. 

What do they value most?
Being Known – people who know their children’s names and show an interest in them. 

Relationships – having people in our kids lives who disciple and mentor them.

Communication – having good communication about what our kids are learning about. *Millennial fathers are the most engaged fathers in a long time. Affirm those fathers who are showing up!

Leadership – I value knowing the children’s ministry director or pastor. 

Safety and Security 

Expectation of Millennial parents when rising a church with their kids. 

Safety and Security are non-negotiable. 

They should know your policy and see you are following them. 

Ethos: Hospitality and inclusion. Longing for community. If they can’t get it, then their kids are are going to get it. 

They are testing out how you feel. 

#1 concern of Millennial parents when visit a church with their kids. 

If a child keeps showing up with bad behavior, do you get to know why and help?

What are the biggest questions they are wrestling with? 

Child’s behavior 27%

Child’s relationships 21%

Child’s spirituality 26%

Wholistic development and behavior. The affect of screen time on kids. Screen Reliant Kids. 

The next part of the survey was heavy. Develop compassion and mercy and sight for what parents are navigating. 

Their children’s Biblical worldview, “I’m afraid culture will impact our kids by confusing them about what they’ve been raised to believe but the world is saying the opposite.” 

Concern for the confusion their kids are facing. 

LGBTQ+ and Sexuality #1 Concern

“The emphasis on gender rights now and LGBTQ+ topics..I don’t believe the church is providing guidance to address this with their children. 

Social Media #2 Concern

I don’t want my kids to get caught up. I want to protect them from the harm and anxiety it is causing. 

Kids are still being bullied through google docs chat feature. It’s so hard to protect them. 

Cancel Cutlure #3

This is a different form of bullying and they are concerned for the implications on their kids. 

Values and theology 

They are afraid was the prevailing thought. This should cause us to have compassion. 

Culture is polarizing and kids will have to navigate this with a Biblical worldview. 

What are they hopeful for right now? Socially they are hopeful for what it looks like to be with people in an actual community. 

Hopeful for a greater empath. 

A desire for revival. Want or believe it to happen. 

Longing for greater community and connection. 

A commitment to healthier paces and better priorities. Honor this and help them set healthy rhythms. 

What does this all mean? 

Last question we asked them? What does it mean to be a parent? 

Millennial parents of faith love their kids and feel deep responsibility for their role as a parent. The vast majority recognize they are entrust by God to steward their kids. 

They also expressed this feels like a lot! 

Something happened. W

What we might be working towards…

When Millennials were growing up in the church christian education had seen a rise of programs for ministry. Biblically illiterate. Learn how to walk with Jesus on a Tuesday. Show them. 

Reading the Bible is like eating a mango. It’s messy, something weird in the middle, it might hurt you. It’s confusing unless you DO know how to open a mango. Your fruit world is changed forever. 

Teach parents HOW to open the Bible. They can open it but they’ll face questions about the thing in the middle. Give them someone who they can talk with and show them. 

We are partners in the discipleship of kids. Parents and Home. This works when parents know what it looks like to follow Jesus on a Tuesday. Millennial parents of faith have a gap. They need spiritual mothers and fathers to come alongside them to help disciple them. You might invite someone once and they say no, they are testing you with a question mark. Ask 12 times for them to come over. Do you really care about me? They need the pursuit. The Jesus level pursuit. Jesus went all the way to the tax collectors home and sick girl. Few people saw it. It wasn’t for scalability. It was for that person to have a transformative experience with him. Instead of programs and events, maybe it looks more like dinner. 

They need to experience discipleship relationships right alongside their children. They aren’t equipped to do what we are asking them to do. Knowledge does not equal relationships. 

Invest in their children and you will experience their trust. 

Invite them over for dinner. Get involved in their everyday life. Pass the baton of making disciples. Help the elderly in the church to help families. They aren’t coasting, mobilize them. 




Volunteer Development Breakout Notes #D62021

*Note: I was asked to share my notes from this breakout. Sorry they aren’t fully spelled out. If it interests you to hear the whole thing reach out to D6family.com to learn about a digital download.

Begin with the end in mind.

Job description found in Bible

Ephesians 4:11-12

“Now these are the gifts Christ gave to the church: the apostles, the prophets, the evangelists, and the pastors and teachers. Their responsibility is to equip God’s people to do his work and build up the church, the body of Christ.”

We Belong to One Another

Romans 12:4-5 “Just as our bodies have many parts and each part has a special function, so it is with Christ’s body. We are many parts of one body, and we all belong to each other.”

Mr Potato Head

Right Person…in the right Place…at the right Time…for the right reasons. 

Right Person: 

Example: Tonya vs. Laurie – Small group leader to coach promotion. 

Job description and check list 

What is their career?

What have they done in the past? 

What do they want to do?

Romans 12:6-8 “In his grace, God has given us different gifts for doing certain things well. So if God has given you the ability to prophesy, speak out with as much faith as God has given you. If your gift is serving others, serve them well. If you are a teacher, teach well. If your gift is to encourage others, be encouraging. If it is giving, give generously. If God has given you leadership ability, take the responsibility seriously. And if you have a gift for showing kindness to others, do it gladly.”

“God has given each of you a gift from his great variety of spiritual gifts. Use them well to serve one another” (1 Peter 4:10, NLT).

Right Place: Ian Nygren Example

Have you ever tried to put someone on stage who wasn’t built for it? I remember asking one of my sold out volunteers if he wanted to give announcements a try. Standing six and a half feet tall, he towers over the kids as he held a sheet of paper and took a deep breath. The man who could easily pass for Goliath, trembled as he began to speak. Before the first word came out of his mouth, I knew, even the kids knew, this was going to be painful. After what seemed like the longest two minutes of a church service anywhere, I thanked him and reassured him he would not have to step out of his small group leader role again. I was incredibly thankful for his willingness to serve, but we both knew this was not where God had blessed him. 

Next Steps, next RIGHT steps. 

Onboarding New Volunteers Process – D6 Podcast Ep62 


How long does it take you to bring someone onto the team? 

Do they know what you want them to do and how to do it? 

Have you been praying for the people you want to promote? 

Do they know the next steps? 

How long to promote them?

Right Time: season of life, commitment level 

Are people serving in the wrong ministry? Are they serving in too many ministries? 

Tucker example. Started with a band problem that revealed a potential future threat. 

Monday Night Re-engage, Tuesday night young adults, Wednesday Night 2 youth services, Thursday night church and then Thursday night late night college ministry, Friday and Saturday events, and then Sunday multiple services. So if you could play guitar…or run tech…busy! 

Getting the right person, in the right place, at the right time requires coaching and modeling. Train:

– I do, you watch

– I do, you help

– You do, I help

– You do, I watch

– You do, you and I train someone else

1st string, 2nd string, 3rd string. Modeling. Let them lead. Jeremy Pullen example and Tyler’s help. Assistants. Person on stage. Second person to hand prizes. Eventually give them a microphone. Eventually let them lead part. Give feedback all along the way. Love them by sharing feedback. Candor. Correct in love. 


What’s the gap between where someone is and where you want them to be? 

How to close the gap? 

For the Right Reason: Colton example. 

Wanting stage time vs. gift of preaching. 

Fruit, not open to feedback. Not prepared. Irritated when not scheduled. 

Contrasting this with Alec

Practiced, on time, asked questions mid week, came in knowing his part. 

Afterward requesting feedback and feedback from the kids. Learning, growing. 

Excited to bring more people on the team.

Producing fruit that lasts. 

AND for the right reason, FROM YOU!

Not to build your kingdom. Not to have big numbers. 

Wanting more for people than from people. 

Are your volunteers serving Jesus or serving you?!?!

When they show up late do you communicate they missed out on some awesome relationship time with the kids or that you were in a pinch. 

When a teacher isn’t prepared do you communicate the missed opportunity to share Christ or how it makes your ministry look bad?

A good way to see if you want more for your people than from your people would be to look at your training. Like, if you do a preservice VIP. 

VIP Meetings

To discuss how to make churches stronger by making homes stronger.

Always thinking: church, home, job

Lead Small 5 Principles. Be Present

Show Up Constantly – Make sure they know you’re going to be there. 

In small group constantly, at home you’re showing up mentally by putting down your phone, at work you are present in your meetings and leaving email at the door. 

Show up Randomly: Small group leader showing up to a ball game. A parent writing a note and sneaking it into their kids back pack. A worker noticing another employee struggling and asking if you can help. 

Right Pieces/Person…in the right Place…at the right Time…for the right Reasons. 

Any area – Today I serve my church through the role of Executive Pastor. 

7 companies

3.25 Million

Serve 81 staff members

27k Robin (housing) right people

290k Bill (ppp) right place

80k Steven (sign) right time

14k Andy (roof) right reason

Your role is probably different, therefore your Right Person…in the right Place…at the right Time…for the right Reasons will be different. 

Your right person might be a 16 year old girl, many are overlooking but you see their gift and know they can do big things for the kingdom. 

“You can make excuses or you can make progress but you can’t make both.” Craig Groeschel 

Don’t allow excuses to creep in, let’s work through a couple of questions and during this time only think about your progress, what can you control? 

Would my team say I cared more for them as a person than I do for them in the role they fulfill?

Volunteer Development is all about relationships. 

Recruit, release, retain – ALL Relationships 

Do I know the people on my team better today than I did last week?

Do your people know what to do and how to do it?

Do your leaders feel trained? 

Training Events like Global KidMin Day

Do your leaders know their next step?

Do they fit not just with what you have today but what is coming in the future. 

For example a host holding a script. 

Books or book studies 

Jim Wideman – Stretch 

Do your leaders know your heart? 

Communicate. When you’re tired of saying it they are beginning to hear it. 

Shirt example

Are you building a culture intentionally?

Ex: Going the extra mile. 

Are you writing hand written note? 

Are you bringing them soup when they call out sick?
Are you reaching out if they don’t show up. FIRST STEP IN LONG LINE.

Do your leaders have the authority to make decisions? 

Give permission for your team to be proactive and solve problems. 

Train them by asking what do you think we can do. 

Give responsibility and help them assume responsibility to own it. 

So what is your next step? 

What can you do to start intentionally developing your volunteers? 

Don’t make excuses, AND don’t worry. 

Worry wastes time and takes you away from your mission. 

Jesus said in His sermon “Look at the birds. They don’t plant or harvest or store food in barns, for your heavenly Father feeds them. And aren’t you far more valuable to him than they are? Can all your worries add a single moment to your life?” Matthew 6:26-27 

Eat the frog first

D6 Talk and Podcast

15-20 minutes. The day and time of your podcast is: Thursday—3:00 pm. If for some reason you have a conflict with this time, please let me know immediately.

“You are here to discuss how to make churches stronger by making homes stronger.”

1. How/When did you feel called into ministry?

5th Grade gave life to Christ – gave my life to Christ. Asking what He wants for me. 

Camp story. 

2. In your years of ministry, how have you seen the culture of the church change? How have you been a part of that change at your church?

Globally – church attendance, and acceleration from covid. 

Locally – community center

3. For churches that may be “stuck in a rut” or just doing “business as usual,” what encouragement/advice do you have for their leadership team? In what ways can they assess their strategies?

Jim Wideman “A rut is just a grave with the ends blown out.” If you’re feeling stuck remember Philippians 1:6 “And I am certain that God, who began the good work within you, will continue his work until it is finally finished on the day when Christ Jesus returns.”

If God’s not done with you, ask Him what’s next. Take time to step away from the hustle, be still, and listen. Ask for wisdom and discernment. 

We felt this as a staff as we entered 2021. Took a day to be still. 

Listen for one thing. 

Accountability for one thing. 

And to carry the weight of that one thing or whatever God is calling you to. 

There are things in the church that are mine to carry? God’s to carry? And other people to carry? I feel the most anxious or most like I’m spinning my wheels when I carry what God hasn’t placed in my hands. 

4. How has the past year’s pandemic opened your eyes to even newer ways the church can minister to both regular attenders and those in the community?

The small faithful ways to serve the church. 

Picking up the phone. Visiting someone’s house. Taking a meal. 

Gotten so used to the big programs of ministry and neglected the simple ways to show the truth by our actions. 

A Digital Drive To Your House – Make your ministry stand out online!

When you visit a restaurant, do you check their social media before walking through the door? Families in your area are searching for your ministry. Are they enticed by what they see?

Consider the analogy of your house when you think about social media. The average person in your town has no idea about your house, but maybe if they were looking for the perfect color of red, your front door might catch their eye. From the road, your house can stand out, and likewise, from a simple search on the web, your ministry can catch someone’s eye. 

Take a minute and google your ministry. Do you like what you see? Would someone who has never been, be compelled to visit? You can change that. Take a minute to take ownership of your Google listing. Update pictures, give accurate information, and make sure your service times are up to date. 

Google is where most people start but maybe you go the extra mile to create a Facebook page. A Facebook page is like a yellow pages article or a place people can stop in when they are looking for information for your ministry. Continuing with the house analogy, updating your Facebook page is like cutting your shrubs or raking your leaves, it sure makes your house more inviting. 

And, why stop at a Facebook page? Instagram can be a goldmine for your ministry if you take some time to post some quality pictures with a local hashtag. This is like cutting your grass with a fancy grid pattern, you’ll turn heads. 

But these are all for someone driving by your house looking at it from the road. Once someone accepts your invitation it’s like they begin walking down your driveway. These are the people who like what they see randomly, so they begin to search deeper. 

Once someone finds your church on google and heads over to your website do they like what they see? Do they stop to read the words you have written on your site or have you written an overwhelming amount? If you don’t read the words on your site, I guarantee you a visitor isn’t going to take the time to read it. Maybe instead of words, you make a one-minute video clip to create a visual experience? 

Or if updating a website isn’t your thing, consider updating the second largest search engine in the world, YouTube. YouTube is where many people go to learn more about your ministry. Do they like what they see? If you’re looking for an example, search for “Mosaic Kids” on YouTube. 

After someone feels comfortable walking down your driveway, perhaps they might feel comfortable hanging out in your backyard? Facebook Groups, are the backyard of social media. Facebook groups naturally establish community. For those who are looking at sticking around a while, send them an invitation to your ministries Facebook group. Remember though, no one likes the guy at the backyard party who only talks about himself, so treat the group like you are hanging out around a grill. Ask questions, get to know people, and maybe even play a game or two. 

The backyard is also where people have deeper connections. It wouldn’t be weird to send out some regular emails to people letting them know of the next barbecue. Email isn’t the traditional form of social media people think about, but it is a great tool in your toolbox. At your next big event, find a way to strategically gather the email address of those in attendance. 

And finally, once someone feels very comfortable and like part of the family, they may even make their way into the house. Inside the house is where the most personal communication can take place. Inside the house is where you can consider using specific email lists, Instagram close friends, or even the largest social network in the world. Do you know what network I’m talking about? I’ll give you a clue. My username is 404.788.9487. Yes, text messaging! One of the most underutilized social networks is text messaging but be careful as it is also the most intimate. 

Take some time today to evaluate how you are doing to digitally welcome people and move them from the road to your driveway, to your backyard, and finally into your home. Are there things you can do to improve this process? Write down some next steps on your calendar and let’s use social media as a tool to build the kingdom! 

Originally Published in KidzMatter Magazine Winter 2020 – Issue 71

Preteen Book Review: Let Go and Run Beside

Have you ever started a book and loved it so much you bought it for all your friends before you even finished it? Well, if you work with preteens you need to check out the new book, “Let Go and Run Beside” by Sean Sweet!

In this book, Sean will give you the ten essentials of Intentional Preteen Ministry. 
1. Let Go
2. Run Beside
3. Invite Preteens to Take Risks in a Safe Environment
4. Give Choices and Share Power
5. Implement Active Learning Strategies
6. Facilitate Reflection and Response
7. Disciple Through Questions
8. Build a Foundation for Identity Formation
9. Persevere and Overcome Obstacles
10. Take Your Next Step

Some of my favorite quotes so far:

“As difficult as you may find it to be around preteens, it’s often more difficult to be a preteen.” 

Here’s an equation that I found useful when observing preteen behavior:
= Preteen Behavior

“Likewise, preteens are ready for us to ‘let go of the bike.’ They have new mental abilities that they’ve never had before, abilities which will allow them to connect with Jesus in new and meaningful ways, but we must make room for them to do this.”

“He’s ready developmentally, but not experientially.”

“They have a new desire for independence and autonomy. Are we going to stifle that or make room for it?”

If you are looking for ways to encourage, pastor, and love preteens during this critical phase of their life, go pick up the book for you and a couple of your preteen leaders. All the information can be found at: https://fourfivesix.lpages.co/let-go-book/ 

Hacks On How To Win With Your Kidmin Social Media (Technology Track)

When you visit a restaurant, do you check their social media before walking through the door? Families in your area are searching for your kids ministry. Are they enticed by what they see? Let’s work together to make you kidmin social media stand out!

House Analogy

The average person in your town has no idea about your house. But if they drive by maybe you can catch their eye. 


The most public – Just the top view

Google – Southern Hills, the Church at City Station – Have you taken ownership of your listing so you have up to date information? Columbus Day, COVID? Are your services times accurate? Are your pictures new? Is it inviting? 

Facebook Page – Cornerstone Church https://www.facebook.com/cstone.central (notice video banner) Is it a billboard or does it make me want to visit? 

Instagram – KidSpring at NewSpring Church https://www.instagram.com/kidspring/ (notice link in bio) Use some hashtags for your city. 

Do these entice someone to look deeper? 


Website – Christ Church of the Valley – https://ccv.church/ministries/kids (notice the 1 minute video clip AND how few words.) 

Youtube – Mosaic Kids – https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLFhpcdq6jK_Z3Tab0wIqquQ7UjSPqlx-W (notice quality and video thumbnails)

Back Yard:

Facebook Groups – Are you establishing a community? Think I Love Kidmin. www.ilovekidmin.com Resources and community, NOT all day every day advertisements. 

Email List Broad – Will you gather people’s information at your fall family event? Can you use this to invite to the next event or Easter? 

Living Room: 

Text Group – 

Instagram Close Friends – 

Email List Specific – 

Hacks – You can’t cheat it

But you can be smart: Times of day. Quality ENGAGING content. 

Kids – Don’t unintentionally encourage kids to break the law. 

COPPA Children’s Online Privacy Protection Act imposes certain requirements on operators of websites or online services directed to children under 13 years of age, and on operators of other websites. Facebook or Insta 13. 

Don’t put yourself against parents. 

Volunteers – Jim Wideman: The Three Dog Night Rule – One is the loneliest number that you’ll ever do.

Google Drive – Give full access to materials. 

Multi use the same materials – fb/insta – different audience 

Sharing posts to story at a later date. (Some people only watch stories)

Ryan’s Strategy. 

Be where your people are.

Ex: Twitter – For us waste of time. FB page vs FB group. Kids vs Main Church accounts.

Do your kids know where to find you? I mean, are you on YouTube. 

Use pictures – pictures of people. Schedule someone at least quarterly to just give you a fresh library. 

canva.com 9.95/month OR create small and crop

Keep the main thing the main thing. It’s about making disciples.


Volunteer On-Boarding Kidmin Nation Mega-Con

Volunteer On-Boarding: A Step By Step Guide (Volunteer Track)

What if you could seamlessly move someone through the process of joining your team? What if you brought someone in so smoothly, they were set up from the beginning to be retained for years to come? Come learn how to develop a strategy to onboard your volunteers.

Matthew 9:35-38 Jesus traveled through all the towns and villages of that area, teaching in the synagogues and announcing the Good News about the Kingdom. And he healed every kind of disease and illness. When he saw the crowds, he had compassion on them because they were confused and helpless, like sheep without a shepherd. He said to his disciples, “The harvest is great, but the workers are few. So pray to the Lord who is in charge of the harvest; ask him to send more workers into his fields.”

Link to Notes and Additional Documentation: https://www.dropbox.com/sh/bwh9guwmw6uh6pu/AABrcKTcFSwVVHIBDtdG9NoMa?dl=0 

Announcing The Kids Ministry Exchange

The future of your kids ministry may feel uncertain. But we can figure it out together. To help your ministry this year, Orange is putting on the Kids Ministry Exchange!

In this two-day, online event they are bringing together counselors, researchers, pastors, teachers, experts, and thought leaders, so you can discover the practical information you need to help you bring hope to your community.

4 main sessions with national thought leaders

20+ breakouts and live Q&As with ministry experts

4 opportunities for virtual roundtable discussion

1 Digital Exhibit Hall with the best ministry exchange

. . . and 3 bathroom breaks

I hope you will gather your nextgen team for this online learning experience! To learn more check out https://thinkorange.com/kids-ministry-exchange/

5 Powerful Verses to Help You Lead up in Nextgen


How do you lead up in NextGen ministry? 

Any idea on how you can get buy-in from leadership? 

One of the biggest challenges you face as a NextGen leader is gaining the buy-in from leadership without necessarily having the position of influence in your church. For those of you who have a plan and vision that exceeds your authority, here are four courageous challenges and Scripture to help you lead up in NextGen ministries. 

Be Faithful in the Little Things

“The master said, ‘Well done, my good and faithful servant. You have been faithful in handling this small amount, so now I will give you many more. Let’s celebrate together!’” (Matthew 25:23, NLT) In Jesus’ parable of the three servants, He shows us what it means to faithfully steward whatever has been entrusted to us. Whether you are given leadership over a single budget line item or an entire department’s spending, the best way to influence the future decisions of the budget is to faithfully steward what you’ve been given. When you control your spending, keep track of every receipt, and can show how you used the church’s money to do amazing ministry, you show how you can set the direction for future spending. 

Be Loyal to the Team 

“Don’t look out only for your own interests, but take an interest in others, too.” (Philippians 2:4, NLT) Are you leading for the benefit of others or yourself? In “How to Lead When You’re Not in Charge” Clay Scroggins asks, “Are you the type of leader that makes others better?” Being a leader worth following means you lead out of your influence with others not your position with others. When your actions inspire everyone around you to imagine more and to become more, you naturally begin to lead up. In contrast, when you look out for yourself and your position, you push people away and extinguish joy in your workplace. 

Choose Love

“Since God chose you to be the holy people he loves, you must clothe yourselves with tenderhearted mercy, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience. Make allowance for each other’s faults, and forgive anyone who offends you. Remember, the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others. Above all, clothe yourselves with love, which binds us all together in perfect harmony. And let the peace that comes from Christ rule in your hearts. For as members of one body you are called to live in peace. And always be thankful.” (Colossians 3:12-15, NLT) Your leader is not perfect, your team is not perfect, and you are not perfect. Choose today to accept those around you, flaws and all. Nothing stands out more in this broken world, like someone who chooses love. 

Be Dedicated to the Mission

“So let’s not get tired of doing what is good. At just the right time we will reap a harvest of blessing if we don’t give up.” (Galatians 6:9, NLT) Scroggins defines ambition as “that strong desire we have to make something or to achieve something, even when it takes great effort, focus, and determination.” To lead up, you must not give up. Focus on what you can control and make it great. Don’t allow unimportant things to wear you down and get in the way of what God has called you to accomplish. Consider even visually posting the mission where you and your team will daily see what you are aiming towards. 

Above All, Guard Your Heart

“This is a trustworthy saying: ‘If someone aspires to be a church leader, he desires an honorable position.’ So a church leader must be a man whose life is above reproach. He must be faithful to his wife. He must exercise self-control, live wisely, and have a good reputation. He must enjoy having guests in his home, and he must be able to teach. He must not be a heavy drinker or be violent. He must be gentle, not quarrelsome, and not love money. He must manage his own family well, having children who respect and obey him. For if a man cannot manage his own household, how can he take care of God’s church?” (1 Timothy 3:1-5, NLT). Nothing will make you lose influence or discredit your leadership faster than sin. You might not be in charge of the whole organization, but you are in charge of yourself. What thoughts do you need to take captive to obey Christ? Where have you allowed yourself to drift and need to get yourself back on track? Repent and choose right now to walk in obedience.

21 NEW Games For Your KidMin

You’re here because you’re probably looking for some fresh games for your kid’s ministry! I am right there with you! Finding games that work in a zoom call and live is hard. I was looking for fresh games and decided to just start making some of my own to share with the kidmin community. Here are descriptions and links to make things easier for you!

Zoom Games:

This on-screen game asks if you would rather this, or that? Choose your answers and see what your friends say. Lots of laughs to be had while playing this game!
Would You Rather Quarantine Edition

Each person competes in these 15 family challenges to earn points towards the gold medal! You could do this game on your next Zoom call, church service, or even send it to your families as an at home challenge! Games include things like the Straw Fridge Challenge, Back Slide Race, and Social Distance Challenge!
Family Quarantine Olympics

In this Zoom game, kids compete to be the last kid on the Zoom call! You will share several challenges. If they complete the challenge, they stay on. If they fail to do the task in time, they are out! Challenges include things like: Do your best Fortnite dance! Balance on one leg for the rest of the call! …and 13 more.
Last One Standing

You start with both hands raised and then you have to put a hand down if the statement read, for example: “You ran out of toilet paper” is true for you. The last person with a hand raised wins the game!
Hand Down If Quarantine Edition

This fun On-Screen Scavenger Hunt game is perfect to do when the kids are stuck inside the house!
At Home Scavenger Hunt

This is the second version of the original Would You Rather? Quarantine Edition On Screen Game! This game asks if you would rather this, or that? Choose your answers and see what your friends say.
Would You Rather Quarantine 2nd Edition

In this game, the kids test their skills by seeing if they can guess what an object is while it is zoomed in! It will slowly zoom out until the entire picture is revealed. This game will work great on Zoom. This game will also double as a way to give bored kids ideas of ways to have fun at home!
Zoomed In Quarantine Edition

This trivia game has 12 questions all about toilet paper. Test your toilet paper history knowledge in this fun game!
Toilet Paper Trivia

Best Selling:

This game is perfect for Zoom or large group settings. Kids will have fun trying to figure out what animal is making the sound played in the video. Lots of laughs and amazement will ensue!

Name That Sound – Animal Edition

Your kids are going to love this video-based extreme game! Everyone can vote if they think the person on the clip will make it or break it. Make it or Break It will work on Zoom or in a room full of kids! The kids can vote “Make It” by giving two thumbs up or “Break It” by making an X with their arms.

Make It or Break It Volume 1

In Version 2 of the original Make it or Break It, everyone can vote if they think the person on the clip will make it or break it. Make it or Break It will work on Zoom or in a room full of kids! The kids can vote “Make It” by giving two thumbs up or “Break It” by making an X with their arms.

Make It or Break It Volume 2

Which of your kids has the best memory? This on-screen game challenges players to remember a sequence of colors with sounds to see who can make it the longest. If anyone successfully remembers all 20, they are officially a genius.

The Memory Game

In this game, the kids test their skills by seeing if they can guess what an object is while it is zoomed in! It will slowly zoom out until the entire picture is revealed. This game will work great on Zoom or with a large group of kids!

Zoomed In

Great Games For Church:

In this fun on-screen game, kids guess with their thumbs if they think the bible trivia answer is more or less!
More or Less Bible Edition Volume 1

Even more of this fun on-screen game, kids guess with their thumbs if they think the bible trivia answer is more or less!
More or Less Bible Edition Volume 2

This game is all about hands! You start with both hands up, and put a hand down if the statement that is said is true for you. The last person with a hand raised wins!
Hand Down If

This game is perfect for Zoom or large group settings. Preschoolers will have fun trying to figure out what animal is making the sound played in the video. Lots of laughs and amazement will ensue!
Name That Sound – Preschool Animal Edition

Seasonal Games:

In this fun game, kids vote if they think the joke is funny or a fail!
Dad Jokes – Funny or Fail

In this fun quiz, kids answer 10 trivia questions about famous dads in the Bible! Do you know which dad was rendered mute until his son was born?
Famous Dad’s of the Bible

In this fun on screen game, kids guess with their thumbs if they think the answer is more or less!
More or Less Mother’s Day Edition 

In this fun game, kids guess which famous dad said it! “I went to kindergarten, I know how the alphabet works.” – Bob Parr or Mr. Incredible?

Which Dad Said It?

Hey KidMin friends, if you would like for a specific game to be created, let me know. I might just be able to make that happen for you!

Every Generation Needs a New Revolution #OC20 Notes


Some people will never admit they changed their minds. Every generation needs a new revolution. – Reggie Joiner

Have you ever changed your mind?

If you could go back and visit the 20-year-old version of yourself what would the interview look like? What would you tell them about how you changed your mind? What advice would you give them? 

How have you changed your mind? How have you changed your mind back? 

Politics? Coffee? Enneagram? 

“People who change their mind, in many ways, are my heroes.” 

What would it look like if we could just created a climate and a culture where we were all honest about changing our mind in a way that’s healthy. 

When someone changes their mind it convinces me they are adaptable, honest, vulnerable, and human. 

If you don’t know what to do, ask yourself the question, “Why did you start doing what you did?” 

When you remember WHY, you will realize it’s OK to change your mind. 

If you’re going to be a leader that’s going to lead through change, you have to be willing to change in order to spotlight and highlight what never changes. 

When you change and when you change your mind, it doesn’t mean your soft or indecisive, it means you can learn, dream, grow, forgive, have empathy, be a leader and be trusted to lead change. 

Paul was someone who changed in a radical way. Anti-Christian but changed. The radical conversion of Paul points to the reality of Jesus. 

Paul would say, “Sometimes it takes a crisis before you can see.”

Paul changed his mind about the Old Testament because of Jesus. Paul changed his mind about BBQ. Paul changed his mind about Peter. Peter was still difficult because Peter had a hard time changing his mind. 

Paul changed his mind about the temple, circumcision, Barnabas, races, nations, and women. Paul was someone who changed his mind. 

A powerful dichotomy with his story and his life. It’s okay to change your mind. It’s important to change your mind. 

Paul changed his mind about people who don’t believe the way he believes. Paul changed his mind about love. 

1 Corinthians 13 is such an interesting idea because of Paul. He wrote a letter so that he can say to a church that sometimes you get confused. Sometimes you forget that what you do needs to be connected to a why and I want to give you a crystal clear why. 

When you remember WHY, you’ll have a FILTER to evaluate everything you do. Paul’s list was different than their list. So what if you preach the truth, without love it doesn’t matter. 

One of the most earth-shattering moments was when Paul said, “If you have FAITH that can move a mountain but you don’t have love, it adds up to nothing.” Paul prioritizes love over faith. A new measurement. That Love Does and Love Wins. His list isn’t about doctrine, worship style, or the church but about love. 

Do you want to evaluate your church? Here’s the list. Love It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. 

The mic drop was “these three things remain; faith, hope, and love. And to put an exclamation mark he clarifies it again by saying the greatest of these is love. 

It’s almost as if Paul knew the difference of faith without love and faith with love. How people can use faith without love to justify their actions but when you put love in the mix it keeps everything in check. 

When you give kids a faith, it needs to be anchored to love. And hope needs to be tied to love because faith or hope without love doesn’t go anywhere. 

Even the great commission with the absence of love doesn’t make as much sense. 

“You can’t make the right kind of disciples if you don’t really love your neighbor.” 

The why of your mission, the great commission, is the why driven by love. 

Most people aren’t looking or a community of faith, they are looking for a community. Then they will listen to what you say about faith but first community. 

When you remember WHY, you lead others to reimagine HOW. 

Overtime the how begins to shape our identity. Over time it’s easy to allow the how to become more important than the why. How is easy to see and do. How is more measurable. How shapes our identity and then when the how shifts we have an identity crisis. 

The truth is, if you wrap your identity around how you do what you do, you set yourself up. Maybe the identity crisis isn’t the church in general. Somewhere in the context of the wrestle there is a theme that affects our identity. The elephant in the room isn’t communion, confession, or baptism, but the how we do things Sunday. 

We grew up believing and we still do, that there is something magical about Sunday. One day a week built in to set aside. Sunday has been a very important part of our week. Sunday is one of the best opportunities to experience community. People are designed for each other. They are designed to be in a space together. Today we are re-discovering those spaces and finding some digitally. 

Churches should create the best possible experience for families who show up at church on Sunday. 

What you do on Sunday is a big deal and all of a sudden when Sunday stopped, it’s no wonder we began to struggle with what that means. 

Reggie changed his mind about Sunday. He decided that we needed to engage families at church on Sunday. There was something more important than just engaging the kids and we needed to engage the parents. Then Reggie changed his mind about not only engaging the families who showed up at church but we need to leverage Sunday to engage families who are at home. 

To go back to the why we would say we our goal is to help churches to partner with parents to influence the faith and future of a child. What would it look like to think in terms of helping parents win? On Sunday in the church and outside. 

“What happens at HOME is MORE IMPORTANT than what happens at CHURCH.”

What happens at home has more influence. Parents have more time and more influence. The average family has about 3000 hours to influence kids. The average church has about 40 hours with kids who show up constantly. Over time it’s easy to drift and forget the power of what happens at home. We begin to think about what happens at home is “as important” then later you think what happens at church is more important than home. You drift. 

Can we turn the volume up on how we focus on what happens on Sunday in homes? 

Can we think about the families who do show up and be intentional about the families who do not show up. Church will always be a priority for some families, but not for most. 

So, what if every family became a priority for your church, especially those who don’t attend. 

2 mindsets in our country. 

A Sunday at home mindset, they stay home. A Sunday at church mindset, they go to church. 

And some people have both. The tension in our culture is this tension. Most people are Sunday at home families. And most churches are programmed to be Sunday at church churches. 

After Covid-19, families will go back to church. Not all will go back right away. 72% of Americans say they will not go back to a football game until there is a vaccination. Even in the light of the uncertainty of all this, what happened in this crisis is an amazing wake-up call. This gave us the opportunity to think about everyone who’s not coming to church. It forced us to expand our mindset and innovate back to another idea about the family and the home. 

Don’t stop thinking about that when the doors open back up. Let’s keep thinking about the people that don’t come. 

“What if there’s a way to expand our Sunday-at-Church mindset to include a Sunday-at-Home mindset? The truth is a lot of people don’t go to church. What does it look like if we decide the why is love and we need to be intuitional about loving those at home. The number is growing in the Sunday at Home mindset. 

Stats show a 10% drop in church attendance over the last 50 years, now in the last 10 years another 10% drop. Most of our energy goes to Sunday at church. What would it look like if we gave energy to Sunday at home? 

Boomers 76% identify as Christians and 35% have a Sunday at home mindset.

Gen X 69% identify as Christians and 32% have a Sunday at home mindset.

Millennials 49% identify as Christians and 22% have a Sunday at home mindset.

Our tendency is to then try to do church better. But what if we reimagined the how? Look at the big picture. 

In every statistic there’s about a 46-44% difference in those who identify as Christians and those who go to church. So what if we re-imagined the church. What if we tried to raise the 49% stat because more people will in turn show up at church. What if we care about people who have a Sunday at home mindset. What does it look like to bridge into the world of those with a Sunday at home mindset. 

Millennials: 80% believe in God, 69% believe in Heaven, 67 believe religion is important, 64% pray. We assume sometimes that if they have a Sunday at home mindset then they don’t believe in God or are not faith-friendly, but they are interested in spiritual issues. A huge part of our population care about spiritual issues they just don’t go to church. What if we cared for that group? 

Jesus told a parable one day about a shepherd with 100 sheep. If one strays why not leave the 99 for the 1. A powerful message about the value of people. We have about 22% of Millennials with a Sunday at church mindset. We continue to build the church as strong as we can, but what would it look like, in light of what happened in our country, what would it look like for us to leave the 22% to go after the 70%? 

We have a generation who have already redefined church in their mind and they are not showing up on Sunday. 

What would it look like if in your church you started thinking in terms of the families who don’t come, in creative ways? Not simply to get them to change their mind about Sunday but to help them win at home. What if you measured success by Sunday morning attendance and engaging families who don’t show up on Sunday? 

When it comes to budget and vision, if you connect the why to your vision you can get people to invest. There’s a why here that we haven’t even thought about. There are grandparents who would give to that. They have grandkids who have disengaged with the church and would give to something that would help the church re-engage families on their turf in a way that will reengage their faith. They haven’t walked away from God, they haven’t walked away from religion, but they have walked away from attending church. 

If this became a vision we presented in a way that made sense people would follow it. People would say, they have a friend who aren’t going to come to church but if you give me a way to do small group with them to engage with around issues of faith, they will follow. 

There are families who won’t go to your church but if you invite them into something because you are giving them permission to engage faith at home, they would love the idea of being connected to your faith community in a different way then just showing up on Sunday morning. 

The reason we should do this is not the numerical potential but because Paul wrote a letter to the Corinthians. Paul said that love does. 

“Do we love the families who don’t come to our churches as much as we love the families who do?”

What would it look like to put action to that? Yes, Sunday needs to be the best opportunity of the week, but this crisis has taught us to not only get ready for those who come on Sunday but to get ready for those who can’t come or won’t come. 

The church isn’t going anywhere. This isn’t the first storm the church has faced. This isn’t our last wake up call for why we do what we do. 

Somewhere in the context of this all we are trying to do is lean in and ask what would it look like for you to leverage your resources and think in term so this unprecedented time of sending a message to people who don’t know how they connect with you in the church. 

This crisis is like Paul on the road to Damascus. Paul pivoted. Paul changed his mind. It clarified his identity. Paul at that moment in time is the leader that God called to change the gentile world. 

Have you ever wondered WHY you are leading in this moment?

Have you wondered where you fit in this? Have you wondered why you are leading at this moment? In the middle of something that shakes our identity to our core, you are a leader now. This is an indicator that God wants to do do something unique with you, that you have a voice, and God wants to do something. 

Paul pivoted. We can reach a population that has disengaged. We can leverage this as an opportunity to let them know we care about what happens in their home and we want them to win. We can redefine ourselves in a culture that has already redefined us.  

Want to watch the opening session? Click here: https://www.facebook.com/watch/live/?v=295568868115843&ref=watch_permalink

Navigating Change Requires Courageous Leaders

Jimmy Mellado and Reggie Joiner

We are all poor and rich, just in different ways. 

When visiting churches around the world you see that they may not have money but the churches and families with Jesus in the center have all they need. 

The crisis we are all experiencing can be a tool. Something used to help us develop empathy. You have people hurting who have never felt this pain but you also have people around them with constant pain. We need to build empathy to learn and see each other differently. 

This pandemic doesn’t discriminate on status or levels of power. It’s hitting the rich and the poor. The pandemic was a leveler. It doesn’t discriminate on finances or power. The community is coming together because everyone is hurting. 

Leadership is influence plus courage. 

How do you respond in a crisis when you lose productivity and control? Left to ourselves and focusing on ourselves it leads to depression. One of the best antidotes is becoming others-centered. Serving other people. One of the best things you can do for your spatial, emotional, and physical health is serving another person. Leverage your influence and your courage to serve others. Your soul will be built in the process. 

New doesn’t happen without leadership and leadership doesn’t happen without courage and influence. Take people to a new place, a better place. 

Culture doesn’t define what a church should do. Innovate to the original. What is the original intent God placed on the church? Jesus was the most attractive and magnetic person on the planet. When the church doesn’t resemble Jesus, somethings wrong. Change in the church is about deconstructing the human part to look more like Jesus. 

In NFL stadiums lights are turned off. Would we help them fill a symbolic stadium because of Covid-19 and join compassion to sponsor 70,000 kids?

Change Reminds Me Things Can Change

Jonathan Williams 

2 Corinthians 1:3-4
“All praise to God, the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ. God is our merciful Father and the source of all comfort. He comforts us in all our troubles so that we can comfort others. When they are troubled, we will be able to give them the same comfort God has given us.”

I am just here.

Churches need to get back to their human-ness. Opening up, sharing the pain we’re most scared to share, are the things that can bring people to Christ who are feeling hopeless.

I think the church has an amazing opportunity right now to share its humanness.

Mike Foster, Kara Powell, Kristen Ivy, and Reggie Joiner

How can we as leaders respond to stories like this? 

Jon held a story of suffering inside for about 26 years. Because he held this story, he suffered alone. I want to lead in a way people don’t have to suffer silently with their stories regardless of how they look like. We can create safe places for people to be able to open up. 

You set the tone and the pace for how safe people feel. Sharing our own not so perfect story opens the door. Go first with your own story. 

What do we do when people open up and share their story. 3 responses. 

Validate their pain and feelings. Don’t dismiss or control. Don’t just give them a bible verse. 

Appreciate and honor that act of bravery. 

Refer. We don’t have to have a solution to everybody’s problems. This lie leads you into horrible heart work. You will be over your head so get in the habit of referring and not being the hero with all the answers. Come along the community of healers and helpers. Support in a collective. 

How do we show up in this space and help? 

We are in a unique time and experience. Old coping mechanisms have been stripped away. You can’t fill your time with more activities and people because the world has changed. Step into suffering. 

Kara has been asked a question in the last couple of weeks. Before the quarantine, it was hard to understand young people’s anxiety. Now that we aren’t in the same room it’s even harder to identify anxiety, depression, and suicidal thoughts. How do we get a gage today? 

Be a great listening. Give the gift of full presence. This is what Jesus did and this is the mark of true love. 

I’m here, you’re not alone, but it is your work to get done. 

Opening the door is such a big deal when partnering with parents. Parents can have conversations with their kids. Look kids in the eye and ask how they are doing and let them know there is nothing they can’t tell us. 

Tips for building relationships? Sometimes we live in denial about our own kids. We know other families are struggling but not our kids. Ask the hard question and lean in. What is sleep looking like? What is eating look like? What is the tone of conversations? You can’t delegate this role to a pastor. 

On a scale of 1 to 10. 10 being very anxious and 1 not being anxious at all. 6 and above you need to bring in support. If they can’t pick their own number say I feel like you are a # and see how they respond. Do something to create specificity and put it into words. Draw what you’re feeling inside. 

A daily check-in with your mind, your heart, and your body. How are your thoughts? What are the emotions you are feeling right now? Can you name them and identify them and are you carrying them? In your body are you holding any tension in your body? Your body communicates your mental health but you rarely ask how you are feeling in your body. 

There are times we miss it and the signs are hard to read. If your kids are suffering and you had no idea, that is very common. As proactive as you can be there’s not one thing you could do to make everything safe for your kid. 

We carry a lot of guilt and shame around these topics and it brings more bad health. 

Give them a way to qualify their feelings. How is the weather? 

Mental health is not a one-person solution. Community Care. Bring in additional help and resources. 


If you’re wrestling right now, invite someone in. 

We as leaders need to gather help, use the resources available. 

Give hope to a generation. Hope is one of the things that remain and hope is tied to love. 

The Gospel is Still Good News

Kristen Ivy

 Is the hope that I have to offer really enough. 

Ask yourself why 5 times. 

Why is the Gospel good news? Why? Why? Why?

We need to be prepared to give an answer but we need to pause to ask the question of why they are asking the question. 

The good news to me might not sound like good news to someone else. Pause long enough to know how to respond to people. 

Become all things to all people. Paul was suggesting we need to understand people first. It’s hard to give people hope before knowing why they need hope. Understand their perspective. 

If you want the good news, to sound like good news, you need to understand WHY it’s good news for everyone.

The Gospel is good news for everyone 

(from 5 essential perspectives)

World 1 Separation &  Union

Problem: Abandonment

Jesus is the revealer and gives us hope of heaven. 

World 2 Conflict & Vindication 

Problem: Oppression

Jesus is Messiah/ Liberator

World 3 Emptiness & Fulfillment  *Majority

Problem: Insignificance

Jesus is Example/ Model

World 4 Condemnation & Forgiveness

Problem: Sin/Ego

Jesus is Savior/ Redeemer

World 5 Suffering & Endurance

Problem: Meaninglessness

Jesus is Suffering Servant

It matters if you want to give hope…if you want to give an answer to the question someone is asking. 

What do you do when someone says, “I don’t feel as guilty as they want me to feel.” How do you share the Gospel with someone who doesn’t see the need for this good news? 

Whenever you deliver one kind of worship song, preach one worldview, you are lacking a theology that someone in the room needs. 

If you want the good news to sound like good news, we all need variety. What worship songs speak to all 5 perspectives? What messages would preach to all 5 perspectives? There is a richness to the Gospel if we just lean into it completely. Remember why the Good News is the good news for everyone. 

The Grace You Give Yourself Changes Everything. 

Nona Jones

Outrun the pain of past failure. 

Peter, the Rock. 

Who do you say I am?
The Messiah the Son of the living God. 

Shame – What I did.

Guilt – Who I am.

The Rock is saying who I am.
The Rooster is saying who I will never be.

No matter how deeply you have been broken, you are never beyond the reach of God’s grace.

Your brokenness is not your burden, your brokenness is your ministry. 

My grace is sufficient for you. My strength is made perfect in weakness. 

The grace you give yourself changes everything. 

Step into the second act of your calling. Peter accepted the grace God gave him and his situation. 

How to Build Digital Community? 

No matter what you think you know, you never know what the future knows. This uncertainty is an opportunity. 

Church, you have to pivot. 

You have to let go of normal. God is kicking us out of the box of what church is. Jesus put his name on people not on buildings. You innovate to the original. Going back to the starting point of what really matters. 

How you can learn and teach yourself? Who can you talk to and listen to? 

Don’t be intimidated by tech. It’s built to be user friendly. Investigate and explore. 

Dive in. You’re not going to learn with a manual or article. You will learn by doing it. 

Don’t relegate technology to the social media team. You will become so reliant on them you won’t be able to function. 

The future is bright. God knew this was going to happen. He called you to leadership during this season. You are placed here for such a time as this. Lean into the opportunity it provides. Don’t allow the enemy to make you feel overwhelmed. 

Everything Changes But You Can Still Play

Simon Sinek

Organizations face change all the time. The internet changed everything, it put some companies out of business and propelled others. What’s different about this is it’s more sudden than what we are used to. 

How are we going to adapt our model to these new times? We have to have these meetings, quickly. 

Why did we get into this business in the first place? When we set out on this journey of risk and uncertainty we stepped out knowing it was worth it. What was worth it then is still worth it now. 

The learning curve is steep. The standards for quality are much lower now. Think at home wearing a t-shirt and things put together with duct tape. We can fix things as we go. There’s an opportunity if we are willing to change. 

Change actually highlights what doesn’t change. 

The crisis is a great revealer of people, inner strength, relationships, and the stupidity of how we have been living our lives. We actually think our political views are important but when a tornado goes through a town we don’t care about color, politics, and our religious beliefs we realize we are all in this together. 

Crisis gets us out of the weeds. We have become a very selfish society. 

If you are leaning into leaders who are on the front lines and saying to them you are in this time for a reason. You have a platform and an opportunity. What should they say and do because the world is watching them. 

This is a time of asking for help and vulnerability. Embrace it. You can’t do it all. People aren’t disposable. There’s too much going on and too many balls in the air to juggle. If you want to save jobs and lives literally and figuratively then say to the people you are working with, I can not do this alone and need your help. As a team, we are strong enough to do this together. Embrace the strength of others. 

Infinity Game – Play to play not play to win. Why keep moving? Finite games have winners and losers with fixed rules. Infinite games you stay in as long as you can to move the game forward. There’s no such thing as winning in education or your marriage. It’s not about being #1 or beating your competitors. You can not win in a game that has no finish line. When you play to win in a game that doesn’t end you destroy trust and innovation. Play the game with the right mindset. This season is just part of the journey. 

This is our first global pandemic but it’s not the first. We will get through this. 

Creating a “Love Works” Model

Joel Manby 

1 Corinthians 13:4-8

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.  It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails.

Love works as a leadership principle. 

Without culture, we don’t keep the great people. Culture is critical to stay and be engaged. 

The level of enthusiasm of your church experience will never rise above that of your employees and volunteers. You have a culture whether you define it or not. Teach the words of love to teach a great culture. 

Love is Jesus #1 commandment and the problem to being effective. 

Engagement scores go up when you put love in place. 

You have a culture whether you define it or not. Most companies have their plaques on the wall for their values but only 10% put practices behind it. Define the words and what they mean. 

Do goals. Be goals. Get the top raise. 

Do goals are numerical and be goals are the type of leaders you want to be. Measured and reinforced. 

If it works, why do we not do it more? 

It might come across as soft or hard to measure. 

Love Works

Create this culture by defining it, put the surveys out, then talk about it continually. Be brutally honest if someone is failing. Allow everyone to speak it back to you. 

Everything Changes But Nothing Changes with Paula Dannielle, Crystal Chiang, Tom Shefchunas

We need to change. How we measure things has to changes. When life changes it helps us look at things differently. What’s under the rug. 

Nothing changes quite like a kid changing through the phases. 

It’s not okay to take the 5 ways the Gospel is good news for everyone for granted in preschool. Talk about the essentials. 

Attendance isn’t a good measure of success. How to measure if a small group is working. 

How do you talk about middle school? What’s the reputation? When you want to gain leaders, you have to talk about the ministry differently. 

Breakout 1 Re-Evaluating Your Next-Gen Ministry with Lisette Fraser

To be ready for when a crisis hits, plan for the life stage transitions.

Church as we know it is closed, we have time to take steps back and evaluate. 

When we reopen how do we make sure we don’t miss the most important things. 

Elevate Community

Give every kid a caring leader & a predictable and safe community where they can grow spiritually.

Because it’s hard we lean into the idea that information creates transformation but we know this is a faulty formula. Information plus conversation multiplied by relationship creates transformation. 

Anything that was a crack now becomes a chasm. If you were lacking leadership in this area then now the crack is huge. 

Reprioritize the importance of community! 

Engage Every Parent

Engage parents to have a positive influence in the spiritual development of their own kids.

Sometimes we think we are better at spiritual developing kids than parents are. Don’t slip into this. 

Another tension is how to engage with a parent that isn’t physically there. The further the parent is the less we consider them. We need to fight for this priority. 

How do you view your role? Are the driver of the faith journey or a passenger in the families car? 

Take an honest look at how many parents you are engaging. Really consider how many you are talking to and when. Are you chasing parents? If they are really the most important how are you engaging them and equipping them for success. 

Align Leaders 

Align leaders to lead with the same end in mind with a common language and a common strategy.

Someone believes they are the red-headed stepchild. They might also think they are the favorite. 

Get everyone on the same page moving the same direction. Every leader matters. 

As a nextgen leader, we help everyone see the whole picture together and to clear the lane for them to run in the right direction clearly. 

It’s easier to allow everyone to run their own direction but it’s not better. 

In a world in constant change, what if the world was the place of peace and stable. 

Have you identified a strategy and common language? 

Do we hold people accountable to it?

Refine the Message

Craft core truths into engaging, relevant and memorable experiences that correlate with the faith formations of each phase.

Every age and phase needs something different. Each message needs to be refined differently. 

Think of a child’s life holistically. Before and after usage and stage-wise, we are all carrying the ball the same way.

Influence Service

Create consistent opportunities for kids and teenagers to serve.

Tension of our scope to serve faithfully. Everyone can serve at every age and stage. How do we reflect that we believe young people can serve now. Equip the adult leaders who will serve with them. 

Can little kids greet? Can they park cars? How do we equip kids and leaders to receive them to be serving? 

Social media now is how to come alongside families. How can we equip parents this week to disciple their kids? What tools can we put in their hands? 

We all think differently and approach ministry differently. We need to hear how other people are doing because it’s not that one is better than the other. 

Find projects you can build together that benefits everyone. Help everyone see that we all have the same kids and are walking them all down the same path. 

We have been hired to champion the phases. Share stories. Nothing changes minds or helps people understand more than a story. Generate and tell great stories. 

First, define reality and know what is there to work with. Next, evaluate how you are doing. See where your gauges are and define direction. 

Leverage tools because people are more important than the grind of ministry. Trust volunteers to lead in significant roles. 

To mobilize kids and students you need to know who you are partnering them with. Help the whole church care about the legacy of the church. We know serving is a significant role. Everyone is searching for identity, belonging, and purpose and serving makes this possible. Help the church and the adults see how them training kids and coming alongside kids to be serving. Remind them of what this was like for them when they first started. Can they do the same for the young person? Maybe they didn’t have a chance as a young person and now they can give a young person a chance. 

Thoughts on digital and physical moving forward? 

There are places where we can be more effective online compared to in person. People might not show up in person but online. Is there a hybrid available where you can do something online and in person. Decentralizing some things. Help people lead in their communities and in their homes. Small groups only for a season, how do we really empower leaders to be doing ministry as opposed to gathering. 

Breakout 2 Relaunching Your Church By Making Families Stronger with Geoff Surratt

What can be more effective in family ministry? 

If you had a lot of kids and a lot of events and no one was arrested then you felt successful. If you sent kids to camp and people were saved every year then you felt successful. In kids ministry if you kept the kids entertained while their parents when to church then you felt successful. Everything changes when you realize the goal is to partner with parents. 

Partner with Parents

Parents are more present at home.

Families are more connected to the church.

The big question was HOW?

The picture of a child with their parent praying with a small group leader over zoom. This is the picture of family minstry. 

Four Revolutionary Opportunities for Families

1 Environments for families to Worship Together

Create experiences where families and kids can come together. Families going to church together in a tent is a memorable experience. How do we carry this idea and experience forward? 

2 Creative ways for families to Play Together

Game nights or kids and their parents.

3 Resources for Families to Grow Together

Parent resource website – one easy to find spot. 

Online small groups for every age, even preschool. 15 minutes of crazy. 

4 Opportunities for families to Serve Together

A family parade to the assisted living communities. Create moments for families to serve together. Birthday drive-by parades. 

We have to make it




Groups of 50 or 100:

What can ministry look like with these groups? What does online continue to look like? 

Not just a bandage but new thinking and opportunity. What if it continues like this for the rest of the year or for years? 

Let’s not panic and post something everywhere, let’s take a breathe and realize it’s a marathon. Help them engage again. 

What if we celebrate when families are not at church but pastoring their teams or being out doing ministry? 

Breakout 3 How to Make Small Groups Win for Kids with Keedren & Keturah Boston 

People need two things.
A person and a place.

A gym can still make kids feel like it’s their own place. 

Lead Small – You can have a big impact in kids when you invest in kids. 

Small groups give kids someone. 

Someone who cares. 

A small group leader.

Small groups give kids somewhere. A safe environment and atmosphere to belong.

How are you allocating your resources?  

Act like you believe it.

Improve your structure to make relationships matter.

Structure is important because kids need order. Be organized to be organic. Small groups need to actually be small groups. 

Empower leaders who make relationships matter.

Create experiences where make relationships matter.

How does your calendar year impact small groups? When do you promote? At the end of the kindergarten year do you say goodbye or do you say hello? What are you communicating to kids and families? How do you help your few go to the next level? 

Professionals are not always those with the titles and degrees but the team you are leading. Give them the opportunity and show them the expectations. Do you have consistent leaders who are committed and showing up weekly? 

There’s nothing worse then a leader who doesn’t feel needed or know what is expected of them. 

Your best leaders recruit the best leaders. This is a process not an event. 

Spoil your leaders. Love them. 

Create experiences where relationships matter. Circle Time. Give a talking piece. 

Have compassion and show compassion. 

Zoom and google hangout are a great resource for your families and kids.

Communicate these to families and let the know what’s available. 

Allow leaders to speak into the vision and know they have a safe place to voice insights into the ministry. 

Consider doing training now. 

Record session if people miss things. 

Every Sunday is someones first Sunday. 

Let everyone in the small group speak. Make sure everyone is comfortable sharing. 

Go directly into circles with the talking piece so they are ready to start sharing and talking. Give them something physically to hold and talk. After circle time they break into even smaller groups. 

Breakout 4 – Responding To Kids With Anxiety And Depression with Dave Thomas & Sissy Goff

Anxiety and Depression Statistics

‣ Anxiety is now considered a childhood epidemic in America, affecting 1 in 4 kids. Girls twice as likely.

‣ 10-15% of children and teenagers are depressed at any given time.

‣ Teenagers are 5-8x more likely to fit the criteria for anxiety or major depression than half a century ago.

‣ In a survey of students in grades 9-12, 16% of students reported seriously considering suicide, 13% reported creating a plan, and 8% reported trying to take their own life in the 12 months preceding the survey.

Look for:

A loss of interest in things they used to love. If they withdraw from friends. A lot of tears. An emotional withdrawal. In childhood, it’s recognized pretty easy but in students, it just sounds like adolescences. With teens watch for this to manifest with their peers. Normally kids might feel that way at home and they lift with their friends. 

With anxiety, it’s like the one loop roller coaster at the fair. When they keep coming back over and over again and they can’t kick it. 

Endless questions. When they keep asking the same issues. 

Watch for exploding and imploding. Anger is a secondary emotion. When kids meltdown with a schedule change. With no predictability or lead time they explode. Implodes become perfectionistic. Stomach aches before school. 

Anxiety is also a parenting epidemic. 8 years old is often the onset. Parents might also bring anxiety to their kids. 

Parents escape and avoid it. They might pull them out of situations instead of helping them work through the scary things.  

Anxiety is an overestimation of the problem and an underestimation of themselves. 

Help – For the body, brain, and heart. 

When we are calm we have blood flow in our brains and in the front of our brains to think rationally and manage our emotions. When we are emotionally charged the blood flow moves to the back of the brain and fight or flight kicks in. Help blood flow move back to the front. Start with slow relaxation breathing. Square breathing or combat breathing. 

Grounding Techniques. Move the brain back to the present and not the past. Often teach kids to work with their scenes. 54321. 5 things see hear smell taste. Count backward from 7. Something to reset the brain. 

Then help them with their hearts. Make sure they have an emotional vocabulary. Get a feelings chart. Faces with expressions and words under. Develop an emotional vocabulary because kids are switching words around. They don’t say “sad” anymore they say depressed. Before they said they would run away but today they say they will kill themselves.  

Kids use words but don’t really know what they mean. Help them accurately express their feelings. 

Help kids do the scary thing. Gradually like steps on a ladder. 

Help kids practice. Practice makes progress. 

God has not given you a Spirit of fear. This resets their brain and hides God’s word in their hearts. 


Kids feel the bravest when someone who loves them reminds them of the truth of who they are. 

 “In this world, you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.” John 16:33

There has never been this space and time when they talk about emotions so much but their faith is not impacting their emotions. We need a net of faith to catch us when we fall. There is trouble but take heart because Jesus has overcome the world. Call out bravery you see in kids. 

Remind kids of the reality of who God called them to be. They are not alone, God is with them and redeeming them. Remind them of this truth. 

Kids often go 2 years before they get help. 

Come to parents in a collaborative way. I wonder if we are seeing the same things. The “of course” principle. Of course, you know we are in it to help you. Of course, you know it would be damaging to talk negatively about your ex in front of your kids. 

Parents who are type-a had anxiety when they were growing up but didn’t talk about it growing up. We want to help find ways to support you and your child at this time. 

Watch your own anxiety in front of your kids because they absorb it. Managing your own anxiety will help your kids with theirs. 

Everything Changes but Change Doesn’t Affect Everybody the Same. 

Monec Johnson, Meaghan Wall, Diane Kim

Build a bridge to families throughout our communities. 

Every family should have a family app. You can customize the parent cue app for your families. 

There’s a gap of about 70,000 kids who need sponsored through compassion. Visit compassion.com/teamup-orange to donate. 

When everything changes, things change in a different way for different people. 

Our perception changes constantly. The church is so tightly sealed in a box that sometimes special needs kids don’t fit in. Make sure every single person can experience the love of God. 

There may be some homes where parents are activity seeking a partnership. Where they need help with their child with special needs. 

Get the resource on OrangeLeaders.com/resources called Every Family 

You can experience a love that liberates from fear. Danielle Strickland

No one can stop an idea whose time has come –Winnie Mandela 

Components of revolutions: 

1) An incredible idea at the right time.

2) A catalytic leader with a community of support.

3) Some sort of mechanism to communicate the original message.

The revolution Jesus introduced was inside out. An eternal revolution.

Love is a revolution. 

Jesus’ revolution started with an idea, the most radical and revolutionary idea ever. The idea that God is love and we are loved by God.

God is love. And you are loved by God. These are the two ideas at the core of the revolution of God.

The fullness of time. Or at just the right time. The idea that God is love came to earth. 

Love is an inside out revolution that awakens us to see what could be.

Love invites us to know the truth, to get at the truth. Not just about God, but about us.

Love woke me up.

Love awakens us to what could be and what should be.

Love empowers us to be the revolution that the world desperately needs.

Love the ultimate revolution. We hold up not a national flag, but a Kingdom flag.

Reggie Joiner, Bernice King, Jennifer Barnes, Sam Collier

Prayer, “God will you give me friends of color.” 

It starts with a desire. If you have a desire you will seek it out. That seeking will lead you to people who are different than you. If you are closed minded, it just doesn’t happen. 

Be a seeker of people who are different than you. 

Be on an open minded journey. 

Treat people with dignity and respect. 

Be a bridge, not just racially but generationally. 

Jesus always talked about us being one. One above all else. It can be difficult to press pause long enough on your pain to connect. If we’re going to see the kingdom rise like never before, we’re going to have to do that Jesus work to pause and connect.

The issue of privilege is a serious issue in our world.

We don’t want to punt the problem to the next generation. We need to dig in and be courageous going forward. 

What is it about the word “privilege” that puts people on the defensive.

Give yourself permission to be vulnerable in relationships. 

We must learn to live together as brothers or perish together as fools.

We need to change our approach for a generation that’s changed their minds.

Paul said I have become all things to all people. 

We need to change our approach for a generation that’s changed their mind.

The Next Generation Still Needs a Dynamic Faith – Andy Stanley

Learn everything we can so we will be better the next time around. Create an icon, something as a physical reminder to take the lesson forward. 

How to invite the next generation into a dynamic faith. “Invite” being the dynamic word. 

What does it mean to have a great church? Be lead by people who love Jesus, love like Jesus, and have a plan to help the next generation love Jesus. 

Churches that have a plan for the next generation, generally do better as a church. Churches invested in the next generation have more resources. 

If you’re going to be a church that is about the next generation, organize your church towards the next generation as far as staffing and budget. No matter what’s on the wall. Organizations are dumb things, they do what they are organized and structured to do. Organize to this idea of the next generation. 

All information and misinformation is at their fingertips 24/7. This sets this generation apart form all other generations. In terms of how we talk about the Bible, we have not embraced this reality. 

Not only do they know what’s in the Bible, because you are teaching them, but they can find out what else is in the Bible. All the parts we have skipped or don’t want them to ask us about. 

This generation is on a meaning and security quest, not a truth quest. We can leverage this for a dynamic faith. This is important in our approach to the invitation. 

Inclusion, diversity, and sustainability are moral issues for this generation. Not political issues but right and wrong moral issues. 

With one silly statement or wrong humor you can undermine your credibility with this generation. This is true in their minds but not consistent in their worldview. 

Love is their ethic but it is loosely and conveniently defined. It’s very situational and conversational. They come to the defense of those who are mistreated but will break up with their girlfriend over text. 

In light of that…

1. Frame the invitation around following Jesus. Rather than an invitation to pray or become a noun of a Christian. A dynamic faith. The word Christian isn’t dynamic anymore but simply a label. Ask, “Are you following Jesus?” Jesus follower reflects the first century calling of a Christian. Someone who is acting or being like Christ. Is it just what you believe or what you do and behave? Lordship. Have you acknowledged God as the Lord you will follow? Be a doer and not just a believer. Doing is what makes all the difference. Do you hear Jesus and put His words into practice? Are your students building their house on sand? 

2. Establish the Gospels as the text that informs their faith. Not the entire Bible. Inviting into a dynamic faith. Draw their attention to the text of the Gospels. The Old Testament got Jesus here but the New Testament shows us who He is. 

Hebrews 10:1, “The law is only a shadow of the good things that are coming—not the realities themselves.” 

The OT looked ahead but now that the reality is here, that should be our focus. We are inviting students to follow Jesus. 

All authority in heaven and earth has ben given to me. Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and the Son and of the Holy Spirit, and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age. Matthew 28:19. 

The starting point of inviting the next generation to a dynamic faith is to invite them to follow Jesus. The Christian faith did not begin with Genesis. The Christian faith began with Jesus. All authority rests with Jesus. The Bible doesn’t create Christianity, Jesus did. 

In the pre-internet world, this concept didn’t matter as much but today the next generation has access to everything in the Bible without ever touching a Bible. So, inviting this generation to a faith based on the authority of the entirety of the Bible is a non-starter because they can discover within 20-30 minutes all the parts that do not support the Christian faith. They are going to ask good questions. Better questions then you ask. They are far less incline to develop a presuppositional faith. 

Our faith can withstand the onslaught of the critics, if we build our faith on the right foundation, the Gospels, Jesus. 

3. Anchor their orthopraxy to Jesus’s new covenant command. Orthopraxy is right practice or behavior. What they do with their bodies and their money. 

Jesus taught in John 13:34-35, “ A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another.” 

Jesus creates the guardrails for this love. Specifically defined. Where we should start in what it looks like to follow Jesus. We don’t get to make this up, we are told exactly what love looks like. To love like Jesus. 

In the Gospels we see this brand of love illustrated through Jesus. In the letters of Paul we see this love applied. Forgive as you have forgiven. Submit to one another. All pointing to Jesus example. 

If the invitation is to be dynamic faith, begin with the invitation to follow Jesus, anchor them with the Gospels, and the beginning of application to follow Jesus is the command to love one another. 

By this the world will see you are my follower, if you love. Following Jesus is about a life you live. At the center is love. This love is laying down your life for a friend. Putting others first. Forgiving because you have been forgiven. Accepting because you have been accepted by God. 

The dynamic of faith is not what we believe but what we do. Following Jesus is dynamic. This makes faith real and practical. 

What does love require of me? 

You can do this. You must do this. 

What’s more important than the faith of the next generation? Nothing.

Build a bridge to families inside and outside of your church. 

Phase Project with Kristen Ivey

What are the basic and core things you need to know at every phase. Every parent knows their child better than any other person on the planet. The guide is designed to help the parent fill the information in with what they know. 

What You Do This Week Still Matters with Doug Fields

Philippians 1:1 “This letter is from Paul and Timothy, slaves of Christ Jesus. I am writing to all of God’s holy people in Philippi who belong to Christ Jesus, including the church leaders[a] and deacons. May God our Father and the Lord Jesus Christ give you grace and peace.”

What still matters is being…In Contact. 

Phone calls worked then and they work now. Recording and sending short videos. Do your kids and leaders know you want to be with them. 

Philippians 1:3-4, “Every time I think of you, I give thanks to my God. Whenever I pray, I make my requests for all of you with joy”

What still matters is being…In Prayer

Are you praying for the flock God has entrusted to your care. Do they actually know about it? 

Type in prayer request and follow up. 

Philippians 1:6, “And I am certain that God, who began the good work within you, will continue his work until it is finally finished on the day when Christ Jesus returns.”

What still matters is being…Spiritually Encouraging. 

This means painting a picture of hope. Church is a safe place for them to return when they do fail. Jesus painted this picture with Simon. What picture are you painting for those entrusted to your care? 

Not as sexy as zoom calls and digital baptism but what the church did and what is on display. Some things just don’t need to change. 

How the church response will change the next generation with Kara Powell 

Pastor Fails

90% of questions how we can do church online. 10% about howe we could be church all week. Is this how we should function? Whether we can meet in person or digital.

How did Jesus spend His time? Certainly not 90% inside the church and in church worship. 

When it comes to our time and engird the revolution focuses less on our worship services and more on our service of others. 

Your churches resources and other’s needs. The beauty happens when these two interact and overlap. What resources do you have that can be leveraged to meet needs. 

Now, consider the resources of young peoples time. Can you help meet the needs of schools in the neighborhoods? Traditions have been crushed. Over the summer, serve locally and offer replacement events. How are you using the resources of young people’s times. Mailing origami. Thinking of you and would love to connect. Help meet needs of your neighborhood. Creating flyers and distributed door to door. Are you struggling, call our church. 

Use young people’s time to serve the marginalized. Senior adults. Senior to senior service. Left with two pots of flowers, one left for the student and one for the senior to give to another senior citizen. 

Visit FullerYouthInstitute.org/orange to maximize your ministry during this pandemic. 

Young people don’t want to go to a meeting they want to be part of a movement. 

Young people leave the church to find the church.

Don’t snap back to normal, harness this time for a new deeper revolution. 

A kid will get over what I teach then, but they will never get over what God does through them.” -Reggie Joiner 

How to Start a Kindness Revolution with Brad Montague

We all still need to be good neighbors. 

Six words from Fred. “You were a child once, too.”

Be who you needed when you were younger. 

Don’t edit someone’s work. Elevate it.

Breakout 5 Developing Other Leaders with Doug Fields 

What makes you a good leader who helps people? That’s just what you do when you care for people. Why are we not very good at it? Many church leaders are busy, scared, and insecure. 

Self-preservation leader: busy, scared, and insecure. 

Few church leaders are intentional with developing other leaders. 

Leaders have to decide if they want to leave a legacy of one or a legacy of many. 

Give up your pride.

Not easy because in ministry we rarely get credit for the work we do. Become a spotlight leader. Insecure leaders don’t bring out the best in others. 

Give up your perfectionism. 

We know the cliche if we want the job done do it yourself. This is not a beatitude from the sermon on the mount. They might not do it as good as you…right away, but you are developing them. 

Give them your genuine belief

I don’t think you can encourage people too much. People are dying for encouragement. People need more encouragement than training. Make a list of your leaders. Pray over them. Ask, what do you see in these leaders that maybe they don’t see. 

You don’t delegate tasks, you dump them

Give them meaningful relationships. 

Give them real responsibilities

A responsibility is significant when both the rewards and the risks are real. 

Give them meaningful relationships 

Invite them into your life.

Not to use them but to know them. If you are burning through leaders and have poor retention then you are using people. 

Give them accountability.

 If you expect something, you need to inspect it. If you hire someone, don’t turn your back on them. Develop them and bring out the best in them. Make them into great leaders. 

3 times a year, Doug goes through leaders and gives every volunteer an a, b, or c. 

A’s need encouragement. Maybe get the pastor or a leader to write them a letter. 

B’s need intentional coaching and hand holding. 

C’s are how you get them into another ministry in the church. 

Give them freedom. 

The best idea wins. You don’t always have to win. Let them lead in a way that is different than you. 


Breakout 6 Increasing Your Influence and Effectiveness in Kids Ministry with Kellen Moore

Talk about it.

‣ Talk openly about what is going well and poorly in your world.

‣ Cheer for each other when you’re talking about each other.

‣ Share stories of students that grew up in your kids ministry.

Develop a curiosity about the youth ministry. 


‣ on transitions.

‣ on the budget. 

‣ on space.

‣ on volunteers.

 Create a common language for families

‣ Small groups vs. disciple groups vs. life groups

‣Teaching calendar vs. scope and cycle

‣ Drop-off vs. check-in

‣ Baptism vs. big splash

Breakout 7 Create Something for Kids that Parents Love with Angela Santomero

 Vision: All media must have a vision to make the world a better place for kids

Mission: My Mission for all the media work I do is to empower, challenge and build the self- esteem of kids, while making them laugh!

Healthy Green Media Smoothie

‣ Equal parts: ‣ Educate ‣ Interact

‣ Engage

‣ Helps to create and identify high quality media

 Universal Truths of Kids

Needed to create and identify high quality media: 

‣ Play

‣ Pause 

‣ Repeat 

‣ Model 

‣ Help

 Kindness is at the Foundation of everything we do.

Breakout 8 Things Every Ministry Leaders Should Know About Foster Care with Josh Shipp

Foster kids will test you. 

Like the lab bar on a roller coaster. 

Kids will test you to see if you’ll hold

Foster kids will act out. 

What kids don’t talk out…they act out

The very first adult.

It’s not about you.

It’s about someone prior to you. 

When they act out…you lean in. Double down.

“You are awesome…but this was not. Here’s what’s going to happen.” Give foster kids certainty. I will have to do this. 

Foster kids often feel ashamed. 

690,000 kid in the foster care system.

“I used to be one of the but I felt alone.”

Lies: Alone, Broken, Unlovable.

Goal: Identify a peer “lighthouse” a navigational aid and warn of danger. 

Widen the circle. 

The Power of One Caring Adult TED Talk -for teens. 

Lead them with Vulnerability 

Lead with vulnerability

Start where they are

Voice their skepticism

Lead to where they should be. 

Your imperfections make you human

Your humanity makes you influential. 

Foster Kids Need a Coach

Don’t lecture then – coach them. 

Pre-Game: Rehearse

What potential challenges do they need to be prepared to face? 

Post-Game: Review

What did we learn?

During-Game: Release

Can they succeed without me?

Foster Parents Need Support

Practical Support

3 hours or 3 meals

Encouragement and Consequences

Auto-Schedule encouragement 

Pre-define rules and consequences. 

Every kid is one caring adult away rom being a success story. 

Promote Counseling

Both parents and kids


Healthy Expectation

Easy Out

If Possible: Remove $$$ hurdle

Counseling is for the breathing. 

To get resources, text the word JOSH to 66866

Book: No Matter What – A foster care tale by Josh Shipp

Final Words with Reggie Joiner

Creativity thrives in crisis. 

People Need:
To stay connected
To be encouraged now
To win this week
To imagine what’s next

What does it take for us to stack hands on a bigger vision to reach the world in the middle of a crisis to remind them that these three things remain: faith, hope and love?

We all need each other. 

Tomorrow start thinking in terms of how do we start talking about this. 

Capture the imagination that is watching. 

Keep changing your mind for the sake of what never changes. 

I hope to see you at the Orange Conference in 2021! Get the best price now at http://theorangeconference.com